Druids hired to cut road accidents

[DaChew]

Apologies if this has already been posted. Austrian politicians putting tax money to work in secret:
http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies/Druids_hired_to_cut_road_accidents

Check the photo. I'd be smiling too if I was getting paid to stand by the side of a road holding a couple of sticks.

 

[Vortigern99]

Finally! That iron-clad evidence of the Druidic god I've been waiting for!

 

[Safe-Keeper]

The team is said to have reduced fatal accidents at one notorious crash site to zero after restoring its "terrestrial radiation".

How was this conclusion reached? Did they just record a given time period and go "ok, no fatalities from January to March, problem solved!".

 

[TheDaver]

It sounds as if they hired the druids a year or two ago and are attributing any improvements in accident statistics in that time to them.

 

[ksbluesfan]

I thought Druids disappeared about 1800 years ago.

 

[The Gonif]

Do you think those guys are standing around on the side of the road all day with their sticks? That would certainly slow traffic.

And can anyone explain what "negative radiation" is?

 

[leon_heller]

It's the opposite of "positive radiation". Unfortunately, I can't find what that is, either.

 

[DaChew]

You know, if they can convince the public that they've actually solved the problem, I bet this is far less work and less expensive than actually doing something in reality to make the roads more safe.

Probably the best thing they could do now is to win the Challenge - they'd of made the roads more safe, probably saving the lives of citizens AND they'd have an additional $ million to spend on Druids. Since a huge number of accidents occur in the home, maybe every Austrian citizen should have his own Druid stick waver draining the negative energy that causes them.

 

[Fnord]

Finally! That iron-clad evidence of the Druidic god I've been waiting for!

Naw ... that's just a shaved Sasquatch in a loose-fitting robe ... there's no such thing as a Druidic god.

 

[George 152]

What about the accidents where a motorist laughs so much he loses control of the car and runs over the 'druid'

 

[Vortigern99]

they'd have an additional $ million to spend on Druids.

The first and only time this sentence has ever been uttered, or written, in any language on earth.

 

[DaChew]

The first and only time this sentence has ever been uttered, or written, in any language on earth.

Druids don't grow on trees you know (that's cookie-making Elves)

 

[a3sigma]

What about the accidents where a motorist laughs so much he loses control of the car and runs over the 'druid'

None of my Austrian friends has that much of a sense of humor.

 

[Aoidoi]

That druid is doing it wrong, clearly should be in Tree Form. Noob.

 

[Dave Rogers]

And can anyone explain what "negative radiation" is?

It's the opposite of "positive radiation". Unfortunately, I can't find what that is, either.

As far as I can see, they think they're irradiating the site with alpha particles. That would cancel out the excess of beta particles they believe was present to start with, restoring the natural background radiation which I suspect is mostly gamma. All this presents an obvious radiation hazard, so anyone who gets cancer after using that stretch of motorway, however long afterwards, has grounds for a lawsuit against the Austrian government. Wouldn't it be interesting to see how that played out?

Dave

 

[jakesteele]

You gotta admit, though, that would be a great job if you could get it.

 

[SpuriusMaximus]

Bah, what's a Druid got to do with something as human-made and modern-day as a highway? Not much nature there.

What they really want there is a Cleric of Akadi, the goddess of Movement and Speed. (And Air Elementals, but that is only relevant if you're blessing an airport)

 

[Dave Rogers]

I think a Techmarine dispensing the Blessing of the Omnissiah would do better. They can fix a vehicle damage result on a D6 roll of (6 minus the number of servo-arms available) or better, so preventing accidents should be child's play.

Dave

 

[Safe-Keeper]

http://nngllc.com/newsletter/images/Sandtroopers.jpg
"Look sir! Druids!"

 

[sadhatter]

Why are druids crapping all over my parade lately?

Playing d and d, and the druid is useless and causes us to waste resources, living real life, and druids are useless and causing us to waste resources.

**** druids, seriously.