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Why is homosexuality wrong?

blobru said:
(seriously, VM & not JC!? huh, was news to me; thx for the rewind.)
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Yeah, it's an odd little bit of dogma. As I've had it explained to me, the mother of Jesus had to be perfect. But humans are born imperfect because of Original Sin. So Mary had to be born without it, so she had to be conceived immaculately.

OK, so maybe explained was a bit too strong a term...
 
So I guess all of us regular human people that don't have superpower divine DNA should just be ashamed of our mothers because they were not virgins and therefore somehow inferior.

When a guy is no longer a virgin, it's slaps on the back and "way to go dude", unless of course he had sex with another guy. When a woman is no longer a virgin her trade-in value takes a big hit. That's the glory of Judeo-Christian sexism.
 
DoubtingStephen said:
snippley

When a guy is no longer a virgin, it's slaps on the back and "way to go dude", unless of course he had sex with another guy. When a woman is no longer a virgin her trade-in value takes a big hit. That's the glory of Judeo-Christian sexism.
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Whooo. Again, so thankful I'm still a virgin.
 
FSM said:
Sodomy doesn't count on that, right?
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Sodomy doesn't count unless there are at least 2 guys involved. Obviously 2 women can't have sex with each other, without the male bits involved it simply does not present a challenge to the patriarchal power structure. And if a man and a woman are having sex anyone can see that is much too conventional to qualify as sodomy, no matter where he, you know, puts it.

Hardly any cities filled with innocent women and children have ever been destroyed by a loving, vengeful, merciful deity because of heterosexual sodomy. It just does not measure up on the pissing off deities scale.

I recommend gay guys if you really want to make the Baby Jesus cry. If you get 3 you can do the Three Wise Men routine. Please don't ask for specific details on the Three Wise Men routine, this board is open to the public.

Of course for the ultimate in sodomy hedonism you'll need at least 20 feet of stout rope and a frightened Fundamentalist homophobe, Woof! Now that's what I call recruiting
 
Details:

20 feet of stout rope,
Five gay guys (We called it the Nickle Defense and everyone wore shoulder pads and helmets and nothing else...),
My ear, my big toe, my left nostril and a toothpick,
Twenty footballs,
Thirteen vats of EVIL lubricant,
A purple glow-in-the-dark ball gag,

and

some licorice. Black.



See? Still a virgin.
 
FSM said:
Details:

20 feet of stout rope,
Five gay guys (We called it the Nickle Defense and everyone wore shoulder pads and helmets and nothing else...),
My ear, my big toe, my left nostril and a toothpick,
Twenty footballs,
Thirteen vats of EVIL lubricant,
A purple glow-in-the-dark ball gag,

and

some licorice. Black.



See? Still a virgin.
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I love licorice!
 
You can have all the licorice you want if you manage to bring one frightened Fundamentalist homophobe to our next Nickle Defense party. Let him know he needs to bring 1 pair of silver stilettos and pompoms.

You get to be the the coach. Bring your whistle.
 
OK, but it can't be the kind of licorice one usually sees for sale as ropes or twisters, that stuff all has wheat in it, and my immune system considers wheat to be an invading organism. I do not do wheat. Queer stuff, sure, but no wheat.

We need to get real, honest to goodness licorice with licorice in it and no wheat. That's not always easy in the USA.

I'll bring the homosexuality :D
 
And I'll bring the voyeurism.



And some Fritos. I love Fritos. No wheat!
 
FSM said:
You can have all the licorice you want if you manage to bring one frightened Fundamentalist homophobe to our next Nickle Defense party. Let him know he needs to bring 1 pair of silver stilettos and pompoms.

You get to be the the coach. Bring your whistle.
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I'm trying to picture Xenon (actually I can't picture Xenon at all as a human person) but trying anyway, perhaps in a nice choirboy costume. Gown and surplice. Stephen can play the naughty priest.

Which reminds me of an old joke:

A gay man has a catholic friend who keeps trying to "save" him. Finally, the catholic manages to get his friend to come to mass on a special holy day when the bishop is in town, in hope that the pomp and glory and such will be a better sell. All goes well until the bishop comes up the aisle, swinging his censer. The gay guy leans out and says, "Love your hat, love your dress, but you know, your purse is on fire!"
 
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