Irrational fears

[jezzedout]

Lots of times I find that if I talk about something outloud to others, like if I say outloud that I'm going to do something, I am more inclined to do it.

Agree Truth. Talking about something also tends to demystify it. Beyond all the great advice I've gained from this thread, just putting my thoughts out there has been quite beneficial in terms of motivating me to take action.

 

[TruthBeTold]

Cool!!

I wish I hadn't told anyone I was going to clean the windows this week!!


I think that the foundation of MOST fears is death.
If some people come to terms with that, they can get over the fear.
I emphasize some.

I refuse to believe that THE ONE thing EVERY human has in common (death) can be a bad thing.
Not that I want to find out any time soon.

 

[kerikiwi]

I sense you're just joking. Perhaps I just hope you're joking. If not, simply out of curiosity... what do you have in mind?

Only partly joking.
The dog simply wanted to run away every time the cattle galloped up to the fence, as cattle do. So first the dog has to sit at a distance and as soon as the cattle approach, the dog is rewarded. If the dog moves away, no reward. Then the behaviour is gradually modified: reward for sitting still, but no reward for looking away. Reward for looking at the cattle. Reward for walking towards the cattle. Reward for approaching the fence. Reward for sniffing noses with the cattle (we haven't got that far yet)
All unwanted behaviour is ignored or distracted, but not rewarded, which is something people often unintentionally do, by soothing fear. You know the kind of thing :"oh,poor dog, you're scared. Pat,pat,pat. There, see how you get nice things for being scared!"
Similarly with the horse and big trucks.
Reward for walking up to stationary, silent truck, then walking up to stationary truck with engine running. Brave behaviour: reward, frightened behaviour: no reward. Running away is a reward, both with the dog running from the cattle and the horse running from the truck.
The horse now totally ignores all the trucks and farm machinery which pass as we meander along the road.

 

[wolfgirl]

You sure you're not claustrophobic? Those tram cars are mighty cramped!

I think I have a touch of claustrophobia, but it's pretty mild compared to the height thing. If that tram car was going in a straight line, I would've felt anxious and uncomfortable and wanting it to be over quickly, but I wouldn't have cried!

 

[JoeTheJuggler]

I think I have a touch of claustrophobia, but it's pretty mild compared to the height thing. If that tram car was going in a straight line, I would've felt anxious and uncomfortable and wanting it to be over quickly, but I wouldn't have cried!

They're sort of the opposite of the glass elevator, though. But yes, the sideways motion (it's basically a little train rolling on tracks) is disconcerting.

You felt OK up top, though? The curved floor is weird, but the windows are still relatively small and you're fully enclosed (not like an observation deck on skyscraper).

 

[jezzedout]

They're sort of the opposite of the glass elevator, though. But yes, the sideways motion (it's basically a little train rolling on tracks) is disconcerting.

You felt OK up top, though? The curved floor is weird, but the windows are still relatively small and you're fully enclosed (not like an observation deck on skyscraper).

I realize Joe directed this question to Wolfgirl, but...

I visited the St. Louis Arch in the late 80s, long before I ever had any real height-related issues. I'm not at all claustrophic, so I found the elevators to be more of a curiosity than anything else. I may be wrong, but I think that elevator system and the fact that the cars are able to move along a curved track make it the only one of its kind in the world, or at least it was at that time.

Anyway... while I was at the top of the Arch, in the observation area, someone suggested to me to lean out into the windows (which are slanted outwards), then raise my arms up to the side like I'm flying. Looking down from that position, feeling the sway of the Arch, was the first time ever that I felt afraid of heights. I very promptly caught the next elevator down, leaving the friend I was with behind to catch up with me later. I felt like a total wimp

 

[wolfgirl]

They're sort of the opposite of the glass elevator, though. But yes, the sideways motion (it's basically a little train rolling on tracks) is disconcerting.

You felt OK up top, though? The curved floor is weird, but the windows are still relatively small and you're fully enclosed (not like an observation deck on skyscraper).

No, I didn't feel OK up top at all. The first time I went up was the first time my husband had experienced my fear of heights. I don't think he "got it" before then. We got up there, and I stood in the very dead center of the walkway, refusing to look out the windows, and then I headed back to the elevator area to get the heck out of there. My husband said that I looked as white as a ghost!

 

[wolfgirl]

Anyway... while I was at the top of the Arch, in the observation area, someone suggested to me to lean out into the windows (which are slanted outwards), then raise my arms up to the side like I'm flying. Looking down from that position, feeling the sway of the Arch, was the first time ever that I felt afraid of heights. I very promptly caught the next elevator down, leaving the friend I was with behind to catch up with me later. I felt like a total wimp

The second time I went up the Arch was with some family members that had come over to visit from England, one of whom was a three-year-old nephew. He did that leaning-out-into-the-window thing, and I almost died just watching him! He thought it was great fun!

And yeah, the swaying doesn't help...