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Books you hate

A Farewell to Arms.

Maybe I had too high of expectations, but seeing who wrote it, I expected it to be a testosterone filled tale of Hemingway saying farewell to arms by brutally killing thousands of Germans with them like a 1917 Rambo.

What I got was essentially a chick flick in print form. the protagonist would be a perfect role for Collin Firth, actually.
 
I read the Tarot trilogy, and it was pretty good, albeit a little gratuitously surreal at times.
I thought the first half of the first book was good enough that I went out and bought the rest of the series. I hated the rest of it.
 
I do not kid. See, she was molested by either her father or older brother (I would honestly rather eat hot gravel than get the book out and check), so -- we're told -- the only was of expressing love she knew was the sexual. So when she met a man that she loved, she seduced (!) him. The tragedy was that she mentioned their love affair to her mother, who (stupid woman) failed to realize that her five-year-old daughter was in a CONSENSUAL sexual relationship, freaked out and called the cops. The lover was promptly imprisoned as a child molestor, and just as promptly beaten to death by his fellow prisoners.

This is the heroine's Great Tragedy. Not just because of her lover's death, not just because she feels responsible, but because If Only Things Had Gone Differently, the two (it's at least strongly implied) would have remained lovers and happily spent their lives together. Because that's how sexual relationships between adults and small children always turn out. Honestly, Anthony is here serving (although not necessarily advertently) as a mouthpiece for NAMBLA's cover story: "What a horrible society we live in, that hates children so! Why do you hate the idea of children feeling pleasure? Are you really so offended by the thought of a grownup just making a child happy?"

Oh, and let me not forget the Anthony Afterword, in which he states -- does not imply, does not suggest, but states as fact -- that a relationship with a "funny uncle" who wants to play "games" that involve "tickling in funny places", and who insists that the "game" be kept strictly secret, is less hurtful and traumatizing to a child than an injection at the doctor's office.

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. :( :eye-poppi
 
Anything written by Phillip José Farmer or Orson Scott Card.

I got three books into the Riverworld series and I'm not sure if I can make myself finish the thing. Fortunately for me I've been listening to them in audio format while working so I don't have to put forth any real effort to read them.

I still think that it's an interesting idea, and it started off well. Unfortunately Farmer seems to be way too interested in aspects of the story that I didn't care about and ignores others that I'd like to have heard more about. Anyway, yeah, I can see where you're coming from there.
 
Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand.

What a god-awful piece of tripe.

I never read that book. I remember reading Rand's book "Anthem" in high school on the recommendation of my guitar teacher. It was so bad I can't even remember what it was about now. I think my brain deliberately forgot it.
 
I personally never liked anything Charles Dickens ever wrote, and I could never figure out why on earth they made us read the stuff for English classes in school.

I also never really liked Tolkein either. Most people tell me that I should have read something other than the Simarillion before making any judgments about his work, but after reading 2/3 of that thing I just don't think I could bring myself to do it. I saw the movies, that was enough.
 
Foucault's Pendulum is great, the da Vinci code is a lightweight attempt at what it was satirising.

Mystical dimensions in a phone box?

I also liked Neal Stevenson's Quicksilver, but I had to spped-read it, and preferred Cryptonomicon.

Piers Anthony, however, yup that's creepy.

"Crash" by JG Ballard; I managed 30 pages, at a time when I prided myself on finishing any book that I started....
 
A Farewell to Arms.

Maybe I had too high of expectations, but seeing who wrote it, I expected it to be a testosterone filled tale of Hemingway saying farewell to arms by brutally killing thousands of Germans with them like a 1917 Rambo.

What I got was essentially a chick flick in print form. the protagonist would be a perfect role for Collin Firth, actually.

Noooo!.

I suppose you didn't like "For Whom The Bell Tolls", either?

That is one of the most moving books I have read.
 
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Any book you have been forced to read has a great risk of ending up on your hate list. I Can't STAND Steinbeck :) At high scool we had a teacher in "Ancient times knowledge" -directly translated don't know what it's called in english, it was cumpolsory and basically it was about analyzing the writings of Homér. I had read those books as a kid, off course translated in modern language, and i liked the good stories about the heroes, battles etc. but this particular teacher nearly destroyed those books for me becaused he analyzed them to death, if you know what i mean. We spent the first two months analyzing the first TWO LINES of the Illiad.......

Fortunately he didn't succeed. :)

I still like To Kill a Mocking Bird", which was the probably most optimistic least pessimistic book we were made to read at school, (in equal position with "Farenheit 451", as at least the 5th atomic war was a new start, and obviously people had survived the previous four...).
 
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Okay--another vote of confidence here for Catcher! And I enjoy the Iliad and the Odyssey.
Now for ones I don't like:
DaVinci Code--because really, if I could figure out the clues, how much of a secret could it be? Can't the characters be smarter than me?

Yes, I suspected it was to make stupid people feel clever.

You might like Cryptonomicon, by Neal Stephenson. I certainly didn't feel cleverer than the protagonists in that, but I think that I did learn a lot about cryprography.

It did make sense in the end, but the first 600-odd pages were a journey where I had no idea where the plot(s) was/were going.
 
Echoing some of the opinions above...

Da Vinci Code - 'nuff said.

CS Lewis's Interplanetary Trilogy - Like being hit in the face with a copy of the Bible wrapped in the script from a 1960's Dr. Who episode. Repeatedly. Contemptible.

Cider With Rosie by Laurie Lee. We were made to read this for 'O' Level English. After the first half dozen chapters I refused to read any more because it was utter tripe, to the anger of my teacher. I ended up buying a book of study notes and passing the exam by memorising them instead.

The rather obscure 'A Voyage To Arcturus' by David Lindsay. Supposedly a favourite of C.S. Lewis and Tolkien - 250 pages of annoyingly dull travelogue on an alien planet imagined by someone with a 3 year-old's gift for imaginative SciFi. From This page...

In his introduction to The Mind Parasites, Colin Wilson refers to David Lindsay’s 1920 SF novel, A Voyage to Arcturus as “the greatest novel of the 20th century.” Such a statement coming from a writer of well over 100 books, including well-regarded books on philosophy and science fiction, makes one sit up and take notice.

[...]

Maskull is Everyman, and you soon identify with him. Bored with an ordinary life, he accepts an invitation to see the planet Tormance. His host is a small, ugly and cynical man named Krag. Left alone on Tormance, Maskull encounters various races, most of who worship a god named Crystalman and regard Krag as the devil. If figuring out the truth weren’t challenging enough, Maskull inexplicably sprouts new limbs or organs, so as to blend in with the locals, and finds that those organs affect his thought patterns and his perception of reality. His confusion is all too reminiscent of life in a human body on planet Earth.

Like us, Maskull wants to know what’s going on. He follows a set of drumbeats, never seeing the drummer, but suspecting it is a being named Surtur who can reveal the mystery. Many people identify Surtur with Crystalman, a deity who created the world, a good world filled with pleasure and beauty. Others say that Crystalman’s identification with Surtur is Crystalman’s greatest lie.

Maskull meets spiritual people who see the world as entirely good. Rejecting the notion of taking any life, they subsist on water and minerals alone. Their neighbors are people with an eye in the middle of the forehead --- the organ for the will. For those, only the exercise of will makes life worth living. Other people reject both pain and pleasure, view duty as the only worthwhile pursuit. One man, in rejecting pleasure and Crystalman, finds solace in self-torture.

Angry and confused, Maskull kills people who cross his path, often out of revenge or because their beliefs make them appear cruel. He cannot help killing others, in self defense or accidentally. Each victim, upon dying, acquires a mask like grin, called the face of Crystalman. Seeing the suffering and confused people, Maskull soon doubts the universal assumption of Crystalman’s goodness. He realizes that his presence on Tormance is no accident.

“What am I doing on Tormance?” he asks one man who appears wiser than others.

“You came to steal Muspel fire, to give a deeper life to men --- never doubting if your soul could endure that burning.”

“Muspel” is the name for a mysterious world that alone seems real, but which no one has seen. His guide describes Tormance as a copy of Muspel, made by Crystalman.

Maskull’s moment of revelation comes when he is brought to a sublime temple containing statues that represent the ultimate deity. The mysterious light of Muspel shines on the faces and reveals the ugly mask of Crystalman. What people considered to be the most sublime is shown to be a human construct, tainted with human conditioning. Maskull realizes that no one can help him. Everyone is conditioned by a belief system, their specific biology, or their environment.

At the edge of the world Maskull encounters Krag, and realizes he represents everything that Crystalman is not. In a world that worships pleasure, Krag is the devil, not an evil figure but one who seeks to awaken human beings from the sleep in which they unwittingly wallow, to their spiritual destiny.

This synopsis only hints at the true awfulness of A Voyage To Arcturus. If you wish to torture yourself more - the gutenberg e-text is Here
 
The last Wheel of Time book I finished. Robert Jordan was a hack and borderline plagarist, and that is compared to other fantasy authors, who as a general class (with a few notable exceptions *cough*rebbecabradley*cough*) have been picking at Tolkien's corpse for fifty years.

Man I am tired of people trying to act like Tolkien has all the rights to any sort of medieval fantasy book. The wheel of time story isn't even remotely similar to the Lord of the Rings. It's like saying that any space based book is just copying George Lucas. And the whole good vs evil theme with both sides having minions has been around forever. It doesn't belong to Tolkien.

I will say that Robert Jordan uses too much description at times, but the overall storyline of the wheel of time is excellent in my opinion.
 
Just to get back to the OP idea..books you hate. I think hate is a strong term, so would probably reframe it a the moment to "books you'd be concerned if your kid was really getting into."

I'll restate my distatste for horror "Silence of the Lambs" type luridity, and maybe extend it to self-help "If you meet the Buddha in the road" or "mars vs venus" simplistic didactitude. I would be alarmed about Dianetics by Hubbard if it were left on my dining room table by a family member.
 
Man I am tired of people trying to act like Tolkien has all the rights to any sort of medieval fantasy book. The wheel of time story isn't even remotely similar to the Lord of the Rings. It's like saying that any space based book is just copying George Lucas. And the whole good vs evil theme with both sides having minions has been around forever. It doesn't belong to Tolkien.

I will say that Robert Jordan uses too much description at times, but the overall storyline of the wheel of time is excellent in my opinion.

At the risk of derail, it has to be admitted, I think, that until the recent advent of people like China Mieville and Hal Duncan there have been more than a few similarities between books in the genre, all of which seem to stem from Tolkein

The setting is always rural and pre-industrial – usually drawing on a single and rather generalised historical archetype (‘Norse’, ‘Arabic’ ‘Oriental’). They are very often quest-type narratives. If there aren’t explicit elves and dwarves there are usually willowy ‘forest’ types dispensing ethereal wisdom and herbal energy drinks, and sturdy ‘mountain’ types who are all earthy and like a good scrap. They are often profoundly reactionary, politically speaking – some terrible change has happened and we’re trying to get things back to the way they were. Despite having ten thousand year histories, nobody appears to have got very far past mediaeval technology. And so on.
 
At the risk of derail, it has to be admitted, I think, that until the recent advent of people like China Mieville and Hal Duncan there have been more than a few similarities between books in the genre, all of which seem to stem from Tolkein

No, not from Tolkien. Tolkien is simply one of the major players, and generally the most read. Tolkien knew he hadn't invented the genre he wrote in though, and stated as much. Tolkien owes as much to Beowulf, Nordic mythos, and The Worm Orobourus. He stated as much in Letters, especially #199.

The setting is always rural and pre-industrial – usually drawing on a single and rather generalised historical archetype (‘Norse’, ‘Arabic’ ‘Oriental’). They are very often quest-type narratives. If there aren’t explicit elves and dwarves there are usually willowy ‘forest’ types dispensing ethereal wisdom and herbal energy drinks, and sturdy ‘mountain’ types who are all earthy and like a good scrap. They are often profoundly reactionary, politically speaking – some terrible change has happened and we’re trying to get things back to the way they were. Despite having ten thousand year histories, nobody appears to have got very far past mediaeval technology. And so on.

Well, I won't take up the semantic argument against "always", but this is a fair criticism/description of the fantasy genre called "epic" or "high fantasy". There are elements in every genre that are similar, otherwise they wouldn't fit in that genre. If you're writing/reading the epic or high fantasy genre, or its cross-over sword and sorcery genre (the line between these two is so blurred it's hard to distinguish anymore), then yeah, you get a Medieval or Rennaisance society (Tolkien and Jordan are more Rennaisance/Enlightenment than Medieval), with embodied "good" and "evil" and the use of fantastical creatures.

But there's a whole list of seperate fantasy genres that's nearly as long as my leg, which pays little or no homage to Tolkien:

Contemporary fantasy - King Rat by the aforementioned China Mieville, as well as Highlander and even Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Urban fantasy - such as S. Andrew Swann's Kline Maxwell stories, and the early Anita Blake series before Hamilton went over to erotic fantasy (or just plain pornography).
Bangsian fantasy - Riverworld and other alternative/after-life series.
Historic fantasy - Song of Ice and Fire series by Martin.
Wuxia - Chinese martial arts fantasy, such as depicted in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Some samurai fantasy can fit here as well.

Jordan should not be faulted for writing in the epic/high fantasy genre. It's the genre he chose to write in, and the fact that he was able to make a living at it suggested that the audience was big enough, and enjoyed his story well enough (or, like me, were sucked in by the early stuff and now just want to "see how it all ends"), that he was telling a decent story.

I'm currently re-reading The Wheel of Time as a kind of honor to the man's memory. He did manage to keep me entertained and interested, even if I wasn't impressed with some of the later volumes. I'm finding that, in general, he still tells a good story, one that can be re-read from time to time.

And now to return you to your regularly scheduled discussion:

I'm quite done with Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake stories and the companion Meredith Gentry series. Along those lines, apparently in the same genre, the Shiloh Walker The Hunters series.
 
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Just to get back to the OP idea..books you hate. I think hate is a strong term, so would probably reframe it a the moment to "books you'd be concerned if your kid was really getting into."

I like concise titles. "Books you hate" is far more concise and to the point then what you suggested or even "Books that you have many, many negative points about that you wouldn't suggest the books to friends or family or even people that you have a dislike for".
 

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