I'm going to Hell ?!? No Fair !

[TheMashiah]

I just delved into that wonderful book of fairy tales ,the Bible, and it says an illegitimate child shall not be accepted into the kingdom of god. So basically my dad was an ass so I go to Hell. Wee thanks Dad.

 

[Upchurch]

So basically my dad was an ass so I go to Hell.

Wow. What a basta....

um...

Nevermind.

 

[Skeptical Greg]

I just delved into that wonderful book of fairy tales ,the Bible, and it says an illegitimate child shall not be accepted into the kingdom of god. So basically my dad was an ass so I go to Hell. Wee thanks Dad.

Do you have the Book, Chapter and verse/s for that.? It would come in handy..

 

[Phil]

I just delved into that wonderful book of fairy tales ,the Bible, and it says an illegitimate child shall not be accepted into the kingdom of god. So basically my dad was an ass so I go to Hell. Wee thanks Dad.

That's not all. When illegitimate children arrive in hell, they must buy the first round. It's a little known by-law of the ancient charter for hell.

I'll be at the last barstool to your right, and I drink whiskey neat.

 

[c4ts]

Didn't you hear? Zeus will punish you for your parents' hubris!

 

[Lord Kenneth]

You gonna go to hell, boy! You gonna go to hell and BURN!

 

[Chanileslie]

I just delved into that wonderful book of fairy tales ,the Bible, and it says an illegitimate child shall not be accepted into the kingdom of god. So basically my dad was an ass so I go to Hell. Wee thanks Dad.

That's okay because all the cool and interesting people will probably all be in hell with you, and all the boring fuddy-duddies will be in heaven boring each other for eternity. I'd rather be at the party, all the best literature, most interesting people, and the best... um, well anyway, you will see when you get there.

 

[Landis]

technically, Jesus was a Bastard if you buy the fairy tale. I guess you can hang out in hell with him.

 

[ShottleBop]

Are you referring to Deuteronomy 23:2?

Deuteronomy 23
2 A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD; even to his tenth generation shall he not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

That does not consign illegitimate children to hell. It prohibits the children of prohibited relationships from becoming members of the Jewish congregation. (There is some controversy over whether the word translated by the KJV folks as "bastard" really referred to the child of a union between a Jewish father and a pagan mother, or some other prohibited relationship.)

 

[Yahweh]

Hey, I'm going to Hell also!

Enjoy your vacation in Hell!

 

[evildave]

I'm not going to any "Hell". I'm going to farie-land, where the dreams of dreams dreamy dreams.

(Wiggling fingers and making woo sounds...)

 

[UnrepentantSinner]

Yes, as I have read the Bible, there are no Fairs in Hell. Neither are there Carnivals, Block Parties or Amusment Parks. Basically, if you want one final corny dog, fried pickle or funnel cake, you'd better have it on your way to the hospital.