Los Angeles Conscious Life Expo

[billw]

http://2012.consciouslifeexpo.com/october-2012-expo/october-2012-home-page.html

A glossy program guide showed up in today's mail, suspiciously addressed to an unknown person. Don't think I've ever seen so many different flavors of woo conveniently available under one roof:

Thirteen thousand years ago a group of high angels called Seraphim created a cosmology that humanity could use for its 'well-being and evolution.' Atlantean priests first cognized this system. Then the early Hebrews re-cognized these energies and created the Kabbalah. In modern times the energies resurfaced in 1994 when one of the original Seraphim contacted Ruth Rendely, a meditation instructor.
The Seraphim Blueprint is a cosmological collection of energies that are permanently stored in the ethers. The Seraphim that created this system chose to give out these energies in a specific sequence that harmoniously integrates with our nervous systems.
The system includes 11 major energies that synergistically interact to enhance our life-force energy and well-being. Each major energy has its own purpose and distinct quality that together provides a unique evolutionary pathway for Self-Realization.
The energies are safe and intelligent and are pre-programmed to ideally adapt to our unique life situation and physical condition. They work on all levels of our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual bodies.

# # #

Extraterrestrial’s True Interest in Us! Ron has an unparalleled understanding of what we are facing. Attend this highly informative lecture covering: Implants, Abductions, Tracking, Barcodes, Human Cloning, Robotic Body Programs, Planetary-Zodiac Connection, Satellite Mind Control Transmissions, Channeling through Humans, the significance off Timelines and the relationship of Future/Past/Parallel Lives to your current lifetime. Bonus -bring a bottle of drinking water to be activated with Living Light Energy.

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Dr. James Capers will demonstrate his clairvoyant spiritual abilities during this lecture. Members of the audience will be picked randomly to receive messages, spiritual assessments, and aura readings. Dr Capers will also identify animal totems, reveal soul mates and much more. Dr. Capers will be choosing new apprentices during His lecture.

Dr. Capers is an accomplished Mega Super Star Clairvoyant. His clients include Royal Family members, heads of State, CEOs, Hollywood celebrities, and more. He has been filmed for television in China, Japan and Europe.

Dr. Capers, “World Famous Para-Normal Psychologist,” has uncovered new Metaphysical evidence, that establishes clear lines of communication regarding 2012 dating back to 2600 B.C. Come hear the world famous clairvoyant Dr. James Capers as he gives detailed information regarding the Ancient Secret Sleep Chambers of the Maya High Priest. Learn how he opened up a “Time Portal Vertex,” to an ancient High Priest “Chaan-Bahlum– Mo.”

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In this 1½ hour powerful, dynamic workshop, Zarathustra will open The Portal to the 5th Dimension, reconnecting you to Source Energy, and building a bridge to your Inner Wisdom and Divine Self. Using Active Meditations, Transformative Spiritual Understandings, combined with High-Frequency 3rd Eye Activations and Shamanic Healing to deeply Alchemize your Consciousness and heal your Mental, Emotional and Physical Body, ultimately Awakening you to 5th Dimensional Vibrational Frequency…bringing you back to that place of Silence and Stillness within your Being…where the “real you” exists.

After 25 years of seeking Truth, Zarathustra started receiving downloads from Entities identifying themselves as “5th Dimensional Guides” giving him the ability to perform Psychic Surgery, exhibit “X-Ray Vision” and also turned his right hand into a High-Frequency Transmitter. Now, by Divine Guidance, Zarathustra, Internationally known Founder of 5th Dimensional Quantum Healing emerges to lead our Consciousness to the 5th Dimension.

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Tree’s are stepping forward to assist humans at this time of our great awakening. They have been our wisdom teachers throughout history. Learn the sacred polarity ratio in all of nature- THE KEY to humanities FULL remembering and abilities. Imagine a human moving from 4% to 100% operating capacity!. Learn more of what the Tree’s are saying and how to develop your own communication with Nature. Nature Infused Vibe Bracelet to all who attend.

Kaitlyn’s communication with Trees started when one saved her life at 5yrs old. She teaches us that common sense, science and the magical experiences are all coming our way.

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In the way of Mineral Spirit Medicines, crystals teach and heal us. Each chakra and cell has a vibration and each crystal or stone has a vibration that either works to activate or diminish the natural healing consciousness of the body. Hear your inner power of “crystal listening” as they provide a powerful source of vibrational medicine into your world. Rev. Bankins, founder of The Crystal Matrix, will teach simple, useful healing techniques.

Patricia Asheme Bankins, a born intuitive, is an international trance channel. She has studied with Apache, Lakota and Incan medicine teachers and Tibetan shamans. She teaches crystals, Reiki, shamanism, channeling and Past Life Integration.

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In a lavishly-illustrated, 90-minute presentation, Hoagland will marshal compelling new evidence, compiled directly from NASA’s current “Curiosity” rover mission, that 2012 could finally be The “Year of Disclosure” of current Life on Mars! Using official Curiosity images that have been quietly“ leaked” since its spectacularly successful landing August 5th – images showing unmistakable evidence of intelligently designed artifact, half-buried in the sands all around the Rover, and astonishing geometric ruins far beyond -- Hoagland will explore a possible near-term “real world” political scenario, based on these amazing images, in which President Barack Obama, in a classic “October Surprise”, suddenly announces, just before the coming November election, that NASA has, indeed, “scientifically confirmed the existence of current ‘Life on Mars’”… with specific hints at “more discoveries to come”

There's plenty more where that came from, but we are probably already deep into TL;DR territory.....

 

[AvalonXQ]

I wonder if a skeptic organization could get a booth there.

 

[Resume]

I wonder if a skeptic organization could get a booth there.

I'm thinking no.

 

[xtifr]

Might depend on how you phrased the application. "Awesome secrets of the ancient mystics revealed!" might get you in if you don't mention that what you're going to reveal is how the trick is done.

 

[Bikewer]

When you see things like this, you wonder just how widespread this nonsense is. It mostly seems to have faded from the mainstream, when major TV shows were having trance channellers and pyramid-power loons on....
But obviously there's enough of a core audience to keep these people in business, and to allow them to keep coming up with new woo...
My kid's wife is involved in the neo-pagan scene, and once a year or so we go down to the local New Age shop to buy her a gift certificate. She likes the incense...
While there, I always glance at the poster board for upcoming classes and the latest books and such.
Much like the above, the list is rather ....Amazing.
Do these folks make any money from this stuff? Do they live a sort of gypsy existence, going from little workshop to NA shop "class" to big annual expo?
Or are they raking it in?

 

[Marchidian]

My new favorite sentence is "The system includes 11 major energies that synergistically interact to enhance our life-force energy and well-being", because I think you need the mindset of a believer to come up with this crap. Good grief, it's like a stupid-singularity.

 

[Resume]

My new favorite sentence is "The system includes 11 major energies that synergistically interact to enhance our life-force energy and well-being", because I think you need the mindset of a believer to come up with this crap. Good grief, it's like a stupid-singularity.

Personally I like these two: "Kaitlyn’s communication with Trees started when one saved her life at 5yrs old. She teaches us that common sense, science and the magical experiences are all coming our way."

 

[lylfyl]

On the plus side, it made me realize the etymology of the word "recognize". So you can't say it's completely useless.