Hello? Uh, hello? Hello, Valdimir? Listen, I can't hear too well, do you suppose you could turn the music down just a little? A-ha, that's much better. Yeah, yes. Fine, I can hear you now, Vlad. Clear and plain and coming through fine. I'm coming through fine too, eh? Good, then. Well then, as you say, we're both coming through fine. Good. Well, it's good that you're fine, and - and I'm not so fine. I agree with you. It's great to be fine, but I am not. (Whimpers)
Now then, Vlad, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Google. The GOOGLE, Vlad. The search engine. Well now, what happened is, uh, a few of the results of our recent search, well, it seems Google went a little funny in the head. You know. Just a little funny. And uh, Google went and did a silly thing.
Well, I'll tell you what happened. He ordered his search engine...to say bad things about me.
Well, let me finish, Vlad. Let me finish, Vlad. Well, listen, how do you think I feel about it? Can you imagine how I feel about it, Vlad? Why do you think I'm calling you? Just to say hello?
Of course I like to speak to you! Of course I like to say hello! Not now, but any time, Vlad. I'm just calling up to tell you something terrible has happened.
It's a friendly call. Of course, it's a friendly call. Listen, if it wasn't friendly, you probably wouldn't have even got it. They will not be allowed to continue saying bad things about me. I am, I am positive, Vlad. Listen, I've been all over this with your Ambassador. It is not a trick. Well, I'll tell you. We'd like to give your hackers a complete rundown on the Google's cyber infrastructure.
Yes, I mean, if-if we're unable to reel them in with regulation, then, I'd say that, uh, well, uh, we're just gonna have to help you destroy them, Vlad. I know they're our boys. All right, well listen, now, who should we call? Who should we call, Vlad? The what, the People, you, sorry, you faded away there. The People's Cyber Defense Headquarters. Where is that, Vlady? In Omsk. Right. Yes. Oh, you'll call them first, will you? Uh, huh. Listen, do you happen to have the phone number on you, Vlad? What? I see. Just ask for Omsk information.
I'm sad too, Vlad. I'm bigly sad. All right, you're sadder than I am. But I am sad as well. It were my feelings that were hurt. I appreciate your empathy Vlad. I am as sad as you are, Vlady. Don't say that you're the more sad than I am because I am capable of being just as sad as you are. So we're both sad, all right? All right.