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Haikuing through the paranormal woods

Vikram

Muse
V
Joined
May 21, 2004
Messages
520
Here's a set of seven stylized ones:

#1
My Astrologer
told me I would soon be wed.
The Bloody Liar!

#2
Everytime I pray
to Ra, the God of the Sun,
my retina burns.

#3
She has quite a gift -
she often talks to the dead.
They never reply.

#4
After some Reiki
my soul feels light and buoyant.
As does my wallet.

#5
From distant planets
come those who desire to
probe orifices.

#6
The ghost of Elvis
visited an old crone.
Her hip is still healing.

#7
Toys like vibrators
are best when not in sizes
homeopathic.
 
Talking dogs and presumptious kings

"The Dog and The King"

The masses are here my master
They wield their hate with threat
We will cave in if you do not stop this disaster
They have come to claim our debt

Now now my easy servant, get a grip of your fears
Things are not as serious as you presumed
So let them cry and time will have their hate consumed

But master, they are coming through the door
I can not hold them off for long
They have gathered with the savages of the moor
And I am afraid we are singing on our last song

Easily startled are you my dog
Where ever did you learn to speak the tongue of men
No one is coming through the door you silly, silly hen

I hear your words but I do not understand
There is too much noise for my ears to handle
And your insults are no helping hand
As I try to uncover this loud darkness with my only candle

The thorough beating of the crowds
Is an illusion that you will never understand
It is a noise that will not be stopped by any paw or hand

Why are you not afraid, tell my what it is
For if it is not an angry mob
It must be something else of unholy bliss
And there is too much fear in my blood for my heart to throb

My dear servant, you lack the wit
To understand that it is thunder you seem to hear
It comes from the heavens and has the sky lit
So there is no angry crowd for you to fear

Thank you my master, you are my owl of wisdom
But must nature play such confusing tricks
Just to see us dogs get lost in our freedom
As it sticks to our fur like persistent ticks

My little hairy companion, how you must suffer
You seem to be lost more often than found
A homemade brew of courage is all that I can offer
To dog my dog, whose folly believes the world is round

The End
 
Vikram said:
Here's a set of seven stylized ones:

#1
My Astrologer
told me I would soon be wed.
The Bloody Liar!
.
.
.
Click to expand...

Please, go see jj
He knows how to do haikus
Without insulting...
 
Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

jzs said:
Please, go see jj
He knows how to do haikus
Without insulting...
Click to expand...

Claus Larsen was right
when he said you need to get
a sense of humor
 
Re: Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

Vikram said:
Claus Larsen was right
when he said you need to get
a sense of humor
Click to expand...

Oh, I got plenty
When I read the JREF posts
Claus's make me laugh aloud
 
Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

jzs said:
Vikram said:
Here's a set of seven stylized ones:

#1
My Astrologer
told me I would soon be wed.
The Bloody Liar!
.
.
.
Click to expand...

Please, go see jj
He knows how to do haikus
Without insulting...
Click to expand...


Were you two engaged?
Is that the part you find offensive?

Should we all leave you two alone, while you work this out?
 
Re: Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

Sloe_Bohemian said:
Should we all leave you two alone, while you work this out?
Click to expand...

Oh no! Not at all. Please join in. :p
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

jzs said:
Oh, I got plenty
When I read the JREF posts
Claus's make me laugh aloud
Click to expand...


That one's not haiku
Too many syllables there
Sorry but you lose
 
They don't need the cash
These psychics that we challenge
So why do they charge?
 
Re: Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

Were you two engaged?
Is that the part you find offensive?

Should we all leave you two alone, while you work this out?
Click to expand...

No, no...

It's 5,7,5...
 
Sylvia's reply:
Crickets chirp eternally.
News at eleven!

Uri G. explains:
"I don't grip the spoon, you see."
Gripped the spoon. We saw.

Psychic seeks an "e";
Only the most common vowel
in the alphabet.

Ideomotor
effect makes dowsers think their
sticks go up and down.

"Dirty cursed money"
is why they don't prove their claims;
not because they're fakes!
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Haikuing through the paranormal woods

Gr8wight said:
That one's not haiku
Too many syllables there
Sorry but you lose
Click to expand...

Nah, it was just a whole new haiku style. ;)
 
Childishness rampant!
Jason or Joshua, well?
Mask or statistics?
 
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