Maori healing ..ooOoOo!

DavoMan

Critical Thinker
Joined
Aug 31, 2004
Messages
424
I saw documentry segment on tv tonight about this "Papa Joe" and his team of 'Maori Healers'. Okay I thought this would just be some kinda wacko 'touch' healing thing.

But no.

I tuned in and saw a bunch of huge maori guys (maori guys are often real big - both muscle & fat) jumping on this guys leg.

It got worse - it then showed the same guy in a severe headlock & then him lying on his back & some huge maori guy stomping on his back. Another shot was of this guy totally crying. 'Oh yeah I feel so healed now'.

The doco wasnt skeptical in the slightest. To me it was quite disheartening. Full of these 'spriritual' stereotypes going on about how 'science is so limited. what we offer goes beyond the physical'.

They had testimonials from people claiming to previously be infertile until visiting this 'Papa Joe' guy & his team.

I found a web page on it:
http://www.spiritwinds.net/maori_healers.html

It seems like something Mr Randi (& you guys) would be interested in.
 
All Black and Blue

Violent massage is a Polynesian tradition, IIRC my looooooon-ago reading. Early accounts from Hawaii tell about noblemen being "beaten" by trained slaves as they went to sleep.

It must feel so good when they stop.
 
DavoMan said:
They had testimonials from people claiming to previously be infertile until visiting this 'Papa Joe' guy & his team.

Yikes! I don't want to ponder what that treatment might involve!
 
Yeah I heard somewhere that its in polynesian culture to smack their kids quite brutally & often. The times I've lived next door to Samoans etc it has certainly seemed that way.

Just for the record maoris and polynesians are different peoples. ;) And I don't wish to typecast maori or pacific island people as mean huge ◊◊◊◊◊◊◊◊ that stomp on people. They arent.

This whole healing thing is another matter though. It just reminds me from primary-school days when the kids were scared of the huge samoan guy cos he dwarfed the other kids.

Ya should have seen this guy getting the treatment though. He was a full grown MAN (note capital letters) and was totally sobbing & crying.

I mean what the hell. Sure people cry in therapy etc but crying after being in a headlock for 20 minutes? He was also smiling in some footage going 'yeah! im ok dont worry!'

I just don't understand.....Or is it that I understand & think its all crap? I can't decide...
 
DavoMan said:
...Just for the record maoris and polynesians are different peoples. ...

[derail like a maniac) That's some record. Maoris speak an Eastern Polynesian language and had Polynesian customs before they got religion and covered up all the cute girls' TTs.

Wait, you were making an inside joke, right? Maoris like to kid about how different they from, say, Samoans or Tahitians or Hawaiians. Eh? [/derail]

No, not all Polynesians are hugely fat. They just hide behind the ones who are.

Toa Ao Te Aroha!
 
sackett said:
[derail like a maniac) That's some record. Maoris speak an Eastern Polynesian language and had Polynesian customs before they got religion and covered up all the cute girls' TTs.

Wait, you were making an inside joke, right? Maoris like to kid about how different they from, say, Samoans or Tahitians or Hawaiians. Eh? [/derail]

No, not all Polynesians are hugely fat. They just hide behind the ones who are.

Toa Ao Te Aroha!
Yeah I admit I'm not the most knowledgable about them. Ive certainly been trained (oops I mean raised) to treat them as different peoples.

But yeah - shame about that TTs bit. Damn christians and their guilts.
 
There's something to be said for vigorous massage, but the more I learn about physical therapy -- and anatomy -- the less I trust untrained practitioners.

We have enough back trouble around our house to make me get serious about this stuff. Amateurs can do a lot of damage -- and they still expect to be paid for it.

Maybe if you weigh 150 kilos, you don't feel a pounding the way a skimpy little pakeha would?
 
Usually the case is when little DavoMan gets pounded by a big Falli, big Falli gets a beating from somewhere else. Maybe a bigger Fali than big Fali.
 
Re: All Black and Blue

sackett said:
Violent massage is a Polynesian tradition, IIRC my looooooon-ago reading. Early accounts from Hawaii tell about noblemen being "beaten" by trained slaves as they went to sleep.

It must feel so good when they stop.

BDSM anyone?

Move over, Marquis de Sade -- the Polynesians approacheth.
 
The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank you.

A little story told me by Captain Murray of the Manushka while anchored in a bay of Lake Te Anau:

Years ago, Capt. Murray was on a crew building shelters along the Milford Track. The crew included a young lad from Holland and a middle-aged Maori. During a tea-break, the three huddled under a tree trying to stay out of the wet wind. The Maori (he didn’t have facial tattoos, but he’d spent a hard life working and drinking in the out of doors, and he was grizzled, black, battered, and splay-toothed) studied the Dutch kid for a while and then asked in ripest En Zed dialect, “Arr, a Dootchman are ye?”

“Yes, please, I am Dutch,” answered the kid.

“Arr, I’m part Dootch, ye know,” said the Maori.

“Really? You – you are part Dutch?” asked the kid timidly.

“Oh aye,” said the Maori, grinning enormously. “Me grand-da ate one.”

The Dutch kid’s eyes rolled back in his head and he fainted dead away. Well, I don’t blame him, under the circumstances. I think most Maoris would be insulted if you suggested that their ancestors weren’t cannibals. I said they were Polynesians.
 
Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank you.

sackett said:
then asked in ripest En Zed dialect, “Arr, a Dootchman are ye?”

“Yes, please, I am Dutch,” answered the kid.

“Arr, I’m part Dootch, ye know,” said the Maori.

“Really? You – you are part Dutch?” asked the kid timidly.

“Oh aye,” said the Maori, grinning enormously. “Me grand-da ate one.”

Och...aye...part Dutch...or parrrrrrt Scottish?!
 
Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank you.

pyewhackett said:
Och...aye...part Dutch...or parrrrrrt Scottish?!

The dialect in the South Island, especially down in Fiordland and around Dunedin, is quite Scots in flavour.

So are the fresh-baked date scones in Invercargill on a chilly morning. Oh, carry me back to ole noo zeelan'!
 
Re: Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank you.

sackett said:
The dialect in the South Island, especially down in Fiordland and around Dunedin, is quite Scots in flavour.

The NZ accent has significantly raised vowels, not lowered.

Unless you are talking of some piratesque, porridge and haggis munching enclave!
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank yo

pyewhackett said:
...you are talking of some piratesque, porridge and haggis munching enclave!

That's it exactly, if a large chunk of a big island can be called an enclave.

Somebody told me matter-of-factly that Dunedin IS Scotland. I'd like to visit Scotland to verify that, but for now I'll take his word.

Just a few more posts and I'll have wrenched this thread completely away from the original poster. Then I can ramble on for years about my other native country. Away, away to the Land of the Long White Cloud!
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread. Thank yo

sackett said:
Just a few more posts and I'll have wrenched this thread completely away from the original poster. Then I can ramble on for years about my other native country. Away, away to the Land of the Long White Cloud!

Then we can get all rivalrous and I can make sheep jokes and the like, 'cause I'm of Godzone.
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread.

pyewhackett said:
Then we can get all rivalrous and I can make sheep jokes and the like, 'cause I'm of Godzone.

You're from the West Island? Aw jeeze, I'm sorry! I didn't know!
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The following contributes absolutely nothing to this thread.

sackett said:
You're from the West Island? Aw jeeze, I'm sorry! I didn't know!

Tich. I know the Kiwi educational system is ficked...but surely not this bad!

I am talking about The Mainland!
 

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