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Totally Copys REO Speedwagon

Aw this is unfair. I'm going to complain if you guys don't leave me alone.


I frigging hate when people point out stuff I said in the past. It's in the PAST, so it shouldn't count against me. I'm talking about attacks made on girls who either ran away or were kidnapped, funny or un-funny jokes about rape (depending on your sense of humor- some you ain't got one), and things like this whole REO Speedwagon-stealing gay singer/songwriter Elton John thing.


You guys gotta LIGHTEN UP! I totally thought you used to be cool, but the more stuff you say I'm starting to think you're not that cool anymore. You can't take a joke, is what the problem is....
 
I don't enough about Elton John or REO Speedwagon to have an opinion.
 
Tony said:
I don't enough about Elton John or REO Speedwagon to have an opinion.
Click to expand...

You don't need to. The thread will educate you.

Give it a try it was funny (although I fear more of one of those "in-jokes" that never seem quite so funny to "outsiders" later on).
 
Hey American, can't you take a joke?

Why should I trust you if you can't take a joke?


Come to think of it, wasn't that the argument you made in my Non-drinkers thread you barged in on many moons ago?


Have you given your dad a hug yet? Doesn't a father deserve a hug from his own son?
 
Poll is designed to accelerate the death of this joke.

That's usually when a joke ends here, after the poll.*
































*Planet X joke excepted.
 
If you really don't care, I vote for the Swedish Chef, just 'cause I like him. But your own wishes should override anything anybody else wants.
 
Mere mortals can never understand the intricasies of the Phantom Poll.
 
The link doesn't work. Surely the thread hasn't been deleted? That would be a criminal waste of good comedy!
 
Silicon said:
Elton John totally copied REO Speedwagon
Click to expand...

It is an old joke, but still rather funny.

Anyway, it is too bad that there is not enough server space to save all of the threads (regardless of how silly they may be), however one can save these sorts of things to their own system.

My favorite is when the now banned poster "Jedi Knight" was posting all sorts of junk about gravity. Well, to be fair, just about all the stuff he posted was junk, but I think that this is best pig sty that he ever created, then proceed to live in feeling most pleased with his efforts.

Jedi Knight said:


If I rolled up all my threads into a ball it would be about the size of a walnut--3 times the size of your cranium lol.

JK
Click to expand...

To: Jedi Knight

OK you imbecile, let us all sample your neurons in action.

The below are some of the things JK had to say about gravity and cosmology in another thread (in bold).

http://host.randi.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?threadid=9858&pagenumber=2

Note: All of this just came from one page of an eight page thread. I do not know how, but he actually manages to make himself look even more stupid in the later pages, but it will serve the point just to show this one.

1) First item:

Bjorn, if you are floating in outer space, does your body weight matter? Does it? Does your body make gravity?

2) At this point, someone tried to tell JK to drop the topic since his rants were making him look silly. But of JK is just smart for that, so he responded thusly:

This is way too easy. Bjorn, if I roll a marble down a hill on one side of the road and roll another marble down the same hill at the same time on the other side of the road, do the marbles affect each other's mass?

Do the marbles emit "gravity" or does "gravity" rule the marbles?

If I take the same marbles and send them into space and they pass each other, with their courses be affected? Absolutely not.

If you took physics, I am laughing at you thinking you learned something.

Let me teach you some things about Physics, Bjorn. If you take your "body" and put it on Pluto, would it "weigh" the same?

Just have to love atheist "mysticism" lol. Your "body weight" comes from something Bjorn, and it is not your body. That is the whole point of what I am talking about.

I will say it again since everyone is ignoring it either because they don't understand it or fear trying to reply to it:

The Big Bang is so much pseudo-science that I can hammer the theory in one simple post.

Does "space" have mass? Does it? We know "gravity" is generated by stars--does "space" generate gravity?

If I have two particles (The Big Bang Theory) of opposites and they connect and create a "universe", what was the "gravity effect" that brought those particles together to start it all? Was there a sun? There couldn't be because that is "something from nothing" (spontaneous generation mystical science).

Take it a step further--let's say that the two particles did "mystically" start the big bang. Let's also say that those two particles inhabited 1 cubic meter of space. Where did that cubic meter come from? Since there was no gravity, how did the particles meet? Did the two particles float in the cubic meter of space and eventually wander into each other causing this massive release of energy that created the universe?

How much "space" existed to allow the two particles to "mystically exist"? Given the size of the universe, the two particles must have originated in the same area of space, a very limited area, potentially a microscopic area.

Now, if any of this is true, that means that the "explosion" that started the universe started from a centralized location--a focal point. Where is this focal point (starting point)?

The universe is trillions of years old. But I bet The Big Bang Theory makes it easier not to think about it lol. Kind of like psychic dowsing.

Simple question--where did the "space" come from that allowed the two "particles" to exist to "create" the universe?

JK

3) He was again warned of what he silly he was looking and that he should let the issue go. So what did JK do, he wrote this:

Let what go--the scientific mysticism I am reading from Bjorn?

Let me ask you a simple question, Fool. If you are sent into outer space without a space suit, does your body create "gravity" in zero gravity?

Or does it...come apart?

JK

and this:

Gosh, my body, according to Bjorn, creates "gravity". I guess I can fly to Mars and walk around the surface of the planet without a spacesuit!

JK

4) Someone tried to explain to him that gravity is always formed by any object with mass, and that if two bodies with mass are placed near one another, then they will be drawn together. Did he listen? Nope, he wrote:

Your body wouldn't be attracted to mine in zero gravity. What BS are you trying to throw around Fool! Our bodies may randomly run across each other if the body fluid eruptions propelled them on the same course after zero gravity death. But we would not create gravity to attract each other.

JK

5) Here is my favorite, it is where JK floats his idea that gravity is created by stars and the motions of planets.

The marbles didn't affect each other. I could roll one marble down one side of the road and it would behave the exact same way as if I rolled one down the other side of the road. The "marbles" obey the laws of physics. They do not create gravity. Gravity governs the marble. Anything with mass obeys gravity. Gravity is created in the universe by stars and the motion of the planets orbiting stars. That is where gravity comes from.

Now, explain to me how my body is going to create gravity so I can go to mars without a space suit and walk on the planet without one.

JK

6) Once again, people tried to explain to him how gravity is actually generated, and did he listen. Nope! He just wrote:

Sure Bjorn, and if I roll a marble down the highway in California in will affect the one I roll down the highway in Florida, won't it?

This is the best comedy I have read by Bjorn in a very long time.

JK

And he wrote this as well:

Gosh, so you are saying that if your body is floating near Saturn it will attract mine floating near Mars.

Jesus this is the most hilarious crap I have ever heard.

Gravity is "weight", right Fool? Your body "creates" weight in space (creates gravity)?

Better pass the pipe to Bjorn lol. This is hilarious!!!!!!!

JK

And this:

The marbles don't affect each other Bjorn. They obey, they do not order.

JK

And by this time, he started to think that people were telling him that humans are the source of gravity.

Oh I get it. The universe revolves around humans because of all the "gravity" we create LOL. How stupid of me.

JK

Once again, that thought that humans create all the gravity.

Yep, the universe revolves around humans lol. Why didn't I see it before.

Absolutely hilarious.

JK

Still hung up on that humans and gravity thing in spite of the numerous attempts to correct him.

OK Bjorn, humans create gravity and that holds the universe together--just like you said lol.

JK

As dense as ever.

No way am I going to let you get away with the nonsense you are spouting Bjorn. You said humans "create gravity". Humans have gravity because of our mass but we do not "create" gravity. We do not generate gravity.

But I like your theory about humans being the center of the universe--it fits with the atheist religion.

JK

Density still increasing.

Yep, that is what you said. You said humans create gravity Bjorn and your pal Fool piled on in support of you. This is going to be hilarious by the time I am done with you.

Bjorn, you took Physics, right? At least you claim that you have.

Anyway, what is gravity? Gravity is "true weight".

Again, if I take a human and put them into zero gravity, will the human generate gravity? You and Fool claim that humans do. I say that they do not. Since zero gravity reduces human weight, how can a human "generate" gravity in zero gravity?

Come on Bjorn genius. Come on smart guy. Explain it to me.

JK

7) Now we start to see his vaunted math skills at work:

Bjorn, you said humans "create gravity". If that is true, why do humans need this:

Ac = V'2/R

Why do humans need that Bjorn if humans "create gravity" in zero gravity?

Class is in session.

JK

And this page finished up with this tidbit of mathematical wisdom as well.

Bjorn, if humans create gravity, why is this [When ac = g then Fc = w] important?

Class is in session.

JK
 
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