Church Signs get more aggressive

[slingblade]

Oh, okay, I can just ignore your failed argument, then. Works for me.

 

[Fnord]

Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.

If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.

If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.

Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.

 

[Soapy Sam]

It would be a very dull heaven that had no dogs or rocks.

 

[Sledge]

In reply to that, Sledge said "take more water with it." No clue what that means, either.

It is a humourous implication that epix is posting whilst under the influence of alcohol, and should in future dilute his drink of choice with more water to mitigate its effects.

Interestingly, this thread is now the fourth result on Google for "take more water with it."

 

[Beerina]

There're some huge billboards along a highway near here, "Only liars go to <some local megachurch>!" and "Only hypocrites go to <it>!"

These include a URL that points out something to the effect of "Yes, we accept liars and hypocrites and sinners of all kinds!" Clever, if it weren't doing evil.

 

[Buckaroo]

My favorite sign has sat beside the road on I-65 North between Montgomery and Birmingham since I was kid:

"Go to church or the devil will get you!" (complete with a red horned Lucifer straight off the Underwood Deviled Ham package)

It doesn't get more direct than that...

 

[Manopolus]

There's a sign near where I used to live on I-35 in Kansas that says "Accept Jesus Christ -- or regret it later."

Seriously, a threat? I'd actually like to know who put it up so I could knock them upside the head for misrepresenting our fair, meth infested city in such a way.

I don't know whether it was a church or an individual responsible.

 

[Sledge]

One of my favorite letters to the Viz letters page was "Why is it that it's ok for the vicar to threaten me with eternal damnation every Sunday, but when I threaten him with a Stanley knife, the police are called?"

 

[Zanders]

"There's no stop, drop and roll in Hell"

 

[Cactus Wren]

One near my old house read:

FOR ALL YOU DO
HIS BLOOD'S FOR YOU

 

[Accidental Martyr]

My favorite sign has sat beside the road on I-65 North between Montgomery and Birmingham since I was kid:

"Go to church or the devil will get you!" (complete with a red horned Lucifer straight off the Underwood Deviled Ham package)

It doesn't get more direct than that...

Yep, I've seen that one.

 

[Crossbow]

I saw a great one several years ago that was posted shortly before Mother's Day (and unfortunately I did not have a camera), it said:

EVE WAS A WOMAN

The fellow who wrote that sermon sure had some issues.

 

[Sonny2]

There's a great sign near Kalispell, Montana:

Is This The Sign You've Been Waiting For?
—God

It's really big, I thought it was hilarious, but I don't think the sign makers meant it like I took it, there's another down the road from the same people of the repent variety.

Flippin' hilarious.

 

[catsmate]

It would be a very dull heaven that had no dogs or rocks.

But what about cats? And Bearded Dragons?

 

[Scott Haley]

One time in church, a man said that he found a bible verse that mentioned a heavenly cavalry with vast numbers of horsemen. He said that if all of those horses can be in heaven, so could his dog.