How to deal with Pentecostals?

ExMinister said:
God hates teasing bald guys so much he sends a bunch of bears after a group of kids, but people can commit murder and rape and no bears. No lightning strikes, not even a divine slap on the hand. Yeah, that makes sense.

I guess God does work in mysterious ways...
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Simon39759 said:
He just has a different set of priorities...
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Maybe He's bald and really, really sensitive about it.
 
Zelenius said:
I honestly did not know just how fanatical, insane and pushy Pentecostals could be until a family member and his wife converted. He had been a Catholic his entire life, but now he claims the Catholic Church services are "cold" and "boring". He was very recently baptized into a Pentecostal church and has been raving like a lunatic about how amazing this church is. He has been pushing his new found faith on me and everyone else in the family(he seems not so much a "born-againer" as a person who has switched denominations, although he sounds an awful lot like a "born-againer").
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You should send him an article on how to proselytize his new religion politely; I found this one on a religious site, it should be helpful: http://www.randi.org/site/index.php/swift-blog/942-if-this-be-selling.html
 
steve s said:
[Fundy response]

1)God works in mysterious ways.

2)Ours is not to wonder why.

3)God has his reasons.

[/Fundy response]
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[More Fundy Response]

4)Obviously, you hate God.

5)Obviously, you've not received the Holy Spirit.

6)Obviously, you've not accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour.

7)Obviously, you must be:

- an atheist

- gay or a lesbian

- a communist

- demon-possessed

- a liberal

- humanist

- sent by Satan

- all of the above

[/More Fundy Response]
 
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When Im faced with fundamentalists I usually just ask them a series of questions until they go away. Stuff like:

Do I look retarded to you?
Can you see a scar from a massive head injury?
Do you think I maybe overdosed on stupid drugs this morning?
Are you implying that in my youth my mother held my head under water long enough to cause serious brain injury?

etc etc etc, until they get the point. These people so far down the rabbit hole that there is no hope. Best to just approach the situation with some humour and ridicule, then move on with your life.

BTW, I usually pose the same set of questions to the scientology morons outside the local dianetics centre when stopped. That's always fun too :)
 
Elizabeth I said:
Maybe He's bald and really, really sensitive about it.
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I once researched this subject and found that the Hebrew word is either better translated young men than kids or referred to young men and not kids. Not that I'm trying to convince you about the punishment. Only that tagging them as kids is not really necessarily correct. Neither do we know the bacvkround of these young hooligans. Nor can we read their hearts and intentions. Assuming that the biblical God is described as capable of that-then leaving it to his discretion would be the wiser choice.


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“Should Elisha Be Blamed for the Death of These ‘Children’?




by Roger Kovaciny on September 14th, 2008

I'm glad you asked, since I'm a full-time professional Bible translator who also taught beginning Hebrew for seven years.

In the first place, it doesn't say the bears tore them "to pieces," but only mauled them.

In the second place, the word "children" was used of Joseph when he was 28 years old, so it's a mistranslation. They weren't children; this was a gang of toughs.

In the third place, the text shows that they had surrounded him. How does it show that? Well, there are two separate Hebrew words for "bald." When they said "Go up, thou bald head," they were using the word for someone who is bald in back, and therefore this wasn't just a group of juvenile delinquents who saw him coming and mocked him on the way into their city; they were both in front of and behind him.

And in the fourth place, there was the nature of what they said. "Go up." Elijah had already ascended into heaven. They were telling him to do the same thing--to go up, to leave the earth, therefore to die. They were cursing him. You know what happens when you're the lone person (and an unarmed old man at that) in a crowd of 42 juvenile delinquents who are mocking and cursing you and wishing you would die. You are shortly going to be subject to extreme violence and possibly death. So the Lord created a distraction in the form of angry she-bears and the prophet could carry out his mission.
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BTW

The prophet was going uphill, perhaps exhausted, maybe with pain in his aged joints.
I can sympathize with that. I was once very ill while attending church and some kids began to laugh and joke about it. Regretably I responded with angry words.
 
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Radrook said:
I once researched this subject and found that the Hebrew word is either better translated young men than kids or referred to young men and not kids. Not that I'm trying to convince you about the punishment. Only that tagging them as kids is not really necessarily correct.

Anyway, the prophet was going uphill, perhaps exhausted, maybe with pain in his aged joints.
I can sympathize with that. I was once very ill while attending church and some kids began to laugh and joke about it. Regretably I responded with angry words.
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Good for you; your prophet and god would've slaughtered those kids.
 
Radrook said:
I once researched this subject and found that the Hebrew word is either better translated young men than kids or referred to young men and not kids. Not that I'm trying to convince you about the punishment. Only that tagging them as kids is not really necessarily correct. Neither do we know the bacvkround of these young hooligans. Nor can we read their hearts and intentions. Assuming that the biblical God is described as capable of that-then leaving it to his discretion would be the wiser choice.


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BTW

The prophet was going uphill, perhaps exhausted, maybe with pain in his aged joints.
I can sympathize with that. I was once very ill while attending church and some kids began to laugh and joke about it. Regretably I responded with angry words.
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They went from kids to young men to hooligans with evil intent all in one paragraph!
 
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