Attention, NWO

[JoeyDonuts]

Ummm...guys? I think I may have left a wakeboard out there last time we did a "Reduced Gravity Watersports n' Barbecue" weekend at the subterranean Luna facility.

 

[LashL]

Ummm...guys? I think I may have left a wakeboard out there last time we did a "Reduced Gravity Watersports n' Barbecue" weekend at the subterranean Luna facility.

That little thing was yours? No wonder Hokulele's been laughing her butt off ever since the BBQ.

 

[JoeyDonuts]

It's possible I forgot to turn off the sprinklers, and the evidence of water the "scientists" have found is excessive runoff from the lovingly maintained 18-hole golf course we have on the dark side.

 

[NoZed Avenger]

It's possible I forgot to turn off the sprinklers, and the evidence of water the "scientists" have found is excessive runoff from the lovingly maintained 18-hole golf course we have on the dark side.

Jesus. Did you at least put the fake moonscape cover on the pool?

 

[JoeyDonuts]

Jesus. Did you at least put the fake moonscape cover on the pool?

It's on a timer. I'm not responsible for Accounts Payable on extra-planetary electricity bills. Talk to Beta Section for that - if you can get ahold of them. They've got "sensitivity training" this week, which I think means Sabrina gets to poke them with things.

 

[Sabrina]

It's on a timer. I'm not responsible for Accounts Payable on extra-planetary electricity bills. Talk to Beta Section for that - if you can get ahold of them. They've got "sensitivity training" this week, which I think means Sabrina gets to poke them with things.

Hey, I don't just get to poke them with things, you know!

I also get to insert them in various places. *evil grin*

 

[NoZed Avenger]

Hey, I don't just get to poke them with things, you know!

I also get to insert them in various places. *evil grin*

Every time you grin like that, I know it will be an extra dozen foms for me to fill out. "199a Next of Kin Notification"; "1-a23 Designation of Beneficiaries"; "300-12n Clean Up Requisition"; "300-13 Environmental Impact Statement for Clean Up Requisition"; etc. etc.

Sigh.

 

[Sabrina]

Every time you grin like that, I know it will be an extra dozen foms for me to fill out. "199a Next of Kin Notification"; "1-a23 Designation of Beneficiaries"; "300-12n Clean Up Requisition"; "300-13 Environmental Impact Statement for Clean Up Requisition"; etc. etc.

Sigh.

Awwww, poor baby. Maybe this will cheer you up. *presses a button on a remote control and Beta Section emerges from behind a curtain to give a full (involunary) performance of the Broadway musical Hairspray for NoZed's amusemet* Like it? I got the idea from the Ultima2 android Audible keeps around. Behavioral adjustment modification chips.

 

[ElMondoHummus]

Jesus, while you headquarters folk get to play piddle patter kissy-kissy with all your paperwork (AND SINCE WHEN DOES THE ALL POWERFULL ORGANIZATION IN THE WORLD FAIL TO GET WITH THE TIMES AND GO PAPERLESS, HUH??!!!), some of us down in the weeds are doing the real work of running the organization. You all ever heard of day-to-day chores, hmmm? Like paying off the military-industrial complex? Refilling the shark tank? KEEPING FREAKIN' YAY-HOOS FROM VIDEOTAPING OUR CONCENTRATION CAMPS??? Oh, nooooooooo, you haven't, have you? Playing Captain Kirk in the Pit of Reckoning while everyone else watching sings that dum dum dum DA DA DUM, DA DA DUM song... "disappearing" people (people, we determined years ago that disappearing=disintegration, hence the creation of that space weapon. Get with the program, folks! Don't just freakin' "concrete shoes" them!)... throwing Broadway spectacles at the push of a button, thus emptying out the entire R&D section 'cause they just want to practice for the Christmas play just one more time... (*grumble*)...

You guys got the cush jobs, I swear...

 

[NoZed Avenger]

You guys got the cush jobs, I swear...

Listen, buddy. We've all done time cleaning the shark tank; we've all had to endure the "monitor Alex Jones" duty -- I had him for a three week period when he had explosive gastritus, and let me tell you, I was happy to be back on the shark tank after that.

We've been promoted (or eaten by our lizard overlords, but they don't post as much); you'll have your chance to kill your superiors in ritual combat and and take their mantles and job titles, just like the rest of us.

Well, except for you. You've got shark tank duty until 2012. And we're starting a new program where we feed them Mexican.

 

[Audible Click]

Well, Mr. Hummus! I'll have you know that I am doing my part by plot gapping just about 24/7. Who do you think keeps the sheeple confused? Who do you think convinced them that You Tube was a credible research tool? Would you like to muck around in their tiny brains, trying to find a few working neurons? I barely have time to go shoe shopping with, my boss, Sabrina and you're complaining? -sashays back to the lab while admiring her new Manolo Blahnik high heels-

 

[Blue Mountain]

AND SINCE WHEN DOES THE ALL POWERFULL ORGANIZATION IN THE WORLD FAIL TO GET WITH THE TIMES AND GO PAPERLESS, HUH??!!!

We started the conversion project twenty years ago. We reached a milestone just this past week when the system design approval came through. Now we'll start building out the DOS-based (text mode 24x80) system on a network of XT class machines using 286s as the LAN servers. Still no final word yet on how we'll network things together, but 4 mb/s token-ring is the favored contender.

 

[Toke]

We started the conversion project twenty years ago. We reached a milestone just this past week when the system design approval came through. Now we'll start building out the DOS-based (text mode 24x80) system on a network of XT class machines using 286s as the LAN servers. Still no final word yet on how we'll network things together, but 4 mb/s token-ring is the favored contender.

This explains a lot of things.

 

[Sabrina]

Well, Mr. Hummus! I'll have you know that I am doing my part by plot gapping just about 24/7. Who do you think keeps the sheeple confused? Who do you think convinced them that You Tube was a credible research tool? Would you like to muck around in their tiny brains, trying to find a few working neurons? I barely have time to go shoe shopping with, my boss, Sabrina and you're complaining? -sashays back to the lab while admiring her new Manolo Blahnik high heels-

They're definitely you girl.

Do these Jimmy Choos make my legs look great or what? *admires her own shoes*

 

[Hokulele]

Listen, buddy. We've all done time cleaning the shark tank; we've all had to endure the "monitor Alex Jones" duty -- I had him for a three week period when he had explosive gastritus, and let me tell you, I was happy to be back on the shark tank after that.

We have?

Man, you really have no idea how to ace a job interview, do you.

 

[NoZed Avenger]

We have?

Man, you really have no idea how to ace a job interview, do you.

I'm not as limber after an old lifting injury.

 

[Hokulele]

Zing!

 

[arthwollipot]

I'm not as limber after an old lifting injury.

That's not how I remember it...

 

[JoeyDonuts]

Hey....You guys remember Dave from field section Upsilon-13? Little bastard's been busy.

http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/view/rawlings

 

[jaydeehess]

This just went out to a failed NWO agent. Let this be a lesson to all.

"Frank N. Furter, your mission is a failure, your lifestyle too extreme. We return to Transylvania, prepare the transit beam."