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The Prophecy Thread (write your own prophecy)

Gold prices will continue to rise on the next two weeks.

Oil prices will decrease its ascent rate, but will suffer a couple of small decreases and then carry on with the overall continued rise tendency.

Osama bin Laden WILL NOT be captured (sensu strictu) utill the end of this year.

Bloodshed will continue in Iraq, Afghanistan and Palestine.

More hostages will be taken in Iraq.

More suicide bombings in Iraq, Israel and Afghanistan.

Trolling will continue at JREF.

Lifegazer, Kumar and IIan will carry on with their beliefs, impervious to contrary arguments.

Let it be registered that these wery specific prophecies were written in 02/11/2004, at 19:37 (summer time) in Lavras do Sul, Rio Grande do Sul State, Brazil. While having a beer with me, SATAN and GOD, that are actually part of a single entity, told me about these. BTW, if you belive or not in he/she/it/them, it really does not matters to he/she/it/them.

I DEMAND MY 1 000 000 MILLION DOLLARS, I DO NOT INTEND TO WORK ANYMORE!!! JUST ENJOY LIFE BY THE SEA!!!!
 
Bush will win.

Terorrism will continue exactly as before the election.

People will continue to fail to realise that someone saying "We will not stand for terrorism" isn't actually quite the same is it magically going away.


Never have I wanted to be proven more wrong in a prediction.
 
Prophecies for this year:

Bill O'reilly will continue to say laughably stupid things
Ann Coulter will double his stupidity with racism
John Kerry looks like that tree from Lord of the Rings
Pat Robertson will exalt Bush with his religious facism

Sylvia Brown will be mugged by Jerry Springer
FOX Hannity and Colmes will be renamed Hannity and Idiot
Yahweh will greet the man with a wave of his finger
Asthmatic Camel will continue to make me laugh with his silly s--- (hey, it's a good rhyme)

I'm the greatest psychic there has ever been
I will win the JREF Prize as foretold by Marian
 
Ashles said:
Bush will win.

Terorrism will continue exactly as before the election.

People will continue to fail to realise that someone saying "We will not stand for terrorism" isn't actually quite the same is it magically going away.

Never have I wanted to be proven more wrong in a prediction.
Click to expand...
It's like watching a man cutting his own throat, isn't it?
 
My prophecy :

There shall in that time be rumors of things going astray, and there shall be a great confusion as to where things really are, and nobody will really know where lieth those little things with the sort of raffia-work base, that has an attachment. At that time, a friend shall lose his friend's hammer, and the young shall not know where lieth the things possessed by their fathers that their fathers put there only just the night before, about eight O'clock.
 
Seismosaurus said:
My prophecy :

There shall in that time be rumors of things going astray, and there shall be a great confusion as to where things really are, and nobody will really know where lieth those little things with the sort of raffia-work base, that has an attachment. At that time, a friend shall lose his friend's hammer, and the young shall not know where lieth the things possessed by their fathers that their fathers put there only just the night before, about eight O'clock.
Click to expand...
Seismosaurus is not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy. And he doesn't acknowledge when he's cribbing from Life Of Brian.
 
I was going to post some Python quote earlier but couldnt remember past "Consider the lily"lol;)
 
Ok here's my quatrain:

The bearded man will be captured
when a light like a new star appears in the heavens
This will be followed later by a quake in the West
and a terrible plague in the East
 
THE COUNTER-REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED. Broadcasting rights will be sold at auction by a process of sealed bids to all major media conglomerates in an exciting new initiative designed to bring more choice to you the consumer in the twenty-first century by cheap men in expensive suits and women who say Ciao and their shareholders and their accountants and their auditors and their lawyers THE COUNTER-REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED. The counter-revolution will be shown in omnibus editions and Technicolor and repeats and highlights and slow motion and Fox News and Sky Sports and on the Internet and with extra violence after the nine o'clock watershed by kind permission of our sponsors the good people at Death Incorporated and their shareholders and their accountants and their auditors and their lawyers THE COUNTER-REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED. The counter-revolution will be sponsored by the makers of sportswear carbonated beverages American lager M&M's hamburgers pretzels death famine pestilence and war and the counter-revolutionaries and their accountants and their auditors and their lawyers shall wear identical grey suits with a prominent Nike swoosh sewn by illiterate half-starved children in a Burmese sweatshop and the offical beverage of the counter-revolution shall be Coca-Cola and their guns will be the result of an exiting new public-private initiative in association with a major arms dealer and as they go into battle under banners sponsored by people who sell food to make you obese and people who sell pills to make you thin and people who sell vitamin pills to prevent the food everyone else sells you from giving you scurvy anemia and rickets and people who sell high-fibre breakfast foods to cure the constipation you got from eating all the other stuff then under these banners they shall cry out with pride the names of their sponsors and their Chief Executive Officer and the major shareholders and presidents and vice-presidents and their accountants and their auditors and their lawyers such that they may be exalted even before Murdoch and Sky Sports and Fox and the name of Dubya shall be glorified in the land THE COUNTER-REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED. The counter-revolution will be lied about by pundits and sports commentators and politicians and Rupert Murdoch and spokesmen and analysts and television news and newspapers and magazines and their sponsors and their accountants and their auditors and their lawyers. The counter-revolution will give us all fresh mouth odour it will get rid of unsightly stains it will repair split ends it will cure headaches fast it will be bigger, smaller, better, cheaper, more exclusive, payable in instalments, guaranteed. The counter-revolution will be a must-see a must-have a status symbol with 20% off for one month only and 5% less fat than other counter-revolutions with added vitamins with a prestigious free gift of your choice sold to the discerning customer to the anxious housewife to the businessman in a hurry to the highest bidder for your comfort safety enjoyment and convenience. Because you're worth it. THE COUNTER-REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED.

You read it here first.
 
Dr Adequate said:
Seismosaurus is not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy. And he doesn't acknowledge when he's cribbing from Life Of Brian.
Click to expand...

I prefer to believe that they were copying from me in advance.
 
Seismosaurus said:
I prefer to believe that they were copying from me in advance.
Click to expand...

That would make them psychic. Ooooh, spooky! :p
 
A massive earthquake will hit a city in Japan.

(I hope it doesn't, but with recent news a psychic might get a hit just out of chance -- errm, as always)
 
The Dancer twirls
Perfect in her grace
Water that is life becomes death
Air steals the child's breath
The Heavens tremble upon there base
Over the Virgin the darkness swirls
 
Dr Adequate said:
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Click to expand...

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