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Outrage over Halloween costumes

As part of the lads culture I'll be dressing as a drunken lout. This will require me to fondle any females within reach while making lewd comments. Don't blame me, it's all just part of the costume.

If you are really going to commit to the part, you will need some vomit on the front of your shirt. Reasonable people can disagree over whether it must be dried vomit or fresh vomit. Oh, and throw one of your shoes on the rook.
 

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