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Religious billboards

Sundog

Master Poster
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They crack me up.

I have rarely seen one that actually tried to convince me that I should go to church. All I've ever seen are the kind with huge letters and a message something like

HAVE YOU DECLARED JESUS AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOUR?

Uhhh, no. Why do you ask?

I don't think they're actually trying to convert anyone at all. They just want to push their beliefs in your face.

The best one I saw lately though was one warning President Bush not to abandon support for Israel, promising consequences of Biblical proportions - literally.

Seen any good ones?
 
I saw one that was up for only a day before it was taken down. It was an anti-abortion sign that tried to push as many religious and emotional buttons as it could. It included a picture of a sweet, wide-eyed baby.

Someone had written on the sign with spray paint, underneath the picture of the baby: "Please don't abort me! I'M WHITE!!"
 
SATURDAY IS THE SABBATH. SUNDAY LAWS ARE THE MARK OF SATAN! For more information, call 1-800-xxxxxxx.


For real. All over Huntsville.
 
Brown said:
I saw one that was up for only a day before it was taken down. It was an anti-abortion sign that tried to push as many religious and emotional buttons as it could. It included a picture of a sweet, wide-eyed baby.

Someone had written on the sign with spray paint, underneath the picture of the baby: "Please don't abort me! I'M WHITE!!"
Click to expand...

Silly thing to say, if the baby is already born.

The important thing is to say something asinine.

-Elliot
 
Not to imaginative, but there is a couple around here that simply say "JESUS".

Whenever I'm driving in the car with my wife and I see one of those, I say (rather loudly) "JESUS" and it freaks her out until she realizes what I'm doing. I usually become a victim of spousal abuse at that point.
 
HAVE YOU DECLARED JESUS AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOUR?


No, why? Is there some sort of tax break, like with dependents?
 
Actually, I usually substitute in words.

Usually, "Nobody" fits where Jesus goes.

HAVE YOU DECLARED "Nobody" AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOUR?

"Nobody" is your savior.

"Nobody" loves you.

Aww. :)
 
The only one I can remember is a few years ago back in Winnipeg, they had signs with "Take my hand, Not my life", and the pic was of a baby's had reaching out to a very old person's hand. Very touching. There was a bunch of euthanasia debate in the news at that time. They didn't last very long. Probably the most vandalized posters in the city.
 
On I-45 North I saw a billboard that said: "Islam, Relgion of the Future".
 
"Most people want to speak to God, but many just as advisors."


Somehow that meant enough to my stepfather to quote it to me, not during a religious discussion. I'm smart enough not to get into religious discussions with people I love who are fundamentalists.

Yeah, church signs are mostly preaching to the choir, as I guess all religion is. Nobody's offering any arguments that I can see, as to why people should have religion, except the ones that require that you already believe in order to buy the argument.

I wouldn't mind a "personal betterment" argument in religion. Sadly, that seems to be missing, and replaced with strict obedience to old mythological rules. Is it me, or is religion getting more extreme?
 
JESUS... IT'S WHAT'S FOR DINNER.

"I'M BIGGER THAN JOHN LENNON" - J.C.

These were painted on a wall near my house. They made me smile.
 
Keneke said:
SATURDAY IS THE SABBATH. SUNDAY LAWS ARE THE MARK OF SATAN! For more information, call 1-800-xxxxxxx.

For real. All over Huntsville.
Click to expand...
Fighting under the insignia of the cross, Constantine defeated his last rival to become the emperor of Rome in 324 and, having unified the empire politically, he moved swiftly to do the same ecclesiastically. He convened the Council of Nicaea, where at least 250 bishops met to formulate the official articles of faith, including Jesus's place in the Holy Trinity, in the first Nicene Creed. (Those bishops who disagreed with the creed were promptly exiled.) Under his regime, Sunday became the Christian Sabbath.... - U.S. News & World Report; 08 March 2004 ed.
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Remember the Sabbath Day, to keep it holy - Exodus 20:8
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For real. All over the world.

I think of the billboards as a "Last Call" at the bar. A reminder of what's coming. We don't want the fun to end, but it will...and the lights will come on and a lot of people will say it really sucks.

Bah! Why did you wake me out of my grave? I was resting there nice and dead and you had to come along and wake me up. Then, reality hits home. And you're staring at the second life just as a proctologist examines someones bunghole. The stinky truth is before you with open arms (legs?). It will not be pleasant for some of you.

edit: to add source
 
Riddick said:
Bah! Why did you wake me out of my grave? I was resting there nice and dead and you had to come along and wake me up. Then, reality hits home. And you're staring at the second life just as a proctologist examines someones bunghole. The stinky truth is before you with open arms (legs?). It will not be pleasant for some of you.
Click to expand...
You're misinterpretation of Christianity has made you quite the optimist...
 
there is a division of thought in the school of christianity.

one school believes you go immediately to heaven or hell on death.

the other school thinks you go into a "sleep" at death --- to be awakened by christ when he returns.
 
Riddick said:
there is a division of thought in the school of christianity.

one school believes you go immediately to heaven or hell on death.

the other school thinks you go into a "sleep" at death --- to be awakened by christ when he returns.
Click to expand...

ONLY ONE??? My, what a sheltered life you live.

I can't take any particular Christian's word on what it takes to be "saved" too seriously. Christian opinions differ. Not on little things.

Some believe you go straight to heaven (or hell). Others believe you wait... and still others believe in that "beam me up nekked" rapture thing is the only way to be "saved".

What are the requirements for being "saved"?

Some believe "once saved, always saved". You get "saved", and it doesn't matter if you go to a maternity ward and douse newborn babies in gasoline and light them on fire. In fact, you'd be guaranteeing those babies go to heaven!

Others believe those babies you murdered will go to hell, since they never got a chance to "let Jesus into their hearts".

Others believe you have to actually be good, too. Being "good" varies from simple definitions to a lot of rigorous stuff, like showing up for church every single weekend and on holidays, and tithing at least a certain percentage of your income, and going out knocking on people's doors, all the way to what color pants are appropriate to be 'raptured' in.

Do you need your head dunked in water (i.e. 'baptised')? Some believe so, others not. Some believe you have to be 'born again'. (Being baptised as a baby isn't enough - you need to be baptised again.)

Still other Christians deny their brother Christians are even Christian at all. Lots of web sites dedicated to Catholics not being Christian. Some even believe that all other religions but theirs are "demon led".

I think the folks at http://www.religioustolerance.org/ have a fine quote:

Differences among Christian faith groups are so great that some observers have suggested that a useful way of classifying Christian groups is to view them as a number of separate religions with different beliefs and practices, who share:

1. The name "Christianity,"
2. The text of the Bible, and
3. Not a great deal else.
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Of course, even #2 is defective, in that there are lots of "bible" versions, some have chopped the Old Testament portion of the book out, and others still don't put much stock in the book. So maybe "2. Some misquoted bits of text here and there from the bible that suit them"?

Here's a lovely table comparing conservative Christian and Catholic positions.
http://www.religioustolerance.org/chr_capr.htm

And another happy chart comparing other christian faiths line by line with things important to catholicism.
http://www.saintaquinas.com/christian_comparison.html

And another table.
http://www.wamware.com/world-religions/comparative/

And yet another table.
http://wri.leaderu.com/wri-table2/salvation.html

And these folks cooked their table into quizzes...
http://www.beliefnet.com/
 
Although the "program" seems to be over, I often had a chuckle at a series of religious billboards with "quotes" from God. One of them said, "Keep using my name in vain and I'll make your rush hour longer." :D
 
"Seven days without prayer makes one week."

"No fire escape in hell."

"Eternity where?"
 
Sundog said:
The best one I saw lately though was one warning President Bush not to abandon support for Israel, promising consequences of Biblical proportions - literally.
Click to expand...
The pathetic part is that Bush et al may well be heeding such admonitions.
 
Not a billboard, but I remember the local dial-a-prayer, which as teens we dialed on a regular basis, always ending with "May the lord bless you really good".
 
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