Why don't you believe in Hell?

[Marquis de Carabas]

No you will not be able to swim because of the extreme pain. You will sink and suffocate and feel the LAVA flow into your lungs and burn you alive and this will happen over and over again FOREVER. HELL IS NOT FUNNY OR A JOKE IT IS THE WORST THING YOU WILL EVER EXPERIENCE.

Swim or sink? Make up your mind!

They are not comparable.

You're right. Puss has better fashion sense, and also isn't so vain as to imagine himself the supreme being.

 

[Cosmo]

You must scream Jesus's name when you think you are having a supernatural experience and if it continues it's God put if it leaves it's Satan.

How often do you have supernatural experiences? I've never had one. When I can expect my first to happen? Do I have to wait in line somewhere?

 

[Lisa Simpson]

You must scream Jesus's name when you think you are having a supernatural experience and if it continues it's God put if it leaves it's Satan. Calling up God is not enough you must use the power of the name Jesus to validate it. Calling upon God could also summon Satan. Remember he is a trickster and this is how he does it. Preachers say Satan's favorite time to attack is during prayer. He loves to confuse. The power is in the name Jesus.

So you can never be sure of anything since everything might be a trick. Including everything you've been learnin' in that garage, huh?

 

[1inChrist]

But if I don't have a body, or if I'm already dead, I certainly won't have any lungs. How, exactly, does this work?

And how do you know that this is how it works? Have you ever been there?

You will have another ''spirit'' body when you die. This other body is eternal and cannot die but can feel pain.

 

[Marquis de Carabas]

This is just mean

You all know by now that he doesn't get the subtle humor.

If you tease him, you should then post an explanation

He's confused enough as it is

But I'm an atheist. I live to be mean.

 

[Operaider]

You must scream Jesus's name when you think you are having a supernatural experience and if it continues it's God put if it leaves it's Satan. Calling up God is not enough you must use the power of the name Jesus to validate it. Calling upon God could also summon Satan. Remember he is a trickster and this is how he does it. Preachers say Satan's favorite time to attack is during prayer. He loves to confuse. The power is in the name Jesus.

Ok, i think I got it now

So if the devil is trying to punish us
"Jesus" is the safe word

 

[1inChrist]

Swim or sink? Make up your mind!

When I said ''swim in the Lake of Fire'' I didn't mean you could actually stay a float. Just that you will be in a literal ocean of fire.

 

[Lisa Simpson]

This is just mean

You all know by now that he doesn't get the subtle humor.

If you tease him, you should then post an explanation

He's confused enough as it is

:grumble: take away all my fun, why don't you.

1inC--

If you want to learn about homeopathy, find one of Geni's posts. There will be a link in his sig line. Follow it.

 

[Z]

You must scream Jesus's name when you think you are having a supernatural experience and if it continues it's God put if it leaves it's Satan. Calling up God is not enough you must use the power of the name Jesus to validate it. Calling upon God could also summon Satan. Remember he is a trickster and this is how he does it. Preachers say Satan's favorite time to attack is during prayer. He loves to confuse. The power is in the name Jesus.

Wow - that proves it! Sex is a God-given supernatural experience! I scream "Jesus!" at the top of my lungs, and the supernatural experience just keeps flowing!

Thanks, 1inC, for finally giving us something useful.

 

[Cosmo]

Ok, i think I got it now

"Jesus" is the safe word

Haha! And remember...no marks above the neck, please. I have classes tomorrow.

 

[Operaider]

Haha! And remember...no marks above the neck, please. I have classes tomorrow.

I was wondering if anyone would get that

 

[1inChrist]

So you can never be sure of anything since everything might be a trick. Including everything you've been learnin' in that garage, huh?

No because Jesus is called upon all the time during the the Pastor's sermon.

 

[Marquis de Carabas]

When I said ''swim in the Lake of Fire'' I didn't mean you could actually stay a float. Just that you will be in a literal ocean of fire.

Thanks for clearing that up. Can I walk along the ocean floor? Are there vents there with worms swimming around that escaped from Underhell?

 

[crimresearch]

Still ignoring the Quaker question, the Lilith question, and of course this:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And yet you posted that the way to salvation was to repent before God, and denied that accepting Jesus was The Way...you called that an incorrect interpretation of the Bible...

http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/showthread....40&pagenumber=3

You were specifically asked about the Way to salvation,

Quote Bruce:
"Guess you'll be burning in hell with the rest of us."

and you replied:
Originally posted by 1inChrist
"Nope I have already repented. This is the true Glory of the Lord. When you Sin you can repent to Him and He forgives you. "

I asked you repeatedly if you knew that the way to salvation was to accept Christ instead of just repenting,

Originally posted by crimresearch:
"Repenting of your sins to God is NOT the requirement that will save you from burning in hell, according to the Bible that you claim to be supporting. Many have repented of their sins to God and perished.
One more time, "starts with a 'J'...."

"...according to Scripture, Jesus is the Savior, God is his father, the Creator...".

YOUR reply:
I know the Bible. Your interpretation of everything is wrong.

Even when confronted with the literal word of the Bible, you remained adamant...

Quote crimresearch:
"LOL!!! You are so busted...John 3:16 (the 'J' I've been telling you to look for) is the 'wrong interpretation' for redemption?
I'm sure you'll be able to back THAT one up with some expert citations, won't you?"

** Crickets.....chirp....chirp...**
__________________________________________________

 

[Operaider]

No because Jesus is called upon all the time during the the Pastor's sermon.

I know he didn't get it

{edited to add}
Or maybe he did

 

[1inChrist]

Also remember that once you have a relationship with him the more times goes on the more the relationship develops and you start to know God and can automatically tell when it's Satan trying to trick you. I still call on Jesus to be sure anyway but I'm usually correct about who it is.

 

[Marquis de Carabas]

No because Jesus is called upon all the time during the the Pastor's sermon.

The preacher should call on someone else. It makes the other students feel stupid if one kid gets all the attention.

 

[Z]

Did you catch the trick here, Ladies and Gentlemen? Satan has given us this modern name, Jesus, to refer to Yeshua ben-Yosef. Since we're not actually calling out JESUS' name - not His proper name - we're not protected from the treachery of Satan.

BTW - why wouldn't screaming GOD work BETTER than screaming JESUS? Is Junior more powerful than Big Daddy?

 

[DarkMagician]

This is a sign I have too much free time.

1 inCh rist, 1st level Troll Cleric
Hit Dice: 7d8+24 (55 hp)
Initiative: -1 (Dex)
Armor Class: 14 (-1 size, -1 Dex, +5 natural, +1 thick head)
Base Attack, Grapple: +4/+11
Attack: Claw +6 melee (1d6+3)
Full Attack: 2 claws +6 melee (1d6+3) and bite +1 melee (1d6+1)
Face/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Rend 2d6+4, rebuke undead,
Special Qualities: Blurred darkvision 90 ft. Low-light vision, regeneration 5, scent (negated by own odor), spell delusion.
Saves: Fort +10, Ref +1, Will +1
Abilities: Str 17, Dex 9, Con 17, Int 3, Wis 5, Cha 3.
Skills: Listen +3, Spot +4
Feats: Diehard, Iron Will, Toughness
Environment: Discussion boards
Organization: Solitary, family (1 plus 1-11 commoners, and 2 2nd-level commoner parents) or garage (1-10 plus 1 2nd-level cleric)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: Standard (no unchristian)
Alignment: Lawful stupid
Advancement: What advancement?
Level Adjustment: +4

The dense 1 inCh rist takes up levels in Cleric without knowing how to use the abilities. His inability to know when he has lost an argument just adds to his annoyance. He constantly believes he has access to Cleric spells that he can't use in the first place. He also has the ability to rebuke undead, which he believes can revive long dead arguments, as he constantly tries.

Rend (Ex): If 1 inCh rist hits with both claw attacks, it latches onto the body and tears the flesh. This attack automatically deals an additional 2d6+4 points of damage.

Regeneration (Ex): Fire and acid deal normal damage to 1 inCh rist.
If 1 inCh rist loses a vital part of his argument, the lost portion regrows in 3d6 minutes. The creature must websurf until this happens.

Spell Delusion (Ex): 1 inCh rist will constantly act as if he can use spells, even though he can't. During each round of an encounter, he has a 50% chance of trying to cast a spell. This act provokes an attack of opportunity, as casting a spell usually does.

Cleric Spells: None (incapable of using Cleric spells): Diety: Yahweh. Domains: Law and (hot) Air

 

[Marquis de Carabas]

Also remember that once you have a relationship with him the more times goes on the more the relationship develops and you start to know God and can automatically tell when it's Satan trying to trick you. I still call on Jesus to be sure anyway but I'm usually correct about who it is.

So you have a deep relationship with Jesus? I mean, really? You two are close?