This just in:
Scientists around the world are busy assessing the latest discovery by Israel's leading fabulist, Doron Shadmi. Today, Doron announced a new form of energy, previously undetected by others. This announcement, according to Doron, is a result of his studies of what he terms direct perception, an investigative technique heretofore unknown to the western world.
Today's announcement is a follow-on to Doron's report from last year, his discovery of a previously unknown disease. Its complete lack of symptoms of any kind have frustrated all attempts by the medical community to find a cure for the disease. Meanwhile, unconfirmed reports indicate the disease may be reaching pandemic levels. Needless to say, the general public is unconcerned.
Currently, Doron Shadmi is the only known qualified practitioner of direct perception. Some forty years ago, a small group of British researchers, disguised as rock musicians, traveled to India to learn the cult practice of direct perception, but, to date, the surviving members of the group have been unable to adapt the method to scientific study. It was believed Doron's ally and chief supporter, Moshe Klein, had some skill with the technique, but recent revelations suggest otherwise. Moshe thought he had observed this new energy form announced today by Doron. Unfortunately, what he thought he thought was just that, a thought.
In light of these developments regarding Moshe, Lego has tabled all negotiations with him. Lego had hoped to expand its existing "+ Power Functions" product line with materials focusing on the new power source. An unnamed spokesman for Lego stated that Moshe's thought he thought he thought has cast doubt that Moshe can deliver a working prototype.
Some scientists have expressed concerns about their inability to detect Doron's new energy form. Doron responded quickly and with frequent, extensive rewrites that scientists by their very nature would be unable to detect the energy.
Meanwhile, homeopaths have applauded Doron's latest announcement. They view Doron's results and investigation techniques as confirmation of the effectiveness of homeopathy. They also recognize him as the leading authority for making something out of nothing.