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Why do lesbians look like men?

Polaris

Penultimate Amazing
Polaris
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
11,396
I'm not being cute here.

I work at a building as security, and each day a pair of girls come in together who both look like adolescent boys. I've seen them hold hands, etc - they're obviously lesbians.

When I was in college, I dated a girl whose roommate was bisexual, so I had occasion to hang out with lesbians occasionally. Sometimes I'd see some of them walking down the sidewalk, again holding hands, and I'd think they were a pair of gay men until I got close enough to realize they were women.

So I have to ask, why do lesbians seem to go out of their way to look as little like women as possible, if women are what they're attracted to?
 
Clearly the lesbians I have know were defective.
 
Polaris said:
I'm not being cute here.

I work at a building as security, and each day a pair of girls come in together who both look like adolescent boys. I've seen them hold hands, etc - they're obviously lesbians.

When I was in college, I dated a girl whose roommate was bisexual, so I had occasion to hang out with lesbians occasionally. Sometimes I'd see some of them walking down the sidewalk, again holding hands, and I'd think they were a pair of gay men until I got close enough to realize they were women.

So I have to ask, why do lesbians seem to go out of their way to look as little like women as possible, if women are what they're attracted to?
Click to expand...

Well, gee, I assume you're a guy and it is women you are attracted to. Would looking like a woman attract more women?

Other than that, I assume it is part of the gay psyche in some cases. While I know a few of the type to which you refer, I also know a few lesbians that act/look/talk/walk/dress like real babes.

I know they are lesbians because I hit on them and they reject me. :)
 
Many lesbians don't look like that, but of course you can't tell that they are lesbians simply from looking at them. I think you are overlooking the more feminine examples.
 
Seems to me there is a wide range of physical types in both male and female homosexuality. Amongst male gays, there are clearly very effeminate men who often manifest early in life. (so-called "sissy boys") These individuals often have a variety of manifestations including high voices, mannerisms, walks, and so forth.
On the other end, there is the so-called "bear", the very masculine homosexual.
Stereotypically interested in sports and other typically male stuff...

With females, the "bull dyke" type has a rather masculine appearance, from chunky bodies with ill-defined secondary sexual characteristics, deep voices, and so forth in contrast to lesbians of typically female appearance and behaviors.
It has always seemed to me that in addition to other factors that may influence sexual or gender identity, there must be part of the developmental process that allows for some percentage of people to be influenced "the wrong way" towards characteristics that are outside the normally-accepted gender characters.
 
Bikewer said:
Seems to me there is a wide range of physical types in both male and female homosexuality. Amongst male gays, there are clearly very effeminate men who often manifest early in life. (so-called "sissy boys") These individuals often have a variety of manifestations including high voices, mannerisms, walks, and so forth.
On the other end, there is the so-called "bear", the very masculine homosexual.
Stereotypically interested in sports and other typically male stuff...

With females, the "bull dyke" type has a rather masculine appearance, from chunky bodies with ill-defined secondary sexual characteristics, deep voices, and so forth in contrast to lesbians of typically female appearance and behaviors.
It has always seemed to me that in addition to other factors that may influence sexual or gender identity, there must be part of the developmental process that allows for some percentage of people to be influenced "the wrong way" towards characteristics that are outside the normally-accepted gender characters.
Click to expand...

Do you actually have any evidence for all of this, or is this all entirely in your own head?
 
well, I don't know that there is any "wrong" or "right" way to develop. I guess I worry more about what kind of a person someone is rather than what type of person someone is.

come to Vermont and play "pick the lesbians". You know what, it's harder than you know once you get past the media stereotypes. The more you see, the more you see the individuality of any "group".
 
Polaris said:
I'm not being cute here.

I work at a building as security, and each day a pair of girls come in together who both look like adolescent boys. I've seen them hold hands, etc - they're obviously lesbians.

When I was in college, I dated a girl whose roommate was bisexual, so I had occasion to hang out with lesbians occasionally. Sometimes I'd see some of them walking down the sidewalk, again holding hands, and I'd think they were a pair of gay men until I got close enough to realize they were women.

So I have to ask, why do lesbians seem to go out of their way to look as little like women as possible, if women are what they're attracted to?
Click to expand...

A- on the troll.

DR
 
Prenatal testosterone would probably be the dodgy science explanation. Though I very much doubt there is anywhere near a 1:1 correlation with sexuality. Most of the lesbians I have met have been very feminine. Having your hair cut in a male style really changes your appearance too. You may find they are rather less masculine than you thought at first glance, a similar effect can be achieved in men by wearing makeup and a dress..
 
Polaris said:
I'm not being cute here.

I work at a building as security, and each day a pair of girls come in together who both look like adolescent boys. I've seen them hold hands, etc - they're obviously lesbians.

When I was in college, I dated a girl whose roommate was bisexual, so I had occasion to hang out with lesbians occasionally. Sometimes I'd see some of them walking down the sidewalk, again holding hands, and I'd think they were a pair of gay men until I got close enough to realize they were women.

So I have to ask, why do lesbians seem to go out of their way to look as little like women as possible, if women are what they're attracted to?
Click to expand...

You haven't met the 'lipstick' lesbians.

So I would say it is a spmple size issue.
 
A friend of mine is gay. She likes/dates good looking women (by male standards).

I see your anecdote and raise you one.
 
Polaris said:
I'm not being cute here.

I work at a building as security, and each day a pair of girls come in together who both look like adolescent boys. I've seen them hold hands, etc - they're obviously lesbians.

When I was in college, I dated a girl whose roommate was bisexual, so I had occasion to hang out with lesbians occasionally. Sometimes I'd see some of them walking down the sidewalk, again holding hands, and I'd think they were a pair of gay men until I got close enough to realize they were women.

So I have to ask, why do lesbians seem to go out of their way to look as little like women as possible, if women are what they're attracted to?
Click to expand...

Actually, this is an interesting question about some lesbians. I don't see why lesbians attracted to butch women don't get attracted to men. Or why gay men who are attracted to femme men don't get attracted to women. But perhaps they do ...

This same criticism could apply to heteros though.
 
Rob Lister said:
Well, gee, I assume you're a guy and it is women you are attracted to. Would looking like a woman attract more women?
Click to expand...

Well yeah. that's kind of the reason I asked. I'm a man and attracted to women - who look like women. Lesbians are attracted to other women, so why do so many lesbian couples look like men?

I'm not asking this twice, I haven't read over the lengthier replies yet.
 
Dave1001 said:
Actually, this is an interesting question about some lesbians. I don't see why lesbians attracted to butch women don't get attracted to men. Or why gay men who are attracted to femme men don't get attracted to women. But perhaps they do ...

This same criticism could apply to heteros though.
Click to expand...

I'm not criticising anybody.
 
Concur on the sample size argument. Maybe you need to broaden your pool of lesbian acquaintances. I suggest shopping for power tools at Home Depot more often.

I have a diverse array of gay and lesbian friends - being a gay male myself, I tend to go to events that have lots of gay and lesbian people in attendance.

Sure - some lesbians have a mannish appearance, others look like typical women, some others are complete and utter babes. Just like some homosexual men have feminine features or go out of their way to appear feminine. And, there are other homosexual men who appear averagely masculine - all the way through the spectrum to those who put an over-emphasis on their masculinity so they are almost caricatures themselves.(Leather enthusiasts / Tom of Finland types)

And there are lots of lesbians who are foxy women. One of my friends is a lesbian 'Bud Girl' - nothing mannish about her at all.

Why do some heterosexual men insist on wearing socks with sandals, or growing a mullet? Why do some heterosexual women insist on wearing co-ordinated track suits?

Its diversity, baby.
 
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