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Religious Repellant

I find a lot of the replies are in reaction to the fact that being imposed upon by religious salesmen is sufficiently rude and preumptuous even on the first pass that a little smugness in the retort might be justified.

Another way of looking at this is that somebody is taking time out of their day with the goal of helping you save your eternal soul. The effort might be for naught in my case but still I can't get all that annoyed at somebody that's making the effort.

LawnOven asked where people live that have so many interactions with relgious proselytizers. I live in Orange County, CA (davefoc = dave From Orange County). I didn't have a very good idea how many times a religous proselytizer has approached me, but my guess was something like twice a year for most of my adult life or about 100 times. Mostly Jehovah's witnesses I think with some mormons as well.
 
Bed-bug crazy act works for me every time.
"Thank-you, but I don't need your religion. God speaks directly to me."
They usually go off on some spiel, but I don't let 'em speak for more than a few seconds before I look up to the right, like I just heard something. I furrow my brow, and say "No, not yet."

If they're brave enough to ask what I've just 'heard', I act like I don't wanna tell 'em at first. They may persist, to which I respond, "God told me I may have to skin you alive."

It's not a threat, so you're pretty safe with that.
 
Acting insane might not work as well as it seems at first. After all, all religions and philosophies have their share of incurable nutcases, and some of these have probably been converted, which means someone out there is converting lunatics. And why not? No opinion, religious or not, would be the same without all these insane people backing it up.

"God tells you to skin people alive? You'll fit right in!" :D

Since I very rarely get into conversations with total strangers about religion (I must be living in one of those places where you don't, like LawnOven), I take every opportunity to discuss these questions with them when approached. I usually get so much into it that people are bored or scared off after a while without me having to consciously attempting to drive them away.

However, I do have a cousin who has had some trouble with Jehova's Witnesses. Appearently, some of his friends thought it was a great joke to direct such people to him by subtle remarks about that he may be more interested in their message. Of course, these tactics can also be used to get rid of them, though you might not get very popular with the people you direct them too. ;)
 
The problem with the "bed-bug crazy" response is that they walk away feeling like they are the more rational ones. They still get some level of positive reinforcement of their beliefs. If you politely and rationally present a counter belief, they walk away with some doubt even if they don't admit it.
 
Alot of the replies seem to be aimed at making you feel smug whilst dismissing the zelot. I find Meadmakers solution to be the bast, just say you are not interested, if they persist, then get rude.
I know it's annoying to be pestered by these people, and it would be nice to always have a 'zinger' to get them with, but most of the time it's just not worth it.

I agree. The only distinction I would make is how you characterize Meadmaker's solution. I agree that a polite "No, thank you. I'm not interested," is the most polite, straightforward, and unambiguous message. I do not believe it is necessary to get rude if they persist, however. For instance, I do not think hanging up on a telemarketer who continues talking after I have ended the conversation with the above response is rude. That person is nearly always mindlessly following a script and not paying heed to your actual communication. What you are telling them is "Go away and bother me no more." When they persist, it is perfectly acceptable in my opinion to hang up the phone. They are the ones being rude by persisting when you have clearly communicated that you do not wish to be bothered with their message.

Similarly, when someone does the same in person and the intruder into your personal space and affairs persists in troubling you, it is not necessarily rude to get firm with the intruder and change your tone a bit. "I already told you I'm not interested, now please leave me alone," is not rude. Getting up and moving to a different location is not rude. Coldcocking the person and putting him on the ground might be a bit much.

The funniest dismmisal I ever saw was when a couple came to the door and my dad answered..

"Hello, we're from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints." they said,
to which my dad replied "Well, we all have our cross to bear." smiled and closed the door.

:)

That's perfect. Your father has a brilliant wit.

AS
 
Well, I've used it twice (when I was feeling ornery) and it worked both times. Usually I'll actually talk to 'em and try to take the p!$$ out of their arguments using logic. I once had a Mormon try to save me over the phone and I debated him until he hung up on me!
 
May have been rude, but when I was approached the third time in a week at an airport, I just began muttering "I don't know........I don't know........I don't know....." followed by complete silence. When he bit and asked what I meant, I said "I don't know whether to be pi$$ed off because you think I'm stupid enough to believe that load of crap (referring to the bible in his hands) or to pity you because you are stupid enough to believe it.". Amazingly enough, this wasn't enough to get rid of him.:(
 
ask upchurch for some assistance in cutting off conversation. i see no need to address this myself.
 
And politely saying "I don't want to talk about religion" hasn't been working which is why I am in search of a repellant.

That's because you're not following through. What's worked best for me is to say, "No thank you," and then to either studiously ignore them (works best when you have a book), or get up and walk away. Unless you have some absolutely compelling reason to be in that spot for the next 5 minutes, there's no reason to stay there if someone's bugging you.*

If you're just too polite to do either of those, then I strongly recommend you start learning a lot about responses to evangelists. There is a wealth of information on line that can help you. Getting in to a conversation (especially if you debate politely) may actually produce something useful. (If nothing else than to pass the time).

* A polite way to do this is to accept whatever literature they're handing out, say "thank you, I'll think about it", and then leave.

Marc
 
A polite way to do this is to accept whatever literature they're handing out, say "thank you, I'll think about it", and then leave.

I remember trying that once in an airport 25 years ago. I think it was a Hare Krishna. He wanted to give me a book to enlighten me, out of the goodness of his heart. Though he would accept a donation if I liked. I genuinely was interested in his beliefs, though there was close to zero chance I'd so believe myself.

But I told him that I didn't have any money with me to give. And this, as it happened, was the truth. I was on my way home and my wallet was empty. Zip. Absolutely nothing.

Well, he ran down a sliding scale of "suggested" contributions, then finally said something about the cost of printing, and ultimately took the book back!

Some "gift". Some concern for my "enlightenment".
 
Another way of looking at this is that somebody is taking time out of their day with the goal of helping you save your eternal soul. The effort might be for naught in my case but still I can't get all that annoyed at somebody that's making the effort.

I agree, that is a reasonable way to look at it.

But another way to look at it, is someone is trying to take time out of my day to increase the membership in their cult, thereby increasing its money and power.
 
Here's something that might be useful - it happened to a friend of mine some years ago, when he decided to become a computer salesman.

He visited a company with the senior salesman who was training him, and they were taken to the office of the company's big boss.

The senior salesguy had just started his spiel, when the boss opened a desk draw, took out a spray can and sprayed it into the room.

The senior salesguy paused, not really knowing what was happening, but continued his prepared speech.

Again, the boss sprayed the room, but this time turned the can around so that they two salesguys could see the name on the can - it read "Bull**** repellant".

My friend decided on a change of career after this, but it occurred to me that it might help get rid of unwanted enlightenment, don't you think?

And it probably doesn't even have to be pepper spray :)

YBW
 
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It's funny, this never happens to me! I couldn't tell you why!! I basically look like a cross between a James Bond Bad Guy (naturally bald, goatee, broad shoulders, big) and a Harvard professor (jacket with patches, cords, sweater). But no one ever does this to me. I can be walking across campus and actually see people handing out Bibles or literature and they'll never even make eye contact. Maybe it's that jacket with patches - I think it just telegraphs "atheist" or something. Try getting one!!

When I was an undegrand I lived down from a Mormon church. I got door knocked at least once a day from either God's Own Cycle Club, the Scientologists, or somebody else. I put a "NO SOLICITING" sign on the door and they kept coming; "Salvation isn't soliciting!!" Then I made up a sign that looked very professional which read: "PLEASE USE OTHER GOD" and it had an arrow pointing off indiscriminately towards the upper left. No one ever knocked again.
 

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