Ok, the reason being is a few years ago a used to do divination to try and contact God and ask for signs etc this all revolved around 'God did you create me as academically stupid and unintelligent' and this totally freaked me out. I'll tell you why -
Basically I started writing out prayers a few years ago and asking God to answer me by writing yes and no on two seperate peices of paper, folding them up and throwing them onto the floor and asking God to guide me to which ever one I pick up first as being his answer without knowing where yes and no was. The two questions I asked through this method of divination were 'do you love me' and 'did you create me as academically stupid and unintelligent.' Where it gets complicated is I then wrote out a prayer asking God 'do you only answer me specifically' and I got 12 yes' in a row. When I looked back on the prayers (I always wrote them down and kept them and there was about 3 books worth) the specific prayers were all answered as yes (for the two questions* 'do you love me' and did you create me as academically stupid and unintelligent). I also used to ask God 'if such and such happens e.g 'if the next song on the radio is madonna for example it would mean you are answering my prayer and the answer is yes you are stupid and unintelligent and the song was madonna (totally freaked me out, and there are many more things I predicted as being a sign from God). Another time I had a CD on and said God if the next part skips on a certain part of the song it will mean yes to my question and it actually skipped on that part of the song. Another time I said God if I crash my car it will mean yes to my question and a few days later I had a crash. I know it all sounds irrational and believe me im not overly superstitious but these things have obviously spooked me and there are too many weird coincidences for it to be just a coincidence but maybe that's all it was.
So I went to see a medium seeking help called Brian and he told me that yes there is a possibility that God did answer you.
Hence why I am now trying to debunk all religious beliefs. I then went to see this medium and he made the beliefs more real .... now as you can imagine I have crippling low self worth and esteem and just want to debunk psychics so I can know that what the medium said wasn't the truth
This all sounds very familiar to me. I've done quite similar things because of my OCD, and yes, there have been some shockingly accurate coincidences along the way. However, there have also been many "misses." I remember them when I allow myself to really think about it. Once, I flipped a coin 5 times and got "heads" all five times. That is pretty improbable from a statistical perspective, so I felt the answer to my question - I believe it was something medical that time - was surely a resounding yes.
But it wasn't. The thing I was asking about never happened. Other times, with other things, it did. Still other times, I don't really know whether it did or not. People with OCD tend to search for patterns, often to the point that it tortures them. With me, I think I can't always handle the anxiety of all life's unknowns, so I try to invent these rituals to give me some sense of guidance and meaning. It's still a problem I have, but once I managed to separate the rituals from the notion of an all-controlling God, the stakes felt lower. I hope that makes sense?
Here's something else I've thought about that might help. People with OCD and similar conditions do stuff like what you described above
a lot. Because we do it so much, because we're always looking for patterns, we're bound to notice more coincidences and "hits" than the average person. It's not because forces are communicating with us. It's because we're always seeking these patterns and answers, so every time a little coincidence happens, we notice it. And every time some kind of life event happens (like a car crash), we already have some meaning ready to be ascribed to it. That's just how our minds work. So it's not that spiritual forces are causing these events. It's just that we notice them because we're always looking.
That was a bit rambly, but I hope it might help.
I am so glad I've found this site and for your advice, it's gold dust to me 
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