I will be asked where I get my morals.

I'm too late to contribute, but I'm interested in hearing the outcome. In particular, I predict that Ceritus's former girlfriend might want to deny visitation because he's an atheist, but that won't come up in court. Her lawyer will know that the court couldn't consider the religion (or lack of) as a basis of awarding visitation (and just visitation I gather, not even custody).

So the question of where Ceritus gets his morals will not be asked. That's my prediction.

But I do have an answer ready - it's pretty easy to show that no one gets their morals from the Bible. The Bible is full of obviously immoral behavior, which God approves of. There's the Jephthah story in Judges 11, where a warrior strikes a deal with God that if he wins a battle, he'll offer to God as a burned sacrifice, the first thing that comes out of his house when he returns home. This turns out to be his only daughter. The good and honorable Jephthah follows through on his commitment and sacrifices her.

The Bible also tells you just how hard God wants you to beat your slaves: anything up to the point of causing actual injury is OK with him.

Now if you find either of these acts to be immoral, then you must be getting that sense of morality from somewhere other than your religion.

The fact that other higher species also exhibit social morality (as in behavior codes and punishment for breaking them) tells us that our sense of morality is hard-wired into our brains. This gets screwed up in some people, but the vast majority of people are decent folks who would rather help their fellow citizens, not because of religion, but simply because they want to.
 
"I find it easy, natural, and emotionally satisfying to love my fellow human beings without believing that there are prizes in the afterlife for doing so."
Yes!!! There you have it! And shouldnt god - if he existed - be even more pleased with a person that lives his life according to that principle, rather than the sheep that trembles from fear of him?
 
"I find it easy, natural, and emotionally satisfying to love my fellow human beings without believing that there are prizes in the afterlife for doing so."

You mean that, or you just made it up for Ceritus?

"I find it possible to tolerate humans , because I know they're all going to die ." How's that sound?
 
*puts on religiwoo hat*

He's in court RIGHT NOW. everyone, pray really hard for him!

Sorry. couldn't resist. Good luck, Ceritas.
 
Yes in Oklahoma. Also I understand they wouldn't understand natural science answers which is why I am looking for something short and sweet. I keep mulling over it, I am thinking something along the lines of "the same place we all do, our conscience". If asked to expound on that I think I could reply something along the lines of instead of doing the right thing in fear of retribution I do it out of the simple sincerity of just wanting to.

We have a proverb here in german: "Was Du nicht willst das man Dir tu, das füg auch keinem Anderen zu" (what you don't want to suffer do not do to somebody else).

A very honorable behavior, and IMHO morally superior to many religious rules.
 
I'm too late to the thread to help, but I just want to say that I am really moved by how quickly so many people stepped up to the plate and came through with links, ideas, and even ready made phrases for Ceritus to use in court today -- just in case.

Good luck Ceritus, and let us know how it went.
 
When I saw the title, my initial response was "Bill and Ted." But I'm not sure that will necessarily work in a courtroom.
 
We have a proverb here in german: "Was Du nicht willst das man Dir tu, das füg auch keinem Anderen zu" (what you don't want to suffer do not do to somebody else).

A very honorable behavior, and IMHO morally superior to many religious rules.

Just let me add:
I wish you good luck with all my heart - not mainly for you, but for the child. I wish you sincerelly that there might be a way of agreement between you and your ex which puts the smallest possible load on the child.
(Having gone through such a situation and luckily settled it in friendship).

You and your ex were in love. It died. But why that hate? Why not, as friends, take the responsibility?

I am pretty old, but my feelings may apply to younger peolpe as well: As soon as we have children it is not our world anymore, it is the world of our children. We have done what we could, and they will do what they can do, and we will have difficulties to understand what they will do. Such is life. Let us do our best not to spoil them. With quarreling about them we will spoil them for sure.

Good luck once more, and good inspiration.
 
I am an eagle scout and I have been in the military as a meteorologist for 6 years 3 months and have done numerous things to help the community to include volunteering for habitat for humanity through first baptist church over here.

Your scouting experience is significant, because that organization drills into boys at a young age the idea that "good deeds" should be done without expectation of reward, but for the satisfaction of having done the right thing.

At least, that was my experience.
 
I know I'm too late to contribute to your original question, but I hope things turned out well, and I sure hope our legal system is mature enough that demonstrating that you're a good person renders any discussion of why you're a good person irrelevant.
 
Hey, Ceritus, I don't know you, of course, but it seems to me your daughter is very lucky to have two parents who love her so much.

I wish you all the best.
 
You mean that, or you just made it up for Ceritus?
Both.

I'd normally give that answer but in a sort of sarcastic way that implies that anyone who disagrees with me is an idiot. I'm not sure that that would go down very well in Ceritus' position, so I took a deep breath and tried being sincere instead.
 
Ceritus, please let us know how it goes!

Well, I will find out the judgment today sometime the judge said he would have the action written out tommorrow (which is today).

The fact that I am atheist did come up as I suspected and it went something like this. I was on the stand and her lawyer was berating me with tons of questions each of which I had an honest answer for then he said from what I understand you are a humanist and would deny Elizabeth (my daughter) from going to church. I replied I would never deny my daughter from going to church, if she wanted to go to church. I would be happy to support her in that decision, my main goal is to show her all the possible options so she can make a sound decision that she is happy with. That I wanted her to critically think about all decisions she makes so one day she can become a well-rounded adult. Then he replied you have already made that decision for yourself? Then I replied and said that is correct, I do not go to church nor do I follow any sort of religion.

I even was asked why I did not marry her and do the "right thing" after I found out she was pregnant. I replied that it may have seemed like a good option from your point of view but I find it far more devastating for a child to be raised in a household where there would be constant fighting that would eventually end up in a divorce a few years later. Then he even asked me why I would have sex with a person I did not intend to marry and I replied, "Because I wanted to and it was enjoyable". Then he asked why then did I not step up and marry her for the best interest of Elizabeth so I could be in her life. Where I replied "I already answered that question and I am stepping up right now so I can be in her life"

By the end of the hearing I actually felt bad for her lawyer because he didn't have a leg to stand on and I know he is just trying to earn a paycheck but in my honest opinion he did absolutely horrible. My lawyer on the other hand did a wonderful job and I am really feeling good about the decision the judge will make today.

The only thing that really does make me nervous though is that while my wife and I were sitting in the hall waiting for the previous hearing to be finished a young child in the judges office that was accompanied by 3 other adults and a secretary were singing happy birthday to Jesus because the young child felt like singing and they all joined in even though obviously it is not Christmas. Altus Oklahoma is a scary place to be an atheist.
 
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From what I understand you are a humanist and would deny Elizabeth (my daughter) from going to church.
"From what I understand you are a Protestant and want to burn Catholics at the stake."

Unforunately, being a sarcastic smartass doesn't win you any points, which I think is most unfair.
 
Ceritus, I sure hope justice is met in your case. I agree that the opposition's lawyer probably did harm to his side's case by bringing up religion. Even if staff were singing sons about jebus, a judge is charged with being fair to all, regardless of religion. I just hope you got a good judge.

If it comes up again, I always use the Golden Rule. That's not religious and everyone understands it as being the underlying principal of what is good.

Best of luck!
 
I just love how this lawyer attacked you for having sex out of wedlock, when I do believe that the *ahem*, "godly" mother must have consented to such a thing as well.

I can't believe such things are allowed in a court of law in this day and age. I guess I've been sheltered living on the West Coast my whole life. I couldn't even bring up an objection to my ex husband taking my (at the time) 7 year old to Burning Man in court, it wasn't considered a "moral concern".
 
Then he even asked me why I would have sex with a person I did not intend to marry
You're a better man than me. I would have stared and him and said, "I'm sorry, but we have to take away your man card now."
 

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