Thats a very good point. Thank you Butter.
Sure thing.
Along my own way, it also helped me to think about how MANY human events and developments completely preceded the earliest advent of Christianity. Aristotle lived his entire influential life 300 years before the generally accepted birth of Christ time period. He was quite anti-mysticism, for what it's worth. His philosophical predecessors, such as Plato, were not as opposed to mysticism in general, but their methods of spiritual thinking were/are completely incompatible with later Christian teachings. If you want to go down a rabbit hole that might help you instead of intensifying your angst, subjects like what I've just described would be more beneficial to you.
Read about how evidence of written mathematics dates back to ancient Sumeria, or how Archimedes developed stuff like the hydrostatic principle, again, hundreds of years before Christianity or the proto-Vatican entities were ever a thing. Hellenic astronomy was well aware of the Earth's roundness by the 3rd century BC, lmao (which makes stuff like the second Genesis creation myth about the "dome" over an apparently flat earth seem even sillier).
I don't know if people always think about Christianity in those kinds of terms, conceiving how much truly went on before it (or even early shades of Yahweh) ever showed up. Why would God wait so long to reveal anything about himself if knowing him is so important? People were clearly kicking along just fine without him. Did all those Greeks and Sumerians just... never have a chance to go to heaven?
We can't say they were simpler people who couldn't comprehend God. They comprehended things people today often struggle to comprehend - complex philosophy, math, astronomy, etc. They had their own religions and systems of rule. They were dumbasses about many things too, obviously, but that doesn't negate any part of my point (which may be waxing a bit rhapsodic by now).
Maybe that kind of thinking won't have as profound an effect on you as it did on me, but I figured I'd suggest it. For me, it really demystified that feeling of Christianity/Catholicism as a "scary ancient mystery," which is a feeling that can be hard to shake even when one has stopped believing. But it clearly wasn't that. It was just a cult that got really, REALLY popular, as well as a spin-off of the first definitive monotheistic religion to ever develop (Judaism).
I don't know what the true nature of reality is, and I hesitate to speak in absolutes more and more the older I get. But I feel I can absolutely say that you do not need to worry about this particular crap.