Moderated Bigfoot- Anybody Seen one?

[Vortigern99]

This thread has taken a turn for the weird.

Bigfoot(s) can't drive cars because, as 9'x6' animals, they can't fit in them. Derrr!

Unless only baby BFs drive and, unlike humans, lose their license after they reach a certain age. Because in BFland, everything works in reverse, kinda like Soviet Russia.

 

[DennyT]

And who is driving the cars that strike all these deer? Are you so human centric that you just ruled out the possibility of bigfoot drivers without thinking about it?

Thousands of cars are stolen every year and many if not most of the perpetrators are never identified. Many thefts occur at night when humans are asleep and Bigfoot is active. Many of the vehicles that are recovered have a very bad odor!! Many vehicles are never recovered not unlike the many planes still missing in the Pacific Northwest. Deer carcasses have broken legs. Bigfoot migrates hundreds of miles to service females but never gets hit crossing roads and is never seen copulating. A vehicle with a back seat solves these problems and many others such as staying warm in the winter, storing food and getting radio notifications of upcoming searches and weather advisories. Not to mention the Garmins, maps, loose change, Frito fragments and fuzzy dice. Human teenagers deny they are involved as does organized crime.
I think the evidence is pretty clear that Bigfoot is stealing cars.

 

[FuriousGeorge]

I'm going to have to agree here. Frito fragments are in season all year. I use them for bait in the back seat of the car and between the cushions of my arm chair. Hence the origination of the term "armchair researcher". Not many know this.

 

[RayG]

Bigfoot(s) can't drive cars because, as 9'x6' animals, they can't fit in them. Derrr!

Says you... my son drew this for my bigfoot website over 10 years ago.

RayG

 

[Vortigern99]

With evidence like that staring (grinning malevolently) at me, how can I possibly maintain my contrary position?

I stand humbly corrected. Clearly, bigfoot rip open car roofs and drive the vehicles around with expressions of deranged glee on their furry faces.

Who knew?

 

[Drewbot]

No single car accidents, involving trees? The Big Hairy is also a better driver than humans.

 

[LuvGodzilla]

Bigfoot practicing driving skills:

 

[AlaskaBushPilot]

Bigfoot is adopting Mafia methods in NC:

What the film crews did document was a find of a deer with an unusual break in its front leg which could point to the hunting methods of Bigfoot.
“We find a lot of deer carcasses,” Greene said. “We think that’s how they get most of their sustenance, and when they catch one, it seems they probably grab them by the front leg and twist and jerk it really hard to get a good, clean break.”
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Oh this is really precious.

Thanks parnassus. That's a hall-of-famer in my book.

Why I hang out here, in fact. Great entertainment.


The other interesting thing about the article is that it is apparently really common for people driving at night to see them, and have such narrow escapes from crashing because of it.

But despite all of these near-hits, nobody crashes and nobody hits one.

 

[Drewbot]

The other interesting thing about the article is that it is apparently really common for people driving at night to see them, and have such narrow escapes from crashing because of it.

But despite all of these near-hits, nobody crashes and nobody hits one.

The ones that almost crash, but don't, those are the ones that say they saw Bigfoot. They are falling asleep at the wheel, and see a Bigfoot, wake up, and narrowly escape a wreck.

The ones that DO crash, they would never say Bigfoot was the cause, no one would believe that. An insurance company isn't going to accept Bigfoot. They are going to say "ASLEEP AT WHEEL" on their report. No, it is much better to say a deer ran in front of the car.

Many single car accidents are caused by sleep hallucinations. Police will arrive on the scene, usually in the early morning, and find someone into a tree, or in a ditch. The person will claim something; "There was a tire in the middle of the road", and upon driving back a few miles, no tire will be found, victim will claim adamantly that the tire was there. Not too many accident victims will claim BIGFOOT was standing in the road. They may be picked up for evaluation in such a case.

 

[AlaskaBushPilot]

Sure, I've had the same thing happen. Sleep deprivation hallucinations.

I thought the same way about the absence of accidents "caused by bigfoot".

There is a huge difference between "I thought I saw a bigfoot" and "I crashed from swerving to miss a bigfoot" in terms of personal responsibility.

I think it is more than being worried about whether other people will believe it. People don't believe in bigfoot enough themselves to risk life, limb, or property over it.

 

[Hitch]

Bigfoot drivers?

http://www.speedwaymotors.com/Barefoot-Gas-Pedal-Cover,1189.html

 

[xblade]

Dear Mr. Greene,
In regards to the 'unusual break in it's front leg', I'd like to offer this;
When I am chasing four legged animals, I often bypass the rear legs, and run farther, and longer, in order to maim the front leg of the quadruped. "Poo" I say, to grabbing the rear leg, that is for pansies.

Sincerely,
Bigfoot
Raleigh, NC

Aww, come on now. Bigfoot might break the front leg because the deer has walked into a bigfoot ambush, and gets attacked from the front. Or maybe bigfoot sets traps that break deer's legs.

 

[Sonny2]

There's a small herd of does that frequents my big yard in the winter and eats the grass. One of my dogs tried chasing one a few days ago and the doe in turn chased the dog, striking with her front hooves, narrowly missing the dog. The dog freaked and ran inside and hasn't chased deer again.

Having said all this, I maintain that deer chase Bigfoot and strike, but the big feller has a hide of steel and thus some unlucky deer end up incapacitated. Sad. It also proves that Bigfoot is vegetarian, as the deer are never eaten.

Prove me wrong.

 

[Drewbot]

Deer Sir,
When ambushing deer, I refuse to go for the front leg. My SOP is to climb a tree, and Jimmy Superfly Snuka that sucker. I then walk away, and leave the carcass, this exasperates Footers to no end.

Sincerely,
Bigfoot
Clare County Michigan

P.S. my cousin Bigfoot, from Tennessee uses the same tactic, except he leaps from the tree with the "People's Elbow".

 

[The Shrike]

Deer Sir,
When ambushing deer, I refuse to go for the front leg. My SOP is to climb a tree, and Jimmy Superfly Snuka that sucker. I then walk away, and leave the carcass, this exasperates Footers to no end.

Props for the Superfly reference. He was crazy, and awesome.

 

[LTC8K6]

I think a deer would have a heart attack if it happened to look up and see a 9X6 2,000 pound attempted flying primate...

 

[DennyT]

Are Bigfoot kids affected by sugar rush? You decide...
"Mike Greene of Salisbury got the group going while waiting on the Animal Planet people, who were very late. Greene told of capturing his thermal imagery of Bigfoot in the Uwharries two years ago. Greene said he had left a Zagnut candy bar on a stump and during the night Bigfoot came and took the candy bar, allowing the camera to catch the image. A recreation of the image is posted on his Website Bushloper.net. Greene also shared some observations about Bigfoot including that they are usually sighted crossing the road and that the juveniles are more active, not as cautious as the adults. Greene also said the creatures were very smart and knew where to draw the line when interacting with people. "
http://www.montgomeryherald.com/articles/2011/02/16/news/top_stories/doc4d5ada1de8b8d308719519.txt

 

[jnelso99]

A recreation of the image is posted on his Website Bushloper.net.

But not the image itself? How much embellishment does the "recreation" have added to it, I wonder.

(I glanced at that site but didn't see anything Zagnutty)

 

[AlaskaBushPilot]

From the link provided by parnassus

On Saturday approximately 200 people gathered at the Eldorado Outpost for a search in the Uwharrie National Forest. Walking through an open field a long line of searchers spread out as if they were doing a drive. A helicopter flew overhead, filming the scene. Camera crews on the ground filmed the searchers and whistles and bullhorns alerted the searchers when to stop. The searchers, found a deer carcass, animal hair on a fence and a Bigfoot print in the ground.

Obviously this was staged for filming as opposed to actually doing a drive, so "as if" doing a game drive was the correct way for the writer to phrase it.

It would guarantee "finding" a planted bigfoot print though, that's for sure.

 

[William Parcher]

From National Wildlife Magazine April/May 1968 article featuring the PGF. Check out the caption. It's a Wallace fake...