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If you believed in a goddess, what would she be like?

sackett

Barely Tolerated Lampooneer
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Practically everybody here comes from an Abrahamic society, i.e., we all think like Jews, Christians, or Moslems. We focus on a male deity, specifically one descended from a Bronze Age Semitic sky-god. You may believe in the guy or disbelieve in him, but you sure as hell think of him as a god, not a goddess.

I think that's a lopsided religious universe. We make deities to meet our needs, and our needs certainly include the feminine, the female, the goddess if you will. Look how many Catholics worship Mary almost to the point of disregarding God and Jesus. Look how many Hindus gladly believe in and worship Kali and Durga, and probably a raft of others I don't know about.

So: If you believed in a goddess, say just one (it makes Abrahamic folks uncomfortable to imagine multiple deities), what would she be like?
 
Angelina Jolie

....she would appear to her believers in their dreams :)
 
I've always been partial to Athena/Minerva: Her sphere of patronage; war
strategy, wisdom and handicrafts is an interesting combo (and I like owls
too!). And who doesn't love a heavily-armed chick in a "toga"*?

*Well, OK, more likely a Greek "himation" but most folks can relate to "toga"
more readily.
 
I know exactly what my goddess looks like. She’s a large black woman with an enormous ‘fro like a cloud of black cotton. She’s built just right, soft but springy. She lies naked at her ease inside a dark grotto, on a bed of ever-sweet flowers and herbs. When I’m feeling down, I crawl in there, and she greets me in a large contralto voice, like this:

“Hello, handsome, and where you been so long? Just shuck off all those clothes, ‘cause I like my babies naked. Now lie down, right up here. Yes, lie down all the way. You like that, don’t you? I like it too. Mhm. Mhm. You can stay right here just as long as you want, and come back just as often you please.

“And honey, when it comes your time to die, don’t worry about a thing. You’ll come here to me and lie down to sleep where it’s warm, yes, right where I want you to be.”

When I leave, she gives me a big slice of sweet potato pie to take away. That’s my goddess. Too bad about yours.
 
What makes you assume the god I don't believe in is male?
 
Jewish women used to have a fertility centered around YHWH'S wife.

sackett said:
Practically everybody here comes from an Abrahamic society, i.e., we all think like Jews, Christians, or Moslems. We focus on a male deity, specifically one descended from a Bronze Age Semitic sky-god. You may believe in the guy or disbelieve in him, but you sure as hell think of him as a god, not a goddess.

I think that's a lopsided religious universe. We make deities to meet our needs, and our needs certainly include the feminine, the female, the goddess if you will. Look how many Catholics worship Mary almost to the point of disregarding God and Jesus. Look how many Hindus gladly believe in and worship Kali and Durga, and probably a raft of others I don't know about.

So: If you believed in a goddess, say just one (it makes Abrahamic folks uncomfortable to imagine multiple deities), what would she be like?
Click to expand...


I forget her name but jewish women had a cult centered around Gods wife. Rabbis put a halt to it though.
 
Very generally speaking, both monotheistic deities and strictly male dominated pantheons are a (relatively) new phenomenon in human history, with animal and nature worship followed by female-themed fertility goddesses during the birth of agricultural stages being mainly prevalent.
 
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If you believed in a goddess, what would she be like?


MOM!​

By the time the Lord made mothers, He was into his sixth day of working overtime. ​

An Angel appeared and said "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"​

And the Lord answered and said, "Have you seen the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold three children at one time and that disappears when she stands up, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands."​

The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. "Six pairs of hands! No Way!", said the Angel. ​

The Lord replied, "Oh, it's not the hands that are the problem. It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers must have!"​

"And that's just on the standard model?" the Angel asked. ​

The Lord nodded in agreement, "Yep, one pair of eyes are to see through the closed door as she asks her children what they are doing even though she already knows. Another pair in the back of her head, are to see what she needs to know even though no one thinks she can. And the third pair are here in the front of her head. They are for looking at an errant child and saying that she understands and loves him or her without even saying a single word."​

The Angel tried to stop the Lord. "This is too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."​

"But I can't!" The Lord protested, "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she's sick AND can feed a family of six on a pound of hamburger and can get a nine year old to stand in the shower."​

The Angel moved closer and touched the woman, "But you have made her so soft, Lord."​

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."​

"Will she be able to think?", asked the Angel.​

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason, and negotiate."​

The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak with this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."​

"That's not a leak." The Lord objected. "That's a tear."​

"What's the tear for?" the Angel asked.​

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her disappointment, her pain, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."​

The Angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything; for mothers are truly amazing!"

The Lord looked somber ... "I didn't put it there."​


~by Erma Bombeck~​
 
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I'd tell you, but I don't have the right to take her name in vain.
 
Fnord said:
If you believed in a goddess, what would she be like?


MOM!​

By the time the Lord made mothers, he was into his sixth day of working overtime.

An Angel appeared and said "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
​
Click to expand...



The glurge, it burns!​
 
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