I just think it's a weak argument to say that because "like" can be used figuratively, it can't possibly be descriptive of real events and refutes the precision of some of these observations.
Just out of curiosity, Red, let's suppose that you witnessed the following events, and then someone asked you about them later:
1. A rambunctious kid running thru a museum catches your attention, & you watch him as he collides with a stand, and see an expensive vase topple over & hit the floor.
2. You see a car, swerving down a road, finally lose control & smash into a parked car.
Would you say about those events:
"I saw the kid knock the stand, the vase fell and then it sounded like a vase breaking."
"I watched the car swerving down the street & then it sounded like one car hitting another one."
Or would you say, using factual statement:
"I saw the kid it the stand, the vase fell & I heard it break."
"I watched the car swerve down the street, lose control & heard it crash into the other car."
Or, using similes:
"I saw the kid it the stand, the vase fell & it sounded like someone threw a stone thru a window."
"I watched the car swerve down the street, lose control & hit the other car. It sounded like an explosion."
"... it sounded like ..."
"... it looked like ..."
"... it felt like ..."
Similes have a very specific usage & semantic context.
They describe events that we are describing, using descriptors that use comparisons to events that specifically did not happen. (No stone thru window. No explosion.)
You do not use "like" when describing events factually, i.e., related what did happen.
The use of the word "like" strongly implies that the users know that the event (i.e., explosions) did not really happen.
Tom