Our Useless Universe

Clearly the universe is intended to be ornamental.

This means that if anyone ever notices what we've been up to, we're in big trouble.
"What are all these strip malls doing here? What is the purpose of Rush Limbaugh? Why is Seattle? Didn't there use to be dodos?"

I suggest that we at least tidy up a bit.
Ah, but that makes assumptions about priorities. What if it's the other way around?
"Why haven't they built more strip malls?" "Why do they keep wasting their time going outside when all the entertainment they need can be delivered right into their homes?" "Why haven't they jacked their brains into the internet yet?" "Why are all these animals still around?"
 
Based on my limited knowledge, the current condition of the solar system is fragile. Move one planet, star, black hole, etc and everything could be different. If you subscribe to the belief that humans evolved from microorganisms, then any changes from the current, past or future order could wreak havoc for our very existence.

But remember that the universe, while useless, is more like it is now than it ever was before.
 
It isnt a question of waste... it is what it is.

The universe isnt a project to get the "most" out of the "least"... it just is.
 
There are theories in cosmology and physics (and others in religion and philosophy) that attempt to explain various properties of the universe such as its size, its age, its curvature, and so forth. But is there any theory that can explain why it is so useless?

Useless to us... But perhaps working perfectly when viewed from the outside, in all its multidimensional glory. I have been wondering this, do the laws of nature seem "efficient" in any way? Does quantum mechanics with its superpositions and weirdness look like a clever way to go about it if you were to create a universe?

I can't imagine why anyone would need a universe though. I am probably too three-dimensional in my thinking.
 
Last edited:
But remember that the universe, while useless, is more like it is now than it ever was before.

Nonsense! The Universe has always been like this.
The apparent expansion is caused by god creating fossils and implanting them all over the place to confound Darwinists. (Mostly foraminifera, for some reason).
 
Clearly, the problem here is the speed of light—it's simply far too slow given the size of the universe. If the speed of light was, say, a million times faster than it is currently, that'd open up some possibilities. Instead of light taking about 85,000 years to cross our galaxy, it'd only take 31 days. Instead of it taking 2 million years for light to get here from the Andromeda galaxy, it'd only take two years.

So, all that need be done is have scientists figure out a way to raise the speed of light. Hey, they managed it in Futurama! :D

Given that there are other goodies besides visible light that travel at the same speed... I'm glad, and so is everyone, whether they know it or not, that the distances are enormous.
 
Of course some portions of the universe are useful. I'm talking about the vast majority of it that, as far as we know, does not contain any pretty girls

Actually, by taking the number of girls who shot me down in high school, and multiplying it by the number of divorces I've gone through in adulthood, I've come to the conclusion that over 98% of the "missing matter" in the universe is made up entirely of pretty girls.
 
Last edited:
It's much more tempting to think that you have that totally ass-backwards. Things near us are "useful" because they are near us and we can reach them, and because we evolved in or near them. Part of it is tautological, and part of it is due to the fact that we are evolved in and adapted to our immediate environment, and part of it (probably) to the fact that intelligent life capable of having this conversation can only evolve in certain environments (that's presumably why we don't live in intergalactic space, which after all makes up the vast majority of the space in the universe).

"Design" is a completely unnecessary and decidedly un-tempting hypothesis.

I see it's time for a tidy up.
My actual point was that us humans (that's me and you) made such a big fudge up of our ecosystem, that it wouldn't surprise me if some other civilisation had simply sealed us off from the rest of the universe, by warping physics a little. Personally, I wouldn't blame them.

Yes we evolved to our environment and that we are actually doing terribly well in finding brilliant uses for the most mundane of things, but all our uses for things is tearing our environment to shreds, to the point that technology is beginning to replace evolution, because all of a sudden, our environment has changed, and whoever has the cleverest technology has the biggest chance of survival (wondering what the cold war was all about still?).

So, my little theory (I suppose that's what it is now) is that we probably do the rest of the universe good to stay here on this little rock until we can intergrate technology with the ecosystem (or what's left of it). That way, we don't go blundering into other peoples ecosystems on other planets and completely screwing them over. Furthermore, it wouldn't surprise me if some other civilisation had thought of this already, and had taken the appropriate measures to make sure we would never make extraterrestrial contact until they think we are 'safe' to do so.

A lot of people, including you perhaps, may not like this notion, in which case, I did say this theory was a bit far fetched. Others, however, may agree with me, in which case, let's start on intergrating our technology with what is left of our ecosystem.

To be quite honest, whether my theory is true or not, intergrating technology and nature in a positive way is still something that needs to be done, lest we risk the chance of killing our own planet, not now perhaps, but probably some time in the future (give it a few decades)


Now this is the part where people start to argue against my theory. In truth, I didn't make it that hard now,did I?
 
Regarding the idea that we will never make more direct use of the rest of the galaxy, let alone other galaxies, I think its far too premature to say. I don't see any reason why we can't send self-replicating robots to other stars, which on arrival make use of the energy and materials there. The use we could get from that is access to that energy (for, for instance, computation, the informational products of which could be sent back to us, or for either the energy or even matter to be directly sent back to us). They could make secondary use of those same resources to move to another star and do the same thing there. Over the course of a few million years, the galaxy is "colonized", though we've never left home. You may say "we will never need all that energy" or "it will never be worth it", which may be true, but may not be true, so an argument based on some idea to know one way or the other is flawed from the beginning.

Sounds familiar

http://www.fourmilab.ch/documents/tipler.html
 
I think we're the useless bi-product of the universe, rather than vice versa. The drops that condense on the outside of my long island don't complain that the long island is useless.

Edit: I just realized that droplets aren't nearly as snotty as we are, I think their culture is more relaxed. Probably due to it's proximity to liquor.
 
Last edited:
You make the question sound more difficult than it is.

There are theories in cosmology and physics (and others in religion and philosophy) that attempt to explain various properties of the universe such as its size, its age, its curvature, and so forth. But is there any theory that can explain why it is so useless?

Assuming that it is, in fact, useless: Because it cannot be used (i.e. it fits the definition of "useless").

Why is a theory necessary to explain this?
 
If it takes vast light years of space, a hundred billion galaxies, a hundred gazillion stars, and a whole universe full of energy just to create little ol' me--I personally don't find that useless.;)
 
Yeah, but IF it is a god created artifact then all bets are off! All the usable real estate apart from earth is a billion light years away? no problem, use your god powered spaceship and get there in minutes! 50 million years down the line and Sol is going to explode? Not a problem, you have a whole universe to inhabit!

oops! I forgot that my original religio-indoctrination has mankind living eternally in this physical universe, as perfect but human beings. I guess that if all intelligent beings are going to end up either in heaven or in hell, then the universe is pretty damn useless, even for a believer!
 
Last edited:

Back
Top Bottom