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Debunking Noah, and I need some help

His authority seems just as valid as yours but you don't need an appeal to authority to see that god drowning everyone in a moment of pique and saving all animals and some people on a boat is false.


So true... :thumbsup:

It is like those theologians who keep saying Dawkins is not qualified to critique religion because he did not have his brain lobotomized by theology schools.

In a way they are right...had he studied theology he probably would have lost the ability to think and thus would not be able to see the lack of any merit in the twaddle they dish out.
 
So true... :thumbsup:

It is like those theologians who keep saying Dawkins is not qualified to critique religion because he did not have his brain lobotomized by theology schools.

In a way they are right...had he studied theology he probably would have lost the ability to think and thus would not be able to see the lack of any merit in the twaddle they dish out.

In order to get to theology you first have to convince yourself that there's a theo to be logyed about.

There seems to be a real blind spot about that among his critics and apologists in general.
 
I love this question, mostly because I've been exploring the number 40 (among others) in Biblical (and post-Biblical) Jewish sources. The Tanakh (and Talmud, following its lead) use numbers as shorthand for conveying more complex ideas.

The number 40 is used in contexts of starting over, of new opportunities (or the consequences of missing them): the flood, the number of years in the wilderness, the reigns of David and Solomon, the tranquil periods in the book of Judges, to name but a few (it might even be a specific reference to the 40 weeks of (typical) human gestation). It carries over in Jewish law, too: the minimum volume for a valid mikveh (ritual bath) is 40 se'ah; immersion in a mikveh "resets" a person or object's ritual status for certain purposes.

The significance of the number doesn't really make or break the literal interpretation, but it does strengthen the contention that the Biblical flood story is intended as a symbolic narrative.

That's rather what I thought, as a girl, when this was first explained to me.

I always had lots of doubts about the bible and christianity, but I was indoctrinated to think that doubt came from the devil, to lead me away from god. (It eventually worked. ;:) So as a child, I didn't think about it very hard, because that would have been a sin. Poor little kids, and what we do to so many of them...sigh.

Anyway, once I'd heard it, I kept noticing references to "40" all over the bible, and it did make more sense to think of it as a way to say "a really long time, okay?" and kind of lent that same "it's just a story; it didn't really happen" flavor to each instance in which I found it.

Thank you for the answer, Rabbi! It was quite instructive. :)
 
The significance of the number doesn't really make or break the literal interpretation, but it does strengthen the contention that the Biblical flood story is intended as a symbolic narrative.

What would the theme of such a narrative be? I mean in the tradition. What is supposed to be gleaned?
 
Well, the answer to that is pretty simple: God simply changed the laws of chemistry. After all, He did change the laws of physics. Remember how before the flood there were no rainbows, but then afterwards there were? That means the refraction of light did not happen before the flood but did start happening afterwards. So God made a change to the laws of physics. If He can do that, then changing the laws of chemistry to eliminate salinity issues ought to be no problem at all.
(sigh) You're right, of course.

But given that we were tasked with providing refutation of the Noah story, we'd get that same argument about anything we say against it, right? There will always be the "but god made it work somehow" argument. If someone is going to believe the silly story, they're going to believe it no matter what. We can only provide as many points of contention against it as possible (and there are a lot) and hope that occasionally someone will "see the light." It does happen. It took a few of these kinds of "hmmm...that doesn't make sense now that you put it that way" moments for me to realize it was all hooey. And my son, too, came back from the brink pretty much the same way.
 
given that we were tasked with providing refutation of the Noah story, we'd get that same argument about anything we say against it, right? There will always be the "but god made it work somehow" argument.
If you use arguments comparing what's in the story to observable reality outside the religion, yes. But you won't have that same problem if you stick to dealing with the story's own inconsistencies with itself or with other parts of the Bible or with other beliefs in the religion. For example, pretty much every number the story mentions is contradicted somewhere else in the same story. And right before the flood God says he's limiting human life span to a certain length but right after it there's a list including at least eight people born after the flood who lived longer than that. And there's that bit about the sons of the gods reproducing with human women. And the story has animals divided into clean and unclean at the start but says people didn't eat any animals at all until afterward. And the first commandment God gave them after the flood was that if anybody ever does somebody wrong then the wronged party should take revenge, which not only is weirdly disconnected from the story but also contradicts other Bible verses saying not to take revenge. And the whole point of the flood was to rid the world of evil but evil's still here, making it God's biggest failure since all those animals he created trying to come up with a companion for Adam in chapter 2.
 
What would the theme of such a narrative be? I mean in the tradition. What is supposed to be gleaned?

A whole slew of things, and depending on which commentaries one consults, different themes get emphasized. The one that comes to me off the top is this: From Adam and Eve to Cain and Abel to Noah and the flood, one of the major threads is illustrating the concessions to human nature that must be made in making any (lasting) relationship (not just with God) feasible. The reader is made to realize that human nature will give rise to all sorts of unpleasantness, but despite how aggravating, destructive, petty and selfish we can be to one another, the relationships are worth it - thus God's vow not to destroy civilization again, because "man's heart's desire is evil from his youth," not in spite of that.

Another is to contrast Noah's behavior with that of Abraham. Noah was righteous, and did as God commanded, but nothing more; whereas Abraham, when he discovered what was in store for irredeemably selfish, evil Sodom, nevertheless confronted God, seeking to clarify whether in fact destroying the city would serve the ends of justice. Jewish tradition is ambivalent on Noah's level of piety given that perceived lack of effort: "...Noah was a righteous man; he was innocent in his generations..." There are two ways of interpreting that last clause - either that Noah was so righteous as to be considered so in any generation, or that in his generation he was really something, but if compared him to Abraham he was nothing special - specifically because Abraham interceded for the evil people of Sodom. When people bring upon themselves whatever misfortune they deserve, what's our response? And how will we live with that response afterwards?
 
I've always wondered why we needed the flood story at all. Why did God feel the need to destroy upgrade Creation v1.0 to Creation v2.0 if it was going to all go to pot anyway and he'd have to come down as Jesus?
 
A whole slew of things, and depending on which commentaries one consults, different themes get emphasized. The one that comes to me off the top is this: From Adam and Eve to Cain and Abel to Noah and the flood, one of the major threads is illustrating the concessions to human nature that must be made in making any (lasting) relationship (not just with God) feasible. The reader is made to realize that human nature will give rise to all sorts of unpleasantness, but despite how aggravating, destructive, petty and selfish we can be to one another, the relationships are worth it - thus God's vow not to destroy civilization again, because "man's heart's desire is evil from his youth," not in spite of that.

Another is to contrast Noah's behavior with that of Abraham. Noah was righteous, and did as God commanded, but nothing more; whereas Abraham, when he discovered what was in store for irredeemably selfish, evil Sodom, nevertheless confronted God, seeking to clarify whether in fact destroying the city would serve the ends of justice. Jewish tradition is ambivalent on Noah's level of piety given that perceived lack of effort: "...Noah was a righteous man; he was innocent in his generations..." There are two ways of interpreting that last clause - either that Noah was so righteous as to be considered so in any generation, or that in his generation he was really something, but if compared him to Abraham he was nothing special - specifically because Abraham interceded for the evil people of Sodom. When people bring upon themselves whatever misfortune they deserve, what's our response? And how will we live with that response afterwards?

In the end it's all just made up stories, the flood story and your exegesis of the flood story are imaginative inventions of the human mind having no anchor in reality.
 
A whole slew of things, and depending on which commentaries one consults, different themes get emphasized. The one that comes to me off the top is this: From Adam and Eve to Cain and Abel to Noah and the flood, one of the major threads is illustrating the concessions to human nature that must be made in making any (lasting) relationship (not just with God) feasible. The reader is made to realize that human nature will give rise to all sorts of unpleasantness, but despite how aggravating, destructive, petty and selfish we can be to one another, the relationships are worth it - thus God's vow not to destroy civilization again, because "man's heart's desire is evil from his youth," not in spite of that.

I like the author's use of irony here. His protagonist Yaweh, the alleged all-good one, and his dicking with Job and Abraham, his destruction of cities and indeed entire civilizations, it's this guy that could use some instruction in relationship building. Sadly, we are left to assume there is no one in creation up to that task.
 
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In the end it's all just made up stories, the flood story and your exegesis of the flood story are imaginative inventions of the human mind having no anchor in reality.



Here we have a book that you cannot understand what it is saying by just reading it.....rather you need to RELY on exegesis by OTHER people.

So one is forever relegated to never understanding what god wants to tell him by just reading god's words. Instead, we are to wait for some SELF-APPOINTED "expert" to tell us what it means. He too only got it because he read books after books of other self-appointed "experts" telling us what it means and all of them disagreeing with each other and more often than not they are diametrically opposed.

If these experts had any claim to divine inspiration in their "translations" then we might nod....but the proof is in the budding. If they were all divinely inspired why are they all disagreeing? Why is god's word so mercurial and slippery that hundreds of "experts" reading it cannot come to a consensus on what it means? They disagree often violently and with utter disdain to each other.

So it is a meaningless and worthless book and in the end:
A table is a chair if you just think about it the “right” way and a turd is an apple pie if you just accept to redefine your terms to suit.

It is all a metaphor and the metaphor is what some Rabbi defines it despite a thousand other Rabbis defining it in a thousand orthogonal and contrary ways.

It is a dream unless you want it to be true and it is not true unless you prefer it to be so and who knows unless you do and it is all fine unless you oppose me and then it is not.

:boggled::eye-poppi:eek::covereyes
 
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In the end it's all just made up stories, the flood story and your exegesis of the flood story are imaginative inventions of the human mind having no anchor in reality.
It has that in common with a lot of other tales/fables that are intended to teach lessons to children. Where it differs from most is that most of them are pretty direct and clear about exactly what the point is.
 
It has that in common with a lot of other tales/fables that are intended to teach lessons to children. Where it differs from most is that most of them are pretty direct and clear about exactly what the point is.


And no one has massacred and tortured and killed and raped and conquered and committed genocide according to the teachings of these fables.
 
Here we have a book that you cannot understand what it is saying by just reading it.....rather you need to RELY on exegesis by OTHER people.

So one is forever relegated to never understanding what god wants to tell him by just reading god's words. Instead, we are to wait for some SELF-APPOINTED "expert" to tell us what it means. He too only got it because he read books after books of other self-appointed "experts" telling us what it means and all of them disagreeing with each other and more often than not they are diametrically opposed.
[/INDENT]

Kinda what most Judaic people seem to already know, I wonder why Xtians can't wrap their head around it, but then again Xtians are the scientologists of Judaism
 
Here we have a book that you cannot understand what it is saying by just reading it.....rather you need to RELY on exegesis by OTHER people.

So one is forever relegated to never understanding what god wants to tell him by just reading god's words. Instead, we are to wait for some SELF-APPOINTED "expert" to tell us what it means. He too only got it because he read books after books of other self-appointed "experts" telling us what it means and all of them disagreeing with each other and more often than not they are diametrically opposed.

If these experts had any claim to divine inspiration in their "translations" then we might nod....but the proof is in the budding. If they were all divinely inspired why are they all disagreeing? Why is god's word so mercurial and slippery that hundreds of "experts" reading it cannot come to a consensus on what it means? They disagree often violently and with utter disdain to each other.

So it is a meaningless and worthless book and in the end:
A table is a chair if you just think about it the “right” way and a turd is an apple pie if you just accept to redefine your terms to suit.

It is all a metaphor and the metaphor is what some Rabbi defines it despite a thousand other Rabbis defining it in a thousand orthogonal and contrary ways.

It is a dream unless you want it to be true and it is not true unless you prefer it to be so and who knows unless you do and it is all fine unless you oppose me and then it is not.

:boggled::eye-poppi:eek::covereyes

Yes, since the flood never happened any explanation of the story strikes me as explaining the invisible pink unicorn's preference in food.
 
Actual tried that already.

"Do you think G-d wouldn't protect the inspired word of the Torah from being changed to the point where it loses all meaning?" was her response to that and the fact that it was all an oral tradition before being written down for an abnormally long time.
OK, ask her to demonstrate the truth of her cozy assumption.
 
Another is to contrast Noah's behavior with that of Abraham. Noah was righteous, and did as God commanded, but nothing more; whereas Abraham, when he discovered what was in store for irredeemably selfish, evil Sodom, nevertheless confronted God, seeking to clarify whether in fact destroying the city would serve the ends of justice. Jewish tradition is ambivalent on Noah's level of piety given that perceived lack of effort: "...Noah was a righteous man; he was innocent in his generations..." There are two ways of interpreting that last clause - either that Noah was so righteous as to be considered so in any generation, or that in his generation he was really something, but if compared him to Abraham he was nothing special - specifically because Abraham interceded for the evil people of Sodom. When people bring upon themselves whatever misfortune they deserve, what's our response? And how will we live with that response afterwards?



As bad as Noah may have ever aspired to be he could never ever catch up with Abraham.

  • Abraham married his half sister (Gen 20:12)
  • Abraham LIED about being married to his sister
  • Abraham was a COWARD and did not protect his sister/wife and forced her to lie for him too
  • Abraham PIMPED his sister/wife and sold her off and became exceedingly rich because of it.

Abraham became rich and powerful because he lied about his wife not being his wife and then took money in return for another man having sex with her and never tried to save his wife who also willingly whored herself to enrich her husband. (Gen 12) (see this post)

And they did this TWICE (Gen 20)

Sarah was a slaver who forced her slave girl to be raped by her husband so that she can claim the son of the slave girl as hers (Gen 16:1). She was so heartless so as to force her husband to throw the woman and her child into the wilderness when she had her own biological son instead of the adopted son of a raped slave girl (Gen 21:10).


So Rabbi.... this also must have not actually happened either...right?

So what spiritual gleaning can we exude out of this lovely story of God aiding and abetting PIMPS, LIARS, WHORES, CRUELTY and SLAVERY????

Please tell us oh exalted Rabbi.... what pearls of wisdom can we extract from among all the turd in the story that purports to be history but isn't unless we want it to be sometimes.

How can we dilute the crap in this history (that is not) and story that did not happen (but did) so as to make it a more palatable a soporific?
 
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A whole slew of things, and depending on which commentaries one consults, different themes get emphasized. The one that comes to me off the top is this: From Adam and Eve to Cain and Abel to Noah and the flood, one of the major threads is illustrating the concessions to human nature that must be made in making any (lasting) relationship (not just with God) feasible. The reader is made to realize that human nature will give rise to all sorts of unpleasantness, but despite how aggravating, destructive, petty and selfish we can be to one another, the relationships are worth it - thus God's vow not to destroy civilization again, because "man's heart's desire is evil from his youth," not in spite of that.

Another is to contrast Noah's behavior with that of Abraham. Noah was righteous, and did as God commanded, but nothing more; whereas Abraham, when he discovered what was in store for irredeemably selfish, evil Sodom, nevertheless confronted God, seeking to clarify whether in fact destroying the city would serve the ends of justice. Jewish tradition is ambivalent on Noah's level of piety given that perceived lack of effort: "...Noah was a righteous man; he was innocent in his generations..." There are two ways of interpreting that last clause - either that Noah was so righteous as to be considered so in any generation, or that in his generation he was really something, but if compared him to Abraham he was nothing special - specifically because Abraham interceded for the evil people of Sodom. When people bring upon themselves whatever misfortune they deserve, what's our response? And how will we live with that response afterwards?

Where does the god in this fairy story get off commanding anyone? When did he submit to the judgment of the people he intended to governed and secure their mandate? Why would anyone feel an obligation to obey this god fella's direction?
 

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