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Dealing with family.

GeeMack said:
"No, Sally, it isn't made up at all. The science is a little complicated, but it is well understood. Science has come a very long way since your grandmother was in school."
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Unless she's really old, "Science has come a very long way since your grandmother skipped school."
 
Monstrmac1 said:
I'm pretty sure Grandma vs Monstrmac1 is the next SyFy original movie.
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I look forward to it. ;)


Monstrmac1 said:
I live in Virginia. My cousin's position is in accordance with her fiance's. Meaning that unless there is an immediate obvious threat to the child, the law would have no interest in the case.

Medically, this may be the right choice for the girl. However it wasn't a decision made on medical advice.

Also, I have no interest in changing the minds of the adults in my family, except for maybe my brother, but that's for a different post. I just hate to see kids kept from the glorious truths about the world they inhabit.
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The state of Virginia gives a bit of leeway for religious beliefs about the medical care of the child. However, even such a law has its limits. You can't starve your kid, for example, and claim 'god' told you to do it.

Virginia - Child Abuse and Neglect You have to click on Virginia and definitions of child abuse and neglect.

Exceptions
Citation: Ann. Code § 63.2-100

No child who in good faith is under treatment solely by spiritual means through prayer, in accordance with the tenets and practices of a recognized church or religious denomination, shall for that reason alone be considered to be an abused or neglected child. Further, a decision by parents who have legal authority for the child, or in the absence of parents with legal authority for the child, any person with legal authority for the child, who refuses a particular medical treatment for a child with a life-threatening condition shall not be deemed a refusal to provide necessary care if:
The decision is made jointly by the parents or other person with legal authority and the child.
The child has reached age 14 and is sufficiently mature to have an informed opinion on the subject of his or her medical treatment.
The parents or other person with legal authority and the child have considered alternative treatment options.
The parents, or other person with legal authority, and the child believe in good faith that such decision is in the child's best interests.
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(my bold)

If the child suffers damage from the withheld medications it might be prosecutable. That's sad. The kid has to be injured before the court will step in.
 
Thanks for the info Ginger. I live in southwest Virginia, in the Appalachians, believe me a place like this needs much stronger laws to keep kids from being harmed by woo.

The good news is that my cousin, despite being religious, is very intelligent. I think she would reach a comprising point if her daughter were suffering. Hopefully they are right and she will not need the medication again. But it would have been better to come to that decision rationally and practically.
 
It's the child's grandmother. If you were both her grandchildren, I'd see some room to maneuver. But here, there is none. Just hope that she finds you sufficiently cool to want to talk to at future reunions.
 
That is a tough call as she does not sound like your daughter. By the way, does this Grandma believe in the intelligence design "speculation"?
 
I can't speak to the woo, but I will say, if the child is epileptic, abruptly stopping her meds is not the way to go about it. WEANING her off of them (i.e. taking gradually smaller doses under the supervision of a doctor) is certainly a workable solution, and is one you may want to suggest to her mother rather than simply stopping her meds altogether.

My sister has been epileptic her whole life, but for over ten years was able to be completely medication free after being slowly weaned off of her meds at a younger age. Granted, she started having some again when she got to college, but her doctors generally agree that it was due to the stress. She is back on a low dose of medicine, last I recall, but may be trying to get herself off of it again. Regardless, in a situation like that, simply stopping the meds is absolutely not the correct response. They need to speak to her doctor about beginning to wean her off the medication rather than making their own decisions about it because "the Lord told them so". I mean, I believe in God myself, but I have a hard time believing that God would want a child to suffer merely because some idiot hallucinated that God was speaking to them.
 
GeeMack said:
"No, Sally, it isn't made up at all. The science is a little complicated, but it is well understood. Science has come a very long way since your grandmother was in school."
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Good. Another good one is:

"Some people do make up stories to explain things they don't understand. A smart young lady like you can think about things and make up your own mind about this and a lot more."
 
Monstrmac1 said:
Interesting thoughts.

Here's something much worse. The same girl has suffered from seizures. She's been on medication to control them for years. Recently, the man who is about to become her stepfather decided she should no longer be on the medicine. He said that he prayed and the lord told him she would no longer need them.

I have told my family, if the girl is seriously hurt by a seizure I will physically harm this man.
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About the evolution thing:
I think most people here gave you some good tools to work with. Like they said, just have patience with it, don't expect the girl to agree with you right away. If you try to make your point too vigorously, it might upset (some of) your family members, taking away from the discussion. Just try to make her curious, she might even come to you with questions about evolution or science in general.

About the seizures:
I don't know how serious/dangerous her seizures are, but does her doctor at least know she stopped taking medication for that? I assume so, but if he/she doesn't, or if you're not sure of it, you might want to talk to her mother just to be sure.
I think the priority in this case would be to see if her doctor knows about it and checks up on her as much as is necessary when stopping with this medication.
If you do this and her mother or stepfather (or anyone else) doesn't like that you are asking about this (I don't know if they would mind, but if), tell them that you're asking because you care about the girl, not because you want to challenge their beliefs.

I wish you good luck (which I know doesn't help directly, but as a gesture might give you some confidence or motivation if needed).
 
"Some people do make up stories to explain things they don't understand. A smart young lady like you can think about things and make up your own mind about this and a lot more."
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Ok, that one sounds a bit creepy.
 
godless dave said:
That falls under "stupid".
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It could, but I don't think it has to.

Smart & educated people can also be fooled by slick con men, righteous frauds or even the sincerely self-deluded.

I don't know of a single person that displays 100% correct judgement.

Except Randi, of course. :)
 
To me the worst thing about religious woo forced on kids is the potential death of curiosity.
 
Sometimes it's perfectly fine to question the elders. My grandma used to give out advice of the form "They say...". Finally I asked her, "Who's they?". Just don't argue with her about the rules of Scrabble. :)
 
Hecubas said:
Sometimes it's perfectly fine to question the elders. My grandma used to give out advice of the form "They say...". Finally I asked her, "Who's they?". Just don't argue with her about the rules of Scrabble. :)
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You know..........

*whispers*

them!
 
Hecubas said:
Sometimes it's perfectly fine to question the elders. My grandma used to give out advice of the form "They say...". Finally I asked her, "Who's they?". Just don't argue with her about the rules of Scrabble. :)
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Heh, sounds like my grandmother. Sweet as could be but you did not want to screw with her Scrabble game. Nor Spite and Malice, for that matter.

When I was about 16 she came to visit us over the summer, and we all went to the zoo one day. We were in the primate house and one of them (I think it was Willie B the gorilla, for those of you who know Atlanta) put his hand up to the glass. I was wondering at how beautifully it mirrored the human hand and said something about how anyone could look at that and not see evolution at work. I don't remember what she said or if she just gave me The Look, but I knew enough to let it drop.
 
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