Mary, I've been reading your posts for years and have great respect for your clarity of thought. I do, however, think you have a blind spot when it comes to the fact that it's in Amanda's best interest to put her best foot forward.
I claim no "moral authority." Nothing I wrote has anything to do with morality. I wasn't "offended" by her comment. I was concerned, the same way I’d be concerned if my daughter said something that could be used against her -- though more so because my daughter isn’t facing a prison sentence and isn’t a target of hate web sites.
There is no monolithic "pulse of opinion." A great many people aren't interested enough in the case to care. There is, however, such a thing as common sense and "a take" that registers with people, even if they don't mention it. Why did Bill Maher joke about the Sawyer interview? Did he poll public perception first? No, he just knew a couple comments struck a peculiar note. Same way I knew, the LAST thing the Kerchers want right now is to visit Meredith's grave with her -- and that suggesting it comes off as insensitive. And guarantees reaction.
The Kerchers have Amanda all wrong. They were brainwashed at their most vulnerable. With proper feedback, Amanda could have used moments of, say, the Diane Sawyer interview to soften haters view of her. Instead, she said something that wigged out the Kerchers. Headlines could have read “Knox speaks fondly of her friend.” Instead, they say "Kerchers beg Knox to stay away from the grave."
It hurts her, Mary.
But let me be clear: I don't blame Amanda for ill-advised comments. She's a traumatized kid, with wa-a-ay too much to worry about. I blame her inner circle for not giving her constructive feedback. For not PROTECTING her from the howling wolves. You may think it's kindness to send a traumatized kid to interviews without critical attention to what she says and how she says it. I don't. I think it causes the poor kid unnecessary pain.
Regarding your third point: I favor truth to biting my keyboard. My analysis of the situation leads me to conclude Amanda and Raff are innocent. I'm sticking to it. My analysis of Amanda Knox -- and myself and the rest of humanity -- leads me to conclude no one's perfect. I'm sticking to that as well. Preservation of a united front in Perugia is what caused this mess in the first place -- and what perpetuates it.
Moreover, there’s a HUGE difference between critiquing Amanda’s interviews and claiming she caused the mess. I see Grinder said he’s been helping people present information for years. I have experience in that realm as well, which may be why our views are so different from yours. I see no shame, blame, or accusation of murder in wanting Knox to improve her spokesperson skills. Very few people are naturals. Very few spokespeople don’t get coached on how to present themselves – and on what NOT to say.