December Stundie Finals (the last ones of 2012)

[Travis]

Ha, not even the busy start of the new year could keep the last Stundie Finals of 2012 from coming to a poll near you!

But what was the winner of November?

Well it was this nice little exchange were some non-math was done.

in no time in the history of the universe has the moon provided two full moons in one month.

the Moon phases repeat every 29 days. Most months are 30 or 31 days. You do the math.

Btw 31-29=15???? Damn your math is bad.

And now the 28th Annual Stundie's of December Finalists
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~~1~~
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Somewhere in this world exists someone that has never encountered anyone that knows anything about friction, inertia or conservation of momentum. The big question is whether we should radio tag them for further study or make contact?

Exactly. If the Earth is spinning beneath us, why can't I just hover in a helicopter, wait until my destination reaches me, and then land when it comes? Most people answer (though they can't explain how) that this is because the Earth's atmosphere supposedly rotates precisely along with the Earth.

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~~2~~
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I suspect this person is from Belize. We all know how Belizeans hate New Zealand and are unaware that people can do research (I only presume this because, as I am of Belgian-Danish extract, I can only read information when presented in beer labels—which made being a Mormon hard).

Why does a Kiwi know so much about air traffic management over the USA?
You're not really from New Zealand,are you?

Well it does seem a rather odd thing that a kiwi would care so much about an American 'terrorist' attack. Since it's well known that kiwi's aren't terribly fond of Americans (cousins though we may be)....

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~~3~~
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FACT: Declaring the word "fact" at the beginning of anything written automatically makes your following words smell of donkey douche...that's a smell isn't it?

Fact: The Copernican Revolution torpedoed Bible credibility and paved the way for the Darwinian Revolution over 300 years later. Fact: The success of Copernicanism established theory over observation in the sciences of mathematics and astronomy. Fact: That success paved the way for establishing theory over observation in the bio-chemical sciences through Darwinism. Both of these factless theories torpedoed the Bible's credibility, BUT, only by attacking the Copernican foundation of Space Science's Big Bang Evolutionary Paradigm can the evolution myth be revealed and destroyed.

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~~4~~
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Well them slutty tautologies, on the other hand, are always getting knocked up by some irrationally chaotic Pleonasm. That's why abstinence only rhetorical construction should be mandatory.

Virgins don't get pregnant. Ever.

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~~5~~
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Well of course you believe this. How could you not with your gullible A positive blood type?

Most skeptics, being too left brained to understand the nature of symbolic language, dismiss astrology offhand, on the basis of one fact,without any analytic study of their own. A study of the science or art of astrology, will show that it works through personal experience, eastern or western, albeit on different levels.

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~~6~~
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I have a hypothesis that if this person could actually do this they would already have millions of dollars.

The problem with science is that it's based on "theory", I could have a hypothesis of lets say... "do birds chirp at night??" And get a government grant for 100,000 to follow up this stupid study

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~~7~~
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Well I'm not sure why he resected the liver through the pancreas but it does deliver more emotional impact. Is his weltanschauung always expressed in abdominal deconstructionism?

Is Astrology scientific? The simple answer is yes—and no. Astrology, like medicine, is an art based on a science.

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~~8~~
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Well this person just has the answers. Why I bet they would also solve my money problems by letting me know I need more money.

The rated speed is 100,000 MPH. One light year is 5,879,000,000,000
So do the math. It is roughly 6711 years. Because it is solar powered it can travel large distances. They might have to be launched closer to the destination if you are in a hurry.

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~~9~~
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i didn't say anything racist. i just pointed out that the mestizos people of belize generally have no idea about how to learn anything and hate kiwis. i never once said anything really badly racist.

i didn't use foul language. let me say this one more time for you, because apparentlyou aren't getting what i mean here. i asked amazon to delete yours and all ur other hateful friends' posts, not mine!!!!!!! do you understand now????? i hope so, because i won't be repeating that again to you. the only cuss word i used was *********, that's it. i dont really call that foul language. i never once used the other really bad words, like the f word.

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~~10~~
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ALSO HOW DARE THEY LABEL ME AS HISTRIONIC! THAT IS JUST A LABEL TO DISTRACT FROM THE FACT THAT I AM SUPER IMPORTANT.

I have been in the truth movement long enough to have learnt this:

If you can't decide if a story is true or not, check out the reaction it gets.

That some guys should come up with 'clever' terms that are supposed to make something unusual look normal is a good indicator that there's a disinformation campaign going on.

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~~11~~
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Crap. So all my chest hair means I should actually be voting for Republicans? How did I get that wrong?

I suspect that one major reason why liberals balk at the idea of complementarianism is that they are more biologically androgynous. They are simply not as complementary as we are, by their very nature. The mental and physical difference between the sexes is simply greater, at the conservative end of the spectrum.

That is why, when conservatives say things that other conservatives take for granted, like, “Women should be protected,” liberals act like we’re from a different planet. That sort of protective instinct in males is related to territorialism (testosterone levels), and the urge to be protected is related to timidity in women (estrogen levels), so they very well may have absolutely no idea why we feel that way. They can’t relate at all. And they chalk it up to us just being a throwback to the 1950s… when there was more physiological differences between the sexes.

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~~12~~
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I sincerely hope this is from a thread titled "I'm Pretty Sure My Arrogant Tendencies Make Me Awesome."

I just checked. There are 387 replies to this thread and 7,129 views. Translated. There are more people reading than are posting. So even if you take away all the members disagreeing with my comments all 387. It still suggest there are an extremely large number of readers who agree and are reading my posts. Not bad for a week old OP.

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~~13~~
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This sounds like a pretty crappy invasion plan. I mean why turn them into frigid lesbians? Wouldn't it be easier to just make them frigid? Why also make them lesbians? Streamline those plans aliens.

Western men (and women) should be very angry at Illuminati Jewish bankers and their Masonic lackeys. Like alien invaders, they abducted our women, brainwashing them to become lesbian and frigid.

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~~14~~
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Confoundicious says that something is part of everything.
So to know something is to know everything.
Except what Confoundicious has in his pocket.

Is Proof is Impossible to Prove until Proof of All Proof's have been Proven.

In order to prove anything don't you need to know everything?
and if you don't know everything, how can you know anything?
and if you don't know anything, do you know nothing?

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~~15~~
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In this science lab we ban numbers. All results will be reported as being many indiscernible parts of something intangible. We expect to never learn anything.

No.
Don't put your faith in numbers. They can lead you to nonsense like alternate universes. Put your faith in scientific evidence.

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~~16~~
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Statistics declare that number to be divisible by zero.

At some point even the most stubborn disbeliever will have to shake their head and say, there's only so many coincidences that can continue to pop up and statistically still be considered a coincidence.

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~~17~~
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Traveling half way around the planet to Kenya while pregnant, for no discernible reason, is so crazy. But traveling to the neighboring country of Tanzania makes perfect sense.

The basic assumption in this contraversy has been the Dunham traveled to Kenya directly by air. However, this has never been proven or disproven. If Dunham had gone to Kenya, she could have gone by many other conveyances, by boat, by train, by car. We also can’t rule out that Dunham could have gone to another country next to Kenya and traveled their by car.

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~~18~~
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Dude I think the Vizier was just mysteriously killed by some guy on hashish/opium/beer. Apparently our security really sucks and I am a total square.

The word assassin comes from the Arabic word “Hashish”, name for a drug, I believe correct translation is opium.

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~~19~~
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And their plane was named the Spruce Goose. Made from the wood of a tree Lincoln himself chopped down it was. I obtain all my knowledge by splicing together trivia from discarded sugar packets.

...Within forty years of the Wright Brothers flight across the Atlantic Ocean in 1903, thousands of other people had done the same.

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~~20~~
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Would it be cruel to expose this person to some David Cronenberg films?

Whats with the Masonic checkered floor pattern in almost every video? The "All Seeing eye" at the pinnacle of the pyramid (mountain)? Why triangles/pyramids in the video screen behind her 'throne'?  And why is there always a man dressed as a woman (men dancing in bras, here) in every video? Symbols have meaning. We need to learn what they mean, and what is their intended purpose.

 

[Myron Proudfoot]

thanks again Travis. I had to vote for #19. As a Dayton native I have a soft spot for the Wright Brothers...

 

[thedopefishlives]

I think the overall field this month was decent, but that some of the front-runners are of truly mind-boggling quality.

 

[Border Reiver]

Number 12 - which reminds me so much of the beloved Gen. Melchett, "If nothing else, a pig-headed refusal to look facts in the face will see us through."

 

[Travis]

I liked being able to use the phrase "slutty tautologies."

 

[kookbreaker]

I voted #1 and #19. Such arrogant ignorance.

 

[thedopefishlives]

I voted #1 and #19. Such arrogant ignorance.

#1 gets me every time because we had a whole thread here about it that was full of laughter and much mocking. When the nomination came, the thread got linked, and I went and started reading it. The sheer stupidity nearly made my head asplode.

 

[pakeha]

I liked the slutty tautologies, myself.
But let's face it, #2 took the biscuit.

 

[W.D.Clinger]

#1 seems worthy, but it would sound quite reasonable to those who dwell where prevailing winds are supersonic.

#3 would get my vote, but who doesn't lament the dominance of theory over observation in the science of mathematics?

#15 is phrased so beautifully that I looked up and read his entire post, admiring the way its structure led inexorably to that final punch line, which he didn't get.

But #15 goes far to explain #1 and #3, so it gets my vote.

 

[Denver]

When I first glanced over these, I thought 20 was maybe too many options, and could have been skimmed down to maybe a dozen. Then later when I went to actually read them thoroughly to vote, I can see how that might be difficult.

I voter for 5,6,12,14,15. While I don't think 12 was my favorite (Everyone not with me is with me), I think I will use that excuse myself in many upcoming arguments.

 

[sts60]

#1 because, well, friction.

#19 because Heiwa is so spectacularly clueless and so full of himself.

I'd have voted for #8, but too much trollishness.

 

[Erock]

#1 because, well, friction.

#19 because Heiwa is so spectacularly clueless and so full of himself.

I'd have voted for #8, but too much trollishness.

#19 isn't Heiwa

 

[SomedayGirl]

I went with #19, although it was a tough call between that and #11.

 

[jaydeehess]

8 ,10, 11,19 with 8 and 19 being my favourites

I mean really, I would love to know how to cut down on travel time by just starting where I want to go in the first place. One learns something new everday, when 19 fisrt appeared I learned that the Wrights made it accross the ocean. I'll bet they managed it because everyone else was starting from too far away.

 

[matt.tansy]

I went with #19, although it was a tough call between that and #11.

You can vote for up to 20 of em.

 

[HotRodDeluxe]

I voted for number 10. I have to put up with that BS on other sites, hence my avatar.

 

[The Palmernator]

I voted for #1, but when I read the entire thread it made me eat my own desk in frustration...

 

[sts60]

#19 isn't Heiwa

Oops, yes, that was Faceman, who went one-and-done on apollohoax. But his mantle was picked up by Eternidad195, who's earned a January nomination of her own out of recycled Jack White scraps.

 

[brazenlilraisin]

3, 4, 12, 17, 19.

 

[Belz...]

1 is cool but 11 gets my vote. It's so... insane.