Myth 3. A woman who was truly being raped would offer utmost physical resistance.
Fact: Many rape victims offer no physical resistance whatsoever. Despite changes in rape law to eliminate the requirement for earnest resistance, the lingering demand for evidence of physical resistance on the part of some judges and jurors reflects a lack of awareness of how rape usually happens.
There are several reasons why many victims do not resist.
The first is women’s lifetime of socialization to be nice. Many victims do not resist at the start of an assault because they are afraid of embarrassing themselves or the assailant. Women and girls are socialized from birth to be polite, to smile, not to offend and not to say “no” because it may hurt someone’s feelings. By the time these women realize how much danger they are in, it is too late to resist.
Second is the fact that men's greater size and strength are in themselves threatening to women and are often enough either to intimidate the victim or to overcome her resistance.
Even when no force is used beyond the intimidation factor of the man's size and/or greater strength, women experience great fear and indeed often fear for their lives. "I thought he was going to kill me" is a common statement from rape victims. In the Rape in America study 49% of rape victims feared serious physical injury or death. This fear causes some women to make a strategic decision not to offer physical resistance. They believe with good reason that submission will increase their chances of surviving the rape, or surviving without major physical injury.
Other women experience one of two terror-induced altered states of consciousness called dissociation and frozen fright which render them totally passive. For some victims of both stranger and nonstranger rape the psychic stress is so extreme that they dissociate during the rape, saying later that they felt it was a terrible dream, or that it was as if the attack were happening to their body and they were watching it from the outside.