• Due to ongoing issues caused by Search, it has been temporarily disabled
  • Please excuse the mess, we're moving the furniture and restructuring the forum categories
  • You may need to edit your signatures.

    When we moved to Xenfora some of the signature options didn't come over. In the old software signatures were limited by a character limit, on Xenfora there are more options and there is a character number and number of lines limit. I've set maximum number of lines to 4 and unlimited characters.

Parents encouraging underage drinking

My parents drove me to drink as well. I don't blame them cause they didn't know any better because I didn't speak up enough for myself, but really it was their nagging that did it.
 
SteveW said:
My wife and I both smoke so when our 16 year old son started there was not much we could say. We buy him a carton a week, the same as us.

As to drinking, absolutely not. Smoking a cig doesn't impair your judgement.
Sems to me your whole post contradicts the last sentence.
 
Originally posted by SteveW
As to drinking, absolutely not. Smoking a cig doesn't impair your judgement.


That is absolutely stupid. You can drink in moderation, and even occasional drunkeness isn't a huge threat to your health (not necessarily, anyway). You really can't play the same game with cigarettes. You're insane.
 
Umm, has anyone ever noticed that smokers are a little more 'on edge' than those who don't smoke? I've also noticed that older people who smoke and drink a lot are more prone to take things the wrong way and either get mad or fly off the handle.

This by no means that everyone who smokes is like that, I just noticed this in a large amount of smokers. I know a couple who are quite jovial, but then those ones seem more scatterbrained.

So I think the nicotine and host of other ingredients really can mess with your brain and judgement since it does change your brain.

I could be making a scatterbrained correllation myself here, but I was wondering if anyone thought the same sometimes. I can be very on edge too, and I don't smoke, but even more on edge around a thick smog of cigarette smoke.
 
The Fool said:


Bob.
Tony is a troll. He uses statements like "I see nothing wrong with parents allowing their kids to do alcohol or drugs." Because it is an inflamitory statement that he can then backslide on. If he meant "I see no great harm in allowing a child to have some wine with a meal" he would have said that. If challenged he will normally backslide on his statements saying that word X does not mean what people commonly believe word X to mean.... ie "kid" does not mean child..."doing alcohol and drugs" does not mean becoming intoxicated it means a sip of wine...


I belive you summed up your own dripple with this:

what bullsh*t.


I stand by my comment.
 
The Fool said:

I'm sure you do....can't justify, rationalise, explain or understand it, but stand by it anyway.....


There is really nothing to justify or rationalize. I simply see nothing wrong with allowing a kid to drink or do drugs.
 
Tony said:



There is really nothing to justify or rationalize. I simply see nothing wrong with allowing a kid to drink or do drugs.
And should you ever have the oportunity to put your policy into practice, you will be a child abuser....congratulations.
 
The Fool said:

And should you ever have the oportunity to put your policy into practice, you will be a child abuser....congratulations.


:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

A child abuser? Says who?

Care to explain how giving a kid the freedom to make his/her own decisions constitutes child abuse?
 
Um, you're supposed to parent kids, not grant them freedoms that are harmful. Will you grant kids the freedom to stay out all night too? Will you grant them the freedom to have orgies in your home and raise the number of teen pregnancies as a result?

It is the parent's job to teach children, not just let them do what they want to. Being a parent is just that, you are supposed to parent the kids until they have the judgement and self control to make better decisions. This judgement and self control is learned from the parent.

Kids have bad judgement because they aren't aware of consequences. They can't understand them until a certain age. A hormone raged teen is not the best at making judgements and recognizing consequences. That is why they have parents to watch out for them. Kids also have less self control because they aren't aware or have the insight to recognize when an action is dangerous.

Noone grants a toddler the freedom to play on a road. It's dangerous.
 
Wile E. Coyote said:
<snip>

There are two things amiss about this:
1. She plays drinking games with him. This does not teach responsible drinking.
2. Why does she think he will not go out drinking with his friends anyway? Is it more cool to drink with your Mom than with your friends? I don't think so.

What are your views on this?

I think you Aunt is trying to hard to be your cousin's pal rather than his parent, and that is a problem. Your cousin, like all children, needs limits and your Aunt is not impossing any which in my opinion leads to more and more dangerous behaviors in children because children often push as far as they can to see where their limits are set.

I have never understood the whole, "Better in front of me than behind my back" attitude because it really doesn't work. Encouraging your child to partake in destructive behaviors as long as they are in front of you, is sending the wrong message, and it, IMO, destructive to the child. One would encourage one's child to commit murder at home to keep him from going out and doing it. It is absurd reasoning. One must set down rules and expect them to be followed, and set up reasonable consequences if the rules are broken.

Now that said, I allow my 16 year old son an occasional glass of wine. Not because I am afraid that he will go out and drink behind my back, but because he likes it and the occasional glass will not bring him harm, and I am hoping that he learns to be a responsible drinker.
 
Tony said:
Care to explain how giving a kid the freedom to make his/her own decisions constitutes child abuse?

Perhaps when you have a child of your own and then lose him/her to an unwise decision made due to immaturity/alcohol/drugs you will change your point of view. Maybe you think children and adolescents are capable of reliably making good decisions that benefit their long-term goals as opposed to instant gratification, but most intelligent adults would disagree.

Like I said earlier, it is not the parent's responsibility to be friends with their child. You do not have to be liked, but you have a duty as a parent to give your child the best opportunity you can manage. Drugs and alcohol do not fit into this model.
 
Eos of the Eons said:
Um, you're supposed to parent kids, not grant them freedoms that are harmful. Will you grant kids the freedom to stay out all night too? Will you grant them the freedom to have orgies in your home and raise the number of teen pregnancies as a result?

It is the parent's job to teach children, not just let them do what they want to. Being a parent is just that, you are supposed to parent the kids until they have the judgement and self control to make better decisions. This judgement and self control is learned from the parent.

Kids have bad judgement because they aren't aware of consequences. They can't understand them until a certain age. A hormone raged teen is not the best at making judgements and recognizing consequences. That is why they have parents to watch out for them. Kids also have less self control because they aren't aware or have the insight to recognize when an action is dangerous.

Noone grants a toddler the freedom to play on a road. It's dangerous.



That's all so wrong, I don't know where to begin.....

What kind of mother are you?! God. I'd kill myself so fast if I were your son.
 
American said:




That's all so wrong, I don't know where to begin.....

What kind of mother are you?! God. I'd kill myself so fast if I were your son.

ha ha ha. At least my kid will live past the age of 3, and even to adulthood.
 
Back
Top Bottom