What? Not announcing to the students that she was in porn is poor judgment? Really?
Yes. If you are dealing with people who are fairly likely to discover your "secret" then you are only creating problems. If it's likely to impact order and discipline amongst a population of minors when this is discovered - then yes - she DID cause problems. That's poor judgment.
There are no good analogies for this case., but here is one weak attempt. Around fifth grade I had a math teacher with a glass eye. I'd seen him in school before and maybe his eyes looked a little odd, but it never occurred to be that was the problem. So the first day he explained to the class he had a glass eye. He took it out. Told how he lost his eye in a sledding accident as a kid. That was the last time it came up. No secrecy - issue handled.
If instead he pretended nothing was wrong then kids would obviously notice his eye in time, would certainly gossip, make up stories, ridicule the teacher, maybe use his partial lack of vision against him. The secrecy causes these problems.
Also note the secretary might have been blackmailed by an adult as well. That bad judgment too.
The secrecy created conditions for blackmail by her secrecy, when they are fairly likely to be discovered, Very poor judgement.
....? How did you jump from "it was because she was keeping what she did off work hours a secret that caused the problems" (which is a leap in itself) to "it's bigotry on the school's part"?
There is no "leap" to get from secret to problem. If she was open about her past, then there would have been no problem. No secret, so everyone would know. She would not be subject to blackmail if everyone knew.
I never said it was bigotry on the school's part I argue that there was no evidence of bigotry by the school.
Back in the day I held security clearances. You have to fill out lots of forms and submit to interviews. They DO NOT care if you are gay, or a porn actor, or go to cock fights, or cheat on your wife. What they care about is - are you lying about it. If you are keeping secrets then you are subject to blackmail and an unacceptable security risk. This situation is similar tho' the issue is school order, not national security.
Simply because one works for a company one HAS to tell every thing that one does off work hours? Really? An employer is just that: an employer. Not a babysitter, not a judge, but simply the person who pays you in exchange for your time, talents and effort. Period.
NO ! I never said anything like that. That's a silly extrapolation on your part.
If you have personal issues that impact your job performance or create liabilities - then you DO have an obligation to inform your employer. If your surgeon drinks enough to have tremors, or if your pilot wants to pull an all-niter before a trans-pacific flight - they OWE their employers a disclosure. If you have an actively infectious disease - then you owe your employer disclosure (if it potentially impacts others). If you have some personal hobby that will cause a discipline/order problems among minors at school and make you subject to blackmail - that requires disclosure. These situations impact the conditions of employment.
Now I would agree with the whole bigotry thing, I think that is what's going on, but how does her being upfront about being in a porno make the bigotry less?
I don't see any evidence of bigotry here, but I *suspect* it would likely appear. if, for example, you show up for an interview as school-secretary and your resume includes porn movies. *IF* bigotry exists at that point there are legal remedies, but that's hard and expensive to pursue.
So her situation is this; A/ tell the truth and
potentially be discriminated against for employment due to perfectly legal activities, or B/ lie (fail to disclose) and subject the school and students to problems in the future. I'd contact a lawyer familiar with the laws myself. If the secretary actually lied to gain employment, then she might be held legally responsible - and perhaps the 14yo blackmailers parent would sue anyway.
Also consider that 14yo snot who tried to blackmail her into a BJ. That's pretty bad, but to be fair, after the kid watches her porn performances, and given that the kid is a minor and not entirely responsible for his actions ... how much blame is his vs hers ? That secretary put a 14yo in a bad position by creating an
attractive nuisance (OK - she's not that attractive). She created a situation where a daft horny 14yo might be induced into making some terrible choices including blackmail. All due to her secrecy about her past. Terrible judgment.
To re-iterate the obvious. That same student has probably seen vids of Paris Hilton giving BJs - but since she's not trying to maintain a secret - there is no opportunity for blackmail.
Do you honestly believe that people (especially parents - the ones who were originally "outraged"
(I love it when parents are "outraged"
)) would be less bigoted if she told everyone from the get-go?
I seriously doubt it.
Perhaps - but you are making assumptions. For example in the US we are so litigious that if you kick a candidate for past porn the school might have legal problems. You can't justify putting the school in a bad position be claiming they 'would have' discriminated, even it is seems fairly likely.
She was right to keep it a secret. She didn't want anyone to know because of the backlash. Her telling everyone first wouldn't have made a difference.
It would have made a HUGE difference - no potential for blackmail. No attractive nuisance created to snare minors. No school discipline problems. Secrecy is a bad choice here.
But I agree with you about the bigotry to a point: she is not hiding it from her children because of bigotry. She is hiding it from her children because a) they don't need to know and b) they are too young to understand.
Really ? Do gay parent hide their homosexuality from their children and fear anyone telling the kids ? No - she want's to hide it from her children b/c the secretary is herself bigoted against porn acting. If she actually accepted her porn career she could just explain it to the kids in an age appropriate way.
.
A lot of people nowadays believe that keeping something secret = it's a bad thing.
I'd guess the opposite; few people believe in honesty.
.
That is not the case, especially in this situation. She kept it secret simply because she has a right to, because there are people who believe that being in a porno will "affect the children" and there are people who believe that keeping something secret = it's a bad thing.
No - Her lie created conditions for problems at school, and created the (realized) potential for blackmail.. She owed it to the school to disclose that her past career would likely create problems. Then it would be up to the school to manage the issue w/ students. She didn't disclose - so now it's all her fault. I appreciate that she has some difficult choices given the potential for discrimination, but the secret clearly created problems this time.
Just because he's a minor in the eyes of the law? 
A bit misleading, huh? 
