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Merged Chick Tracts

I have seen the light! The rest of you Godless heathens can burn! Not me though.
I don't want that child murderin' God I mean really nice God to tornado my house.

I'm so full of Gods peace and love after reading that I crapped my pants.
 
So the gist of that tract is "if you don't convert, god will kill your kids and generally be a dick to you until you do"?

Actually that seems right.
 
I thought the panel of the tornado destroying a house with a helpless child in it with the caption "The lord giveth and the lord taketh away, blessed be the name of the lord." was particularly moving...

Somehow I don't think it was moving me in the direction intended by the author though.
 
Ah that god. You need to fear him. Everyone should fear him. If people don't fear him we have to pray that they learn to fear him. Hopefully if they don't their children will die and tornadoes will take everything they have.


Because he loves you.
 
Mudcat said:
Blessed is Google-sama, my faith in you is restored! Googled Jack Chick and got instant result. Didn't know this guy was the moron printing those stupid little... err, I'm not quite sure what to term them to tell you the truth.
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Fundo-porn?
 
EventHorizon said:
You're way off. The moral is it's OK to be an absolutely horrible human being and awful parent who drives their own children to a life of crime and suicide as long as you confess your sins before you die. Duh. ;)
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No to mention bring her kids up in a way that leads to their eternal damnation, given that they died before accepting Jesus.
 
psionl0 said:
Ahh! I see. You think that "honest atheist" and "dishonest christian" are both oxymorons.

I have met examples of both. (Cue Ripley . . . .)
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You have seen examples of a honest atheist? LOL? That was a joke? Right?

Everyone knows that without thy lord god Jesus Christ salvation of the tainted sin stained soul of humanity we as a human race can be nothing more than lying, thieving, dishonest baby flesh eating monsters damned to a hell we well deserve.

Or, so I read.
 
Brattus said:
Everyone knows that without thy lord god Jesus Christ salvation of the tainted sin stained soul of humanity we as a human race can be nothing more than lying, thieving, dishonest baby flesh eating monsters damned to a hell we well deserve.
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I wonder how honest the christian was who told you that.
 
I can't see it. Not found.

ETA: Never mind, I found it anyway.

Damn, that Chick dude sure is insane. I never knew nonbelievers were struck with calamity more than believers. I guess god's an ass.
 
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Belz... said:
I can't see it. Not found.

ETA: Never mind, I found it anyway.

Damn, that Chick dude sure is insane. I never knew nonbelievers were struck with calamity more than believers. I guess god's an ass.
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Oh, nonbelievers ARE smitten more often than true believers.
But since the amount of True Christians (tm) that follow Jack's god must amount to less than 0.00001% of the total human population, its statistically overlooked.
After all, according to Jack Chick, anyone not following his EXCACT line of christianity is a heathen, in league with (or duped by) satan.

I'm not sure what church he belongs to, or even if he belongs to a church or rather follows Chickianity. But I do know that everyone else will burn in hell forever.
 
Brattus said:
You have seen examples of a honest atheist? LOL? That was a joke? Right?

Everyone knows that without thy lord god Jesus Christ salvation of the tainted sin stained soul of humanity we as a human race can be nothing more than lying, thieving, dishonest baby flesh eating monsters damned to a hell we well deserve.
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That's true, but it's God's fault for making babies so juicy and tender.
 
Soooo... God saves the "Mean Momma" from Hell by killing all of her kids.

Yup, standard Jack Chick stupidity.
 
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