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Holy semen...........

catsmate

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catsmate
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[Not sure if this should go in R&P or SI&CE; plumped for here as the lunacy involved is at least partially religious in nature]

From the BBC (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/8644637.stm)
An Israeli man has been imprisoned for 10 years for tricking women into sexual acts by claiming his semen was holy and had healing powers.

Nissim Aharon, a former employee at the Israeli defence ministry, was convicted of rape, sodomy, indecent acts and aggravated fraudulent acquisition.

Women paid him large sums of money, believing he was a holy rabbi who could heal body and soul, the court said.

Judges called his actions "monstrous", exploiting "women young and old".

The sentence was the result of a plea bargain, and was handed down at Petah Tikvah district court.

Under it, Aharon will also have to pay 100,000 Israeli shekels ($26,866) to each of five women who filed the complaint against him.
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So no jail time? Just a hundred grand fine?
 
If all the women agreed to be with him of their own choice, it sounds like pick up lines that might work in that part of the world to me ....
 
Considering our ridiculously short lifespan, ten years is a long time. That'll learn im! : )
 
Well, he died con and sold them a "defective product" as he was not really a Rabbi with magical healing powers.

In contrast with the other magical rabbis out there, I suppose...
 
On a side note, my semen really is magical and can heal all kinds of things and even bring good luck and wealth to the right woman. I can be found in Iowa...
 
Reminds me of a joke which propriety forbids me to repeat in whole but whose punch line is "That SOB. He told me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for years."
 
paiute said:
Reminds me of a joke which propriety forbids me to repeat in whole but whose punch line is "That SOB. He told me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for years."
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The set up line involved "key to heaven" and yes, that's a great joke! I heard it as "Gabriel's Trumpet" but like this version just as well.

By the way, I thought when I first glanced at this thread that it would be about religious sailors ... then realized it was missing the "a."

DR
 
See what silly superstitious belief in woo can bring down upon you?

I'm afraid my sympathy levels are minimal on this one.
 
"Are you ready to receive the blood and the flesh and the splooge of the Christ?"

The religious approach wouldn't fly too well over here, but in the grand tradition of woo I'm sure you could convince some cougars that your semen is the ultimate rejuvenating facial scrub with some pseudoscience language. Just say that your sperm can impregnate their pores with a youthful glow due to a high protein diet. There are plenty of desperate Mary Kay customers who wouldn't find that hard to swallow.

I'm going to hell for that.
 
Robo Sapien said:
"Are you ready to receive the blood and the flesh and the splooge of the Christ?"

The religious approach wouldn't fly too well over here, but in the grand tradition of woo I'm sure you could convince some cougars that your semen is the ultimate rejuvenating facial scrub with some pseudoscience language. Just say that your sperm can impregnate their pores with a youthful glow due to a high protein diet. There are plenty of desperate Mary Kay customers who wouldn't find that hard to swallow.

I'm going to hell for that.
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If they swallow it, they can't use it as beauty cream.

(You might want to goggle up a song by John Valby called "Yank my Doodle" while you are pursuing this line of thought ... )
 
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