Cont: Mueller Investigation pt3

[Darat]

Wohl and Burkman say “On or about October 1, 2018, Carolyn Cass reached out to Surefire Intelligence...” Except Surefire didn’t exist until October 9​

How would they not have the exact date she contacted an intelligence firm? Seems like something they should have taken notes about at the least.

He's heard it on a TV lawyer show and thinks it sounds real professional like.

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1058034843383185408

The Q&A is getting heated! Jacob Burkman defends Jacob Wohl's age: "Jacob is a child prodigy who has eclipsed Mozart."

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

They claim Cass was afraid to go to the authorities because Mueller had identified himself as an FBI agent. A member of the press points out that they had previously claimed that Mueller had said he was a police officer. Wohl replies that he first identified himself as a policeman, then as from the FBI.

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

Wohl is asked where Cass went to school - obviously looking to be able to verify she exists - and replies that she went to school all over the world. When asked to identify specific schools, he names NYU and one other that I didn't catch.

 

[Stacko]

https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1058034843383185408

A heckler brings up Wohl's lifetime ban from futures trading: "He can't even open an eTrade account!"​

 

[Belz...]

Wohl claims that the story from 2010 that Mueller was on jury duty on the same day that this claimed assault happened elsewhere is irrelevant because "sometimes people are on jury duty and there's elsewhere, too".

I'm frequently at two places at once, too.

 

[Stacko]

Wohl is now yelling at reporters for calling his mom and teenage sisters — although this is only because he used his family phone plan for his "intelligence firm."

Wohl: “You called underage teens over and over again!”
Burkman: “Making calls to 11-year olds! That’s pretty bad”​

What a prodigy! Man, it must suck to be related to this dumbass.

 

[Darat]

I'm frequently at two places at once, too.

It's all quantum! Ever since that damned cat we've never known where we were.

 

[carlitos]

"Jacob is a child prodigy who has eclipsed Mozart."

1756, Salzburg, January 27, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is born
1761, at the age of five Amadeus begins composing
1773, he writes his first piano concerto
1782, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart marries Constance Weber
1784, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart becomes a free mason
1791, Mozart composes "The Magic Flute"
On December 5th of that same year, Mozart dies

1985, Austrian rock singer Falco records
Rock Me Amadeus!
Amadeus!
Amadeus!
Amadeus!
Amadeus!
Amadeus!

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

Asked how Cass found Sureifre, when it had no presence, Wohl says "over the internet", and when pressed says it might have been a Craigslist ad.

 

[Shalamar]

The. Best. People.

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

Buckman promises another press conference soon.

Also: https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1058037108206657536

Burkman and Wohl appear to have no idea how to spell their client's first name. They insist it's Carolyn — but then after reporters ask them, they say it's Carolyne with an E.

 

[Stacko]

Asked how Cass found Sureifre, when it had no presence, Wohl says "over the internet", and when pressed says it might have been a Craigslist ad.

It's where all the best intelligence agencies advertise.

 

[Shalamar]

Asked how Cass found Sureifre, when it had no presence, Wohl says "over the internet", and when pressed says it might have been a Craigslist ad.

This.. This can't be serious, right?

The Onion is holding the press conference and is trolling us.. right?

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

https://twitter.com/oneunderscore__/status/1058031969454436352

One of the new details @BrandyZadrozny found:

Jacob Wohl’s website was previously owned by Malia Zimmerman, the woman who authored the retracted Fox News report on Seth Rich.

 

[I Am The Scum]

Wohl is fuming again that someone photoshopped him into a corncob: "One of them had a picture of corn!"

https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1058036578902249472

For anyone who's curious, the artistic expression was likely a reference to this classic Twitter joke:

"im not owned! im not owned!!", i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob

https://twitter.com/dril/status/134787490526658561

 

[Stacko]

Burkman and Wohl appear to have no idea how to spell their client's first name. They insist it's Carolyn — but then after reporters ask them, they say it's Carolyne with an E.​

Ken White said it best, "2018 is a daily struggle not to be offended by how dumb some people apparently think we are."

 

[Squeegee Beckenheim]

This.. This can't be serious, right?

I'm certainly not taking it seriously, if that helps.

 

[Shalamar]

I'm certainly not taking it seriously, if that helps.

Alas... I suspect that some people are.

 

[Belz...]

"Jacob is a child prodigy who has eclipsed Mozart."

Ok, who's the idiot who said that?