Jerry, that night, had piled every goddamn object in his house against the front door, like maybe 900 pounds of assorted crap, including couches and chairs and the refrigerator and TV set, and then told everybody that a giant superintelligent aphid from another planet was out there preparing to break in and git him. And more would be landing later on, even if he got this one. These extraterrestrial aphids were smarter by far than any humans, and would come directly through the walls if necessary, revealing their secret powers in such ways. To save himself as long as possible, he had to flood the house with cyanide gas, which he was prepared to do. How was he prepared to do that? He had already taped all the windows and doors airtight. He then proposed to turn on the water faucets in the kitchen and bathroom, flooding the house, saying that the hot water tank in the garage was filled with cyanide, not water. He had known this for a long time and was saving it for last, as a final defence. They would all die themselves, but at least it would keep the super-intelligent aphids out.
, though fun.
ing idiot, you can't fly if you jump off the roof of this building." and "no, you 