Transgender man gives birth

Ah, I see. But no, that isn't it.

He (theoretically) was attracted to the head+shoulders photo on the dating website and the chat that ensued.

In person he noticed that his date was all the wrong shape for a 'biological woman' and had rather a deep voice. Plus a hint of 5 o'clock shadow. Pretty soon the mistake became clear and he delicately asked his date "ytf didn't you tell me????. I've driven 40 miles for this poxy useless date with a person whose genitals are ************ male, and I can't even picture getting excited by that. Just be honest next time, ffs. Good luck, you moron!"

Do you think this is a problem that requires legislation?
 
But that does not reflect what some in the actual transgendered community is asking of us.

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/no-dont-have-to-tell-you-im-trans-before-dating-you

http://everydayfeminism.com/2016/12/dating-preferences-discriminatory/

http://www.theblaze.com/news/2017/0...-through-non-attraction-to-transgender-women/

So yeah, we are being asked to "work through" our issues with dating a transgendered person.

Are you saying trans-people should inform their dates that they are trans or risk being murdered?

If you go on a date and never discover that the person you are dating is trans, is that a problem for you? Maybe being trans is something personal that is only disclosed if things get a bit more serious?

Or, how about we stick to what people in this thread are arguing? I have no inclination to defend what random people on the internet are saying.
 
Uke2se seems to be saying that if you were attracted to the transwoman enough to get to the sex stage and then you get un-attracted when you see the penis or find out they were born male, then maybe somewhere in your heart of hearts, you're afraid that you are homosexual.

Maybe we've had it wrong all this time: Maybe sexual attraction is learned and not innately biological. Guess we should start up the conversion therapy again!

How does the fist paragraph lead to the second? That's some mental gymnastics right there.

Do you Think we should "start up" (as if it ever went away) the conversion therapy again? Do you think that's a good idea? I'd like to see you defend it.
 
Last edited:
Do you think this is a problem that requires legislation?

This dating scenario? Certainly not. It just requires some thoughtfulness for others, just as the dinner guest who has special dietary requirements shouldn't spring that fact on their host at the last minute.
 
This dating scenario? Certainly not. It just requires some thoughtfulness for others, just as the dinner guest who has special dietary requirements shouldn't spring that fact on their host at the last minute.

Anything else you'd like disclosed in a pre-date scenario? We can work out a contract.
 
Anything else you'd like disclosed in a pre-date scenario? We can work out a contract.

ETA: correction here (*) they probably want both

It isn't any *random* stuff though. It is about sex in the very end, and not gender. The crushing majority of people don't date a specific man/woman gender , they wish to date a specific sex (*)male-man/female-women. And such things should be disclosed and taken into accounts.

Do not forget also that dating, if pushed further lead to intimate situation, such situation which go to the intimate core of a person. And if the person understand she has been lied to and get the sex (again male/female - not gender) she is not striving for, she may react as if violated in their intimacy, betrayed, overcome by disgust, and unfortunately yes react violently. You keep forgetting that in dating there is TWO side of the equation, unless you are dating with the "widow thumb and her 4 sisters".

Pretending this is somehow special and should not be disclosed is blinding oneself to the reality on why somebody is dating somebody else.

I am speaking naturally only of dating-to-get-a-mate not "sexless" dating to get a friend.
 
Last edited:
Anything else you'd like disclosed in a pre-date scenario? We can work out a contract.

Just because you don't seem to care about the details of someone you might have sex with does not mean we should all feel that way. I have every right to know whether or not someone I might have sex with is a natural born woman with a vagina. Just like I have the right to know if they have any STDs, if they are currently in a relationship, etc.
 
ETA: correction here (*) they probably want both

It isn't any *random* stuff though. It is about sex in the very end, and not gender. The crushing majority of people don't date a specific man/woman gender , they wish to date a specific sex (*)male-man/female-women. And such things should be disclosed and taken into accounts.

Do not forget also that dating, if pushed further lead to intimate situation, such situation which go to the intimate core of a person. And if the person understand she has been lied to and get the sex (again male/female - not gender) she is not striving for, she may react as if violated in their intimacy, betrayed, overcome by disgust, and unfortunately yes react violently. You keep forgetting that in dating there is TWO side of the equation, unless you are dating with the "widow thumb and her 4 sisters".

Pretending this is somehow special and should not be disclosed is blinding oneself to the reality on why somebody is dating somebody else.

I am speaking naturally only of dating-to-get-a-mate not "sexless" dating to get a friend.

Should I read this to mean that the trans-gendered person is to blame if he/she gets murdered by someone who discovered bits where they didn't expect them?
 
Just because you don't seem to care about the details of someone you might have sex with does not mean we should all feel that way.

You misunderstand. I do care about details such as, is the person I'm dating a good fit for me? Do I find her funny? Am I attracted to her?

Does she have a dick doesn't really factor in until much later, and at that time, I expect the person to have told me. If not, I'll get over it and simply make my goodbyes. I do not expect someone to disclose personal details before we go on a first date.

I have every right to know whether or not someone I might have sex with is a natural born woman with a vagina.

Why?


Just like I have the right to know if they have any STDs, if they are currently in a relationship, etc.

Gender dysphoria is like STDs to you then?
 
Last edited:
Should I read this to mean that the trans-gendered person is to blame if he/she gets murdered by someone who discovered bits where they didn't expect them?

What a ludicrous question. You appear to be trying pretty hard to start a fight here.
 
What a ludicrous question. You appear to be trying pretty hard to start a fight here.

No, it's not ludicrous. The post makes it clear it should be expected that someone who feel fooled when discovering that the person they are about to get intimate with is transitioning turns violent. I simply wanted to ask the poster to clarify where the fault lies.


ETA: But I see now that I've been tricked into defending positions that aren't mine, and haven't previously been expressed in this thread. Maybe I should turn violent? After all, it's only expected when someone gets tricked, right?
 
Last edited:
Maybe being trans is something personal that is only disclosed if things get a bit more serious?

I think it should be disclosed very early on. I think any reasonable person would expect it to be a major turn off for many, and would rather be as open as possible around it.

Should I read this to mean that the trans-gendered person is to blame if he/she gets murdered by someone who discovered bits where they didn't expect them?

How can you even ask that question?
 
No, you really did. You directly compared the two.

No, he didn't. He made a parallel between two things you should know about a potential partner. That doesn't mean they are the same. If he had pointed out that you should know if your partner is in debt with the mafia, it doesn't mean that debt is like being trans. :rolleyes:
 
I'll make another summary of what we're talking about in this thread:

Please address a trans-gendered person with the pronoun of his/her choice. It's only polite.

Please allow a trans-gendered person to use the locker room/bathroom of the gender he/she is transitioning to.

If you find yourself on a date with a trans-gendered person and he/she didn't inform you before hand, please don't get violent. Simply ask why he/she didn't tell you, inform him/her that you aren't into them and say good bye.
 
No, you really did. You directly compared the two.

I also said that I have the right to know if they're in a relationship. Does this mean that I'm comparing being in a relationship to having gender dysphoria?

Are you intentionally misrepresenting what's being said here?
 
Last edited:

Back
Top Bottom