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May 21 Rapture Checklist

Foster Zygote

Dental Floss Tycoon
Foster Zygote
Joined
Jun 24, 2006
Messages
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These are Harold Camping's predictions for the rapture, which he assures us will occur on May 21, 2011. He also assures us that the universe will end on October 21, 2011.

1. World's worst earthquake.

2. All graves from whole of human history (all 13,000 years of it) will open scattering 130 centuries worth of bodies on the ground world wide.

3. The unsaved will see the approximately 200,000,000 saved (from all of human history) rise up to heaven.

4. From May 21 on, millions of people will die every day until October 21.

5. The universe will be destroyed by fire on October 21.

I, for one, will be sure to have my checklist handy so as to check off these events as they happen.
 
Foster Zygote said:
3. The unsaved will see the approximately 200,000,000 saved (from all of human history) rise up to heaven.
Click to expand...


That is a tiny percentage of all humans who ever lived.

Guess God was pretty poor at the creating bit, if the vast majority of his creations won't make it.
 
Some friends of ours are throwing a rapture party

Alas I will be rebuilding a server that day, so I'll miss the fun.

However I don't expect much to happen. Stewie will go back in time and change everything.
 
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Do the dead get replacement bodies? Or will there be a lot of skeletons, dessicated corpses and dust clouds walking around? And what about the really old dead whose constituent molecules have been integrated into the currently living?
And, for that matter, what about molecules that have been part of multiple people, who gets them?
We want answers.............
 
catsmate1 said:
Do the dead get replacement bodies? Or will there be a lot of skeletons, dessicated corpses and dust clouds walking around? And what about the really old dead whose constituent molecules have been integrated into the currently living?
And, for that matter, what about molecules that have been part of multiple people, who gets them?
We want answers.............
Click to expand...

Remember: double tap.
 
Lot of stereos and other appliances should be available at no cost.
 
Foster Zygote said:
These are Harold Camping's predictions for the rapture, which he assures us will occur on May 21, 2011. He also assures us that the universe will end on October 21, 2011.

1. World's worst earthquake.

2. All graves from whole of human history (all 13,000 years of it) will open scattering 130 centuries worth of bodies on the ground world wide.
3. The unsaved will see the approximately 200,000,000 saved (from all of human history) rise up to heaven.

4. From May 21 on, millions of people will die every day until October 21.

5. The universe will be destroyed by fire on October 21.

I, for one, will be sure to have my checklist handy so as to check off these events as they happen.
Click to expand...

I assume these graves are the 'tomb' type. How about the 'six feet under' type where there are bodies on top of bodies on top of bodies? How will they dig themselves out?
 
All these dead people...do they have social security numbers? Passports? ID of any kind?

They're screwed.
 
Foster Zygote said:
These are Harold Camping's predictions for the rapture, which he assures us will occur on May 21, 2011. He also assures us that the universe will end on October 21, 2011.
Click to expand...

He obviously does not accept Revelation as scripture. Wasn't the rapture supposed to be followed by a War between the good guys and the bad guys which lasts for years>

Norm
 
Foster Zygote said:
5. The universe will be destroyed by fire on October 21.
Click to expand...

Well crap! I have a fishing trip planned for October 21st. Last year it rained all week, the year before it was unseasonably cold, and now the universe is going to get destroyed by fire. I can't catch a break.
 
fromdownunder said:
He obviously does not accept Revelation as scripture. Wasn't the rapture supposed to be followed by a War between the good guys and the bad guys which lasts for years>

Norm
Click to expand...

Not only that, but there is supposed to be an Antichrist who will be leading the bad guys in that war.

I'll be very surprised when Camping announces who he thinks is the Antichrist.

Cheers
 
Remember folks, I'm praying that God will relent and delay this inconvenient event. He answered my prayer back in 1976 and the prayers of countless caring people throughout history who have reminded him that this destroy the universe thing is cruel and unnecessary.

Join me in prayer, Brethren and Sisteren!
We shall rejoice when our self-righteous, pious neighbors still have to go to church the Sunday morning after Saturday the 21st!

:yahoo
 
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