Bigfoot = Yeh! Or Neh!

I have a really bad headache. It started right about:

"Bigfoot, as I can determine, is of the "Alein " species. The head has most of the features of a pig.......I've coined the name "PIGI" for this "being"."
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As I read further it developed into a migraine. When I came to the Mars and Moon section, my nose started to bleed. It was at this point that i realized, Pigfoot is a scanner.
 
I did a little more research on the Bessie Smith connection, and have found astonishing new evidence that Bigfoot is not only real, but may be a connoisseur of fine blues!

As you know, the lyrics of those old acoustic-recorded 78's are kind of hard to make out sometimes, but with the help of cutting edge technology I believe I have discovered that one of Bessie's famous recordings has been misinterpreted for many years. I hereby append the corrected version:


GIMME A BIGFOOT (AND A BOTTLE OF BEER)

Out in Skookum on a Saturday night
When the skeptics get together, it's just too tight.
They all gather at the trackway rut
And all they do is tut tut tut.

But Ol' Hannah Brown, from way cross town
Pulls out her plaster and throws it on down.
Just at the break of day,
You could hear old Hannah say

I wanna bigfoot and a bottle of beer.
Send me Patty, cos I don't care
that she smells kinda funky,
got a face like a monkey,
them skeptics got me down.

Don' need to chase when you'd rather sleep,
And he'll stomp you to death with them big ol'feet.
Check all your cameras and your guns,
They won't be loaded when the big guy comes.

I wanna bigfoot and a bottle of beer
Won't chase him cause I don't dare oh no
Send me cos I don't dare

[trumpet solo here: on original this was exquisitely played by Louis "Squatchmo" Armstrong]

I wanna bigfoot and a bottle of beer;
Send me Patty, cos I don't dare.
I feel just like sittin' around.
Give the man with the wooden feet a drink,
Cause he brought me down.

He's got rhythm when he stomps his feet,
A mid tarsal break dancer hot and sweet.
Check all your cameras check your guns.
Ain't gonna be ready if the bigfoot comes.

I wanna bigfoot and a bottle of beer;
Send me cos I don't dare oh no,
Send me cos I don't dare.

bessie and squatchmo.jpg
 
What I particularly love is the fact that no two bigfoot people here can agree about exactly what bigfoot is. Historian claims that they're invisible, extradimensional creatures, Teaberryeagle says that they're porcine aliens, someone else says that they're something else.

Surely if they really existed, people would agree on such fundamental properties?
 
Whoever managed to read that entire thing. My hat's off to you. My head exploded after the sixth sentence. Only the little bit of brainstem left attached to my spinal cord is allowing my corpse to reflexively type a response.
 
TEABERRYEAGLE (and Historian if he is out there anyplace) - I need an answer to my dual challange by days end...or I'll declare myself the victor over the cowardly, whimpy, dinggleberry butt "Mighty One". Yeah, that's right....I'm laughing at BF, at what a joke it is..."Mighty One", in terms of smelling bad maybe.

Brick "The Dread Pirate Roberts" Locknar, no one of consequence.
 
You know, I've heard all my life about horrific or strange or unbelievable things that would happen "when pigs fly." If both teaberryeagle and historian are right, we're in for a whole lot more weirdness!
 
And y'all thought CF was a little off. At least he kept you intrested for 28 pages. Oh if ya do happen to get one if them thar Big Foot Pigis I'll bring the "John Boy and Billy Grill'n sauce"!!!!
 
ThunderFoot said:
And y'all thought CF was a little off. At least he kept you intrested for 28 pages. Oh if ya do happen to get one if them thar Big Foot Pigis I'll bring the "John Boy and Billy Grill'n sauce"!!!!
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I want to host the First Annual JREF Pigfoot Jamboree and Barbecue, but somebody else will have to bring the Pigfoot. And the jam.
 
ThunderFoot said:
And y'all thought CF was a little off. At least he kept you interested for 28 pages. Oh if ya do happen to get one if them thar Big Foot Pigis I'll bring the "John Boy and Billy Grill'n sauce"!!!!
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If you want to read some really fascinating insight into the abortion of reason that occurs in the mind of a lunatic, I suggest you look up Historian's thread. It really is morbidly fascinating to read. Kinda like watching a train wreck.
 
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Locknar said:
TEABERRYEAGLE (and Historian if he is out there anyplace) - I need an answer to my dual challange by days end...or I'll declare myself the victor over the cowardly, whimpy, dinggleberry butt "Mighty One". Yeah, that's right....I'm laughing at BF, at what a joke it is..."Mighty One", in terms of smelling bad maybe.

Brick "The Dread Pirate Roberts" Locknar, no one of consequence.
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Well...following Historians advice, I went out last night & again this morning, being as disrespectful as possible...no results.

BF was a no show...to scared to face me in a duel.

TEABERRYEAGLE/Historian, anytime the stinky one wants a rematch lemme know.
 
You need a pig. They like to throw pigs.

Try to get a picture of bigfoot throwing a pig for me.

That would be much more impressive than a burnt stump with eyes from Wetappo Creek.
 
L
Rasmus55 said:
Speaking of big-foot and related phenomena, check out yahoo news today. It appears that a hunter in Pa who was using remote photography got a picture of an interesting looking animal. He claimed he was using the remote camera to take snapshots of deer to confirm whether that spot was good for hunting. Instead, he got a picture of something that has a very ape-like appearance. The Pa wildlife authorities, however, said this sort of picture was actually more common than people might suspect. They labeled it a bear with very bad mange. I wonder how many other alleged "big foot" sightings are nothing more than malnurished bears with mange or other skin problems. Probably most of them, other than the frauds of course. I'm sure the big-foot lovers out there will be all over this one despite the explanation.
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ORIGINAL REPLY BY HARRY W. McCORMACK (TEABERRYEAGLE)

LET ME BE THE FIRST TO SHOW YOU A REAL "BIGFOOT'/SASQUATCH".......They are definitely "Poo=pooing" those pics. he took, but the last laugh will be on all the disbelievers...these photos. you're talking about are referred to as the "Jacob's Beast", made in Pennsylvania.

Everyone, alll the experts that is, can't "see-the-forest-for-the-trees", because I DISCOVERED A REAL "HONEST-TO-GOODNESS" --"BIGFOOT/SASQUATCH" for you in his photos.......I reported this in other threads, but upon analyzing his photos, here's exactly what he has:

PHOTO NO. 1 There are two bear cubs......everyoe accepts this......
PHOTO NO. 2 There is the "BEING"........bent over and reaching for something at a tree trunk.......
PHOTO NO. 3 There is the "BEING"........sitting at the base of the tree..

HERE'S YOUR PROOF THAT IT IS A BF/SAS........IN PHOTO NO. 2, THERE IS A COZY LITTLE "BABY"/"JUVENILE" LYING IN A FUR LINED BASKET/CRADLE....IN PLAIN VIEW, BUT ALONG THE BOTTOM EDGE OF THE PHOTO.......YOUR FIRST LOOK AT THE FACE OF A REAL "BIGFOOT/SASQUATCH"..........I HAVE MADE YOUR FIRST DISCOVERY.......OVERLOOKED BY EVERYONE, BECAUSE THEY WERE CONCENTRATING ON THE ADULT.....AND, IN PHOTO NO. 3.....SHE IS SITTING AT THE BASE OF THE TREE.....NURSING ONE BABY WHILE THE SECOND IS STILL SNOOZING IN THE "FUR-LINED" BASKET.......BASKET???........PUTS A DIFFERENT LIGHT ON WHAT THE "BEING "IS, HUH? AND, MY THEORY, THAT THEY ARE "PIG" LIKE "BEINGS" CAN ALSO BE SEEN IN THE PHOTO NO. 3, AS THE "CLOVEN HOOFS" ARE READILY VISIBLE......JUST LOOK AT THE LEG TO THE RIGHT AND THE ONE PROTRUDING FORWARD......SHE IS BALANCING HERSELF WITH HER RIGHT ARM.........HOPE YOU WILL NOW GIVE ME THE CREDIT AND RECOGNITION FOR THIS WORLD SHATTERING DISCOVERY....THANKS, harry
 
Well I'm convinced, everything that I spent the last 7 years of my life studying is wrong. Space pigs with crossbows did it. No way us idiot humans could ever build anything right.

Honestly show me one thing that humans are supposedly responsible for creating that couldn't be more logically attributed to space pigs. Have you ever had a creative thought? Cause I sure as hell haven't. Its impossible.

All those years on anthropology... wasted. Should have been researching pigs.

Ah well at least I'm still young. There's still TIME!!!!111!!?a!

I will unlock "The Secret of the Space Pigs!" ©
 
TEABERRYEAGLE said:
I HAVE MADE YOUR FIRST DISCOVERY.......(snip)HOPE YOU WILL NOW GIVE ME THE CREDIT AND RECOGNITION FOR THIS WORLD SHATTERING DISCOVERY....THANKS, harry
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Your discovery is very important, TBE. Have you told any family members or friends about the space pigs?

300px-PIS.jpg
 
Bigfoot = Yeh? Or Neh?..........the Yeh's Have It

Check "pigi" At My Profile............then Make Your Comments.......i Couldn't Keep Up With All Of Them Below......sorry I Didn't Get To Answer You Indivually..........teaberryeagle.........showed The World
 
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