Agree.
However, it seems like lesbians who push back against statements that they should be willing to date women with penises are often (always?) labeled as TERFs.
Do you find this acceptable? Is it acceptable to label lesbians who push back against the idea that they should date people with penises as TERFs based solely on that issue?
No, I don't believe I have done so. If any of my statements read that way, it's by error on my part.
Some of the linked organizations I've been talking about are about as explicitly TERF as they get, places like LGB (no T, intentionally) alliance. They take an explicitly TERF viewpoint, in that they are feminist, pro-queer people that specifically exclude trans people in that ideology that is otherwise very accepting. I refer to them as TERFs. Again, TERFs are only a small subset of the larger anti-trans community, and a rather small subset at that. The largest group of anti trans people is probably your run of the mill reactionary conservative, the type of person who is also likely anti-gay and anti-abortion, etc.
Because it often seems that disagreement with any idea put forth by any trans voice is sufficient to get one labeled as trans-phobic/TERF/anti-trans. I find that to be problematic. (More on that below.)
Are there voices in the trans movement who call out the people who call lesbians vagina fetishists for their anti-lesbian bigotry?
Agreed. I'm pretty sure that the majority of trans-women get that most lesbians are not attracted to penises. And it is unfair to characterize the whole group by the fringe.
On the other hand, when the loudest voices of your movement...the ones who draw the most attention, admittedly because they have the wildest ideas...are the fringe groups, that's detrimental to your movement. If you don't somehow counter those voices, they become your movement.
It's similar to what happens with political parties. If the radical fringe becomes the loudest voice with little challenge, that voice becomes the definition of the party.
Evidence of this usually seems to boil down to screenshots of nobodies on Twitter. The "receipts" linked in this thread seems to be just a bunch of Twitter cranks. Social media is chock full of extremely noisy fringe groups, including TERFs and anti-lebsian trans people like you describe.
Generally I wouldn't consider many of them worth much consideration. Unless I overlooked something, these fringe trans activists don't seem to have anything near the organization or reach of the TERF extremists. In the case of the Canadian TERF-run women's shelter, the group controlled a charity and was leading a campaign to challenge the now-passed pro-trans addition to Canadian civil rights law. They allowed their shelter to shut down rather than comply with trans-inclusive law. Or the more recent case of the UK TERFs advocating, successfully, for the state to prohibit trans-affirming medical care for consenting, under 16 year old patients. I'm not really seeing anything close to that level of power being wielded by the anti-lesbian trans extremists.
Is there anything equivalent from the anti-lebsian trans extremists you describe, or do they have little reach beyond their twitter screeds? You can see why I don't treat them as equally alarming, even if both are quite clearly bigoted in their ideology.
That's why I push back at the attempts for others on this thread to nutpick and try to smear all trans people by this fringe which, to my estimation, doesn't seem to amount to much more than twitter cranks harassing people on the web. That's repugnant, but doesn't really rise much above the general background level of bigotry that exists on social media and the wider web.
I wouldn't be surprised if many of the screenshotted examples are from accounts that are now banned from social media for violating anti-harassment policies. You won't see me bemoaning their absence, but there's no shortage of TERF defenders crying when bigoted trolls like Graham Linehan get the boot.
I'll also point out that holding some what I believe you call "TERF ideas" does not make one a TERF. For example, if one believes that sports are segregated for reasons of biological differences rather than social/gender reasons, that does not make one anti-trans, transphobic or a TERF. It means that you disagree on an issue. Similarly, believing the term "woman" refers enough to biology that it is unnecessary to alter language referring to female health does not make one a TERF/bigot/etc. It means that you disagree on terminology.
Is it really?
If you hold the view you just outlined, you should be pretty selective about who you apply it to.
But the usage of the term has grown to be applied to people (particularly women) who disagree (or do not fully agree) with any idea put forth by the trans-rights movement. It's no longer used as a description of position but as a derogatory slur to shut down debate:
P1: Trans people should have the right to....
P2: I disagree. I think that circumstance X means that there have to be limits on ....
P1: Well, you're just a TERF.
P2: No I'm not!
P1: You hold TERF ideas, therefore you are a TERF.
P2: Wait, I support trans rights. I just think that in this one area...
P1: Yeah, that makes you a TERF.
See, it shuts down discussion about the particular positions of P1 and P2 and shifts the conversation to P2 defending their character instead. It's a great debate tactic, but a poor discussion tactic.
For that reason, I dislike it when the term is thrown around. It's also counterproductive. It doesn't shame someone to your side. It alienates them and pushes them to identify more with the radical TERFs you are opposed to.
I don't think I've ever stated that anyone weighing in on the sex-segregated sports issue is a TERF. In fact, it's an issue that I'm still quite undecided myself and one that is quite tricky.
It is an issue in which the TERFs are very animated, as one small subset of those weighing in. I suspect they intend to use it as a wedge issue for the larger anti-trans agenda. Not all people opposing trans inclusion in sports are TERFs, but the TERFs are definitely very vocal on the issue.
People who want to engage on that issue is good faith should probably make it clear that bigots on their side are not welcome as allies. I would no sooner ally with a TERF on an issue than I would some fascist who happens to overlap in ideology about the evils of corporate power or whatever. Common cause with bigots always backfires.
Even if you think the TERFs hold the correct view on a certain issue, their broader, unwarranted animus towards trans people should be a dealbreaker.
With all that said, notice that none of this position will be received and interpreted in good faith by some here, specifically Emily Cat, who will insist with this blatantly bad faith claims of "men trying to silence women". I have yet to receive a meaningful response to my point that queer people, including lesbian women, are supportive of trans rights. EC will try to claim trans women are just men trying to silence "real" women, meanwhile lesbian women vehemently disagree with these TERFs extremists trying to advocate bigotry in their name.