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Rapture - 23rd September 2015

dlorde said:
Dang, I'm doing something else on the 23rd - and I can't cancel, I already paid for the tickets...

You lot will have to go ahead and get rapt without me, I'll be thinking of you; oh, and tell the big guy I'll catch up with him later.
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Oh ****, I've just looked at the vacation schedule and a couple of my German clients are on holiday then so I simply won't have time for the rapture, sorry :o
 
What if they gave a rapture, but nobody was found to be worthy? Would we even notice?
 
tsig said:
Judging from all the previous Raptures, World Endings, Apocalypses, god removing his hand of protection, et. al. I don' think you will notice.
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I put some serious consideration into opening up an educational/parody website touching on this. I even registered a clever domain name (still have it). Sadly I'm no good at web design and couldn't find someone to do the design part (admittedly I put little effort into this part). Baby girl is taking up all my free time.

I thought it would be funny to have a huge clock on the main page counting down to the next rapture event, and a calendar so you can view all the other upcoming rapture events. It would even have a 'this day in history - the world ended X times' with links to the relevant Wiki pages or whatever could be scrounged up.

I thought it would be a nice answer to future claims of the end of the world. Just a link to the page.
 
The Greater Fool said:
You would think that Christians might have run across this since, well, it's a key scripture used to support the Rapture:

“But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father..." (Matthew 24:36 NIV)
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No, no! Matthew is talking about the day Jesus comes to claim his kingdom. No one knows when that is.


The Rapture is supposed to happen approximately one thousand years before the Kingdom of God. When it happens, it will happen in an instant. TheAantiChrist has to rule for about one thousand years after the Rapture occurs. He has to give almost everybody a number. This period is referred to as the Millennium.

The Millennium is mentioned somewhere in the New Testament. However, it is not very clear to all what the Millennium really means. There are some Christian sects that think it refers to the rule of the Antichrist.

JC comes to kick AC out approximately 1000 years after the Rapture. However, the process that brings the Messiah is extended. War, pestilence and famine can't be instantaneous events. So one doesn't have a precise time for that.

There is only one significant figure in '1000'. So the window for JC to appear is around 100 years long. JC can come between 950 and 1050 years after 23 September 2015. One can't know the exact date because Matthew rounded off his vision.

That would be a good day to begin the Antichrist film festival. There will be a lot of them. There is that miniseries, 'The Stand'. There is 'Rosemary's Baby' and 'The Omen' (I, II, III and remakes), 'Hellboy' (sequels, too), 'Sleepy Hollow (the series), etc.
 
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The concept of a Rapture didn't exist until the 1800s. As far as I can tell, the Rapture doctrine was stitched together using a number of unrelated and contradictory passages and then grafted onto an interpretation of the book of Revelations.

The unrelated passages include:
Matthew
I Thessalonians
2 Peter
1 Corinthians
Phillipians

The passage in Matthew is highly reminiscent of Passover in the book of Exodus. We have the same idea of readiness and the same idea of selection. Readiness is repeated in the parable of the brides.

Thessalonians, Matthew, and Peter describe a thief in the night. Yet, we also have descriptions of roars, trumpets, and everyone seeing the "Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory." Also, "That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat."

So, it is simultaneously stealthy and overwhelming. There is also mention of the dead rising, "the dead in Christ will rise first," and "the dead shall be raised incorruptible."

Now where have we seen that before? Ezekiel 37 where the dry bones come back to life "and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army."

But this passage isn't mentioned because it only references Jews:

"My people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. 13 Then you, my people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. 14 I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land."
 
barehl said:
The concept of a Rapture didn't exist until the 1800s. As far as I can tell, the Rapture doctrine was stitched together using a number of unrelated and contradictory passages and then grafted onto an interpretation of the book of Revelations.

The unrelated passages include:
Matthew
I Thessalonians
2 Peter
1 Corinthians
Phillipians

The passage in Matthew is highly reminiscent of Passover in the book of Exodus. We have the same idea of readiness and the same idea of selection. Readiness is repeated in the parable of the brides.

Thessalonians, Matthew, and Peter describe a thief in the night. Yet, we also have descriptions of roars, trumpets, and everyone seeing the "Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory." Also, "That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat."

So, it is simultaneously stealthy and overwhelming. There is also mention of the dead rising, "the dead in Christ will rise first," and "the dead shall be raised incorruptible."

Now where have we seen that before? Ezekiel 37 where the dry bones come back to life "and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army."

But this passage isn't mentioned because it only references Jews:

"My people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. 13 Then you, my people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. 14 I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land."
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The Rapture. For those who think the **** that's actually in the bible isn't crazy enough.
 
Agatha said:
What if they gave a rapture, but nobody was found to be worthy? Would we even notice?
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An ongoing rapture could be happening. Every moment of every day there's a breaming-up of ... no one. The celestial agents peer hopefully at their transporters and sigh upon the empty pads.
 
dc30hi.png
 
CORed said:
Book of Revelations is plenty crazy enough for me. It reads like it was written by somebody on a bad mushroom trip.
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The scholars appointed to produce the Authorized Version of 1611 - KJV to Earthlings - nearly omitted Revelation. Note no "s" for John 'The Divine's' Apocalyptic babbling.
 
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Matthew 24:36

“But concerning that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only."

The book says nobody can know the date. So any date prediction fails, end of story.
Chris B.
 
ChrisBFRPKY said:
Matthew 24:36

“But concerning that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only."

The book says nobody can know the date. So any date prediction fails, end of story.
Chris B.
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I know of the passage but never paid attention to the exact words. So the text says that not even Jesus knows the day, but these chuckleheads think they know the day. WTF?
 
Ladewig said:
I know of the passage but never paid attention to the exact words. So the text says that not even Jesus knows the day, but these chuckleheads think they know the day. WTF?
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As explained by Darwin123 in post #45 above, the date of the rapture is not the date to which Jesus was referring. I'm not saying any of it makes much sense, but this particular criticism is unwarranted.
 
Pixel42 said:
As explained by Darwin123 in post #45 above, the date of the rapture is not the date to which Jesus was referring. I'm not saying any of it makes much sense, but this particular criticism is unwarranted.
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I thought there is vigorous debate about that stuff. Premillennialism, Amillennialialism, Postmillenialism.
.
 
Pixel42 said:
As explained by Darwin123 in post #45 above, the date of the rapture is not the date to which Jesus was referring. I'm not saying any of it makes much sense, but this particular criticism is unwarranted.
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I think that's because Jesus never referred to a "rapture" in any way at all. It's the invention of modern minds.
 
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