Are sexists just sexually frustrated?

[Travis]

I'm a little disturbed by the vibe going in a recent Cracked article.

Specifically that many of the sexist comments are attributed to a lack of sex on the part of the commenter that made them. I mean it's possible that the guys behind those comments are just bitter because they can't get laid but that smears those that can't get laid with a pretty unsavory brush.

As someone that found it enormously difficult to become an adult active in a sexual way I disliked the seeming implication that this breeds a deep well of resentment. I can't speak for every man that gets into his late twenties/early thirties without success in gaining sexual experience. I know that. And I have, in fact, seen some sexually frustrated people online that do seem to have been sucked into the land of being a jerk about it. But that doesn't mean you have to be that way.

What's more is that I'm betting some portion of sexists actually are sufficiently sexually active. Characterizing older virgins as vengeful jerks is not right.



Sorry but I just felt like it needed to be said. And it felt like it would be a waste of time to register to comment on the article in question.

 

[theprestige]

I just found the article to be incoherent.

I'm not sure that I share your feelings about the necessity of objecting to comedic stereotyping. It's not like the world has a shortage of people doing that already.

 

[KingMerv00]

I'm a little disturbed by the vibe going in a recent Cracked article.

Specifically that many of the sexist comments are attributed to a lack of sex on the part of the commenter that made them. I mean it's possible that the guys behind those comments are just bitter because they can't get laid but that smears those that can't get laid with a pretty unsavory brush.

As someone that found it enormously difficult to become an adult active in a sexual way I disliked the seeming implication that this breeds a deep well of resentment. I can't speak for every man that gets into his late twenties/early thirties without success in gaining sexual experience. I know that. And I have, in fact, seen some sexually frustrated people online that do seem to have been sucked into the land of being a jerk about it. But that doesn't mean you have to be that way.

What's more is that I'm betting some portion of sexists actually are sufficiently sexually active. Characterizing older virgins as vengeful jerks is not right.



Sorry but I just felt like it needed to be said. And it felt like it would be a waste of time to register to comment on the article in question.

As much as I hate sexism, I'm opposed to generalizing like that about any group. Are there misogynist, sexually frustrated bloggers out there? Yes (probably NSFW). How representative are they of a larger whole? I don't know.

 

[Andrew Wiggin]

As much as I hate sexism, I'm opposed to generalizing like that about any group. Are there misogynist, sexually frustrated bloggers out there? Yes (probably NSFW). How representative are they of a larger whole? I don't know.

Go on 4chan's /s board and see all the angry teenagers pretending that porn models in the pictures aren't attractive enough to be worth the effort to perform intercourse with. You just know that in reality they'd jump at the opportunity, and not let the lack of anorexia or a few ill-placed tattoos get in the way.

I think it's a pretty decent first approximation, somewhere between Aesop's 'fox in the manger' and 'sour grapes' stories. Basically, this is a fable; it generalizes to make a point, on the assumption that the point is worth making, but breaks down on any individual case. Not every dog would drive cattle away from the manger when they found out that hay wasn't a tasty doggy treat, and not every fox would condemn grapes he couldn't taste as inedibly sour.

 

[KingMerv00]

Go on 4chan's /s board and see all the angry teenagers pretending that porn models in the pictures aren't attractive enough to be worth the effort to perform intercourse with. You just know that in reality they'd jump at the opportunity, and not let the lack of anorexia or a few ill-placed tattoos get in the way.

Jesus Christ, man! Go to 4chan? What did I do to deserve such hatred?

Seriously though, if you go looking in places where sexually frustrated people hang out, you'll find sexually frustrated people. Surprise Surprise.


I've floated around various feminist/anti-feminist websites in the past few months. Naturally, I bumped into my share of misogynist radicals. They come in all flavors:

• Alpha, beta, and omega males lamenting "the game"
• Men looking for foreign women because American women don't want traditional roles
• People missing the good ol' days
• Religious dingbats
• People who want the right to smack their spouse around
• Bitter divorcees who want to tear down marriage, alimony, and child support
• Hypermasculine dudebros who are afraid of feminization

It's all a rich tapestry.

(Please note, I've saw plenty of misandry too. I'm only focusing on misogyny because that's the topic at hand.)

I think it's a pretty decent first approximation, somewhere between Aesop's 'fox in the manger' and 'sour grapes' stories. Basically, this is a fable; it generalizes to make a point, on the assumption that the point is worth making, but breaks down on any individual case. Not every dog would drive cattle away from the manger when they found out that hay wasn't a tasty doggy treat, and not every fox would condemn grapes he couldn't taste as inedibly sour.

Your "first approximation" is just based on gut feeling.

 

[Travis]

I just found the article to be incoherent.

I'm not sure that I share your feelings about the necessity of objecting to comedic stereotyping. It's not like the world has a shortage of people doing that already.

I'll agree it was not a particularly well framed article either.

And is comedic stereotyping all that you found it to be?

As much as I hate sexism, I'm opposed to generalizing like that about any group. Are there misogynist, sexually frustrated bloggers out there? Yes (probably NSFW). How representative are they of a larger whole? I don't know.

Holy crap, I'm scared to click that link.

Is it one of those "men's rights" things? Or is it one of those "women suck because they won't jump me" things?

 

[tyr_13]

Yeah, those sexist feminist lesbian chicks just need to get laid. That's why they're so uppity.

Wait, what were we talking about?

____________________

I hate this, but I'm going to have to spell out that the above was a satire to show how the premise that sexists are just sexually frustrated breaks down. I'm sure some people deal with sexual frustration by crying sour grapes and demonizing the opposite sex. However, as Travis points out, that doesn't mean that being sexually frustrated makes you a sexist.

Damn, I have to hold back so many self-deprecating jokes right now.

 

[Weird Science]

The problem with such "explanations" is that they are utterly unrefutable, and in effect just a way to "explain" something (a) without effort and (b) usually, while making sure one's own behavior is "explained" as pure and normal, or at least as excusable and not one's fault.

It's the same with the "rapists are doing it because of their genes" or "we are unfaithful because of evolution" or "liberals are just haters of God" or similar "explanations".

Sexual frustration in particular being the "explanation" to everything was used, until the psuedoscience of Freudian psychotherapy collapsed in the 1970s, to "explain" everything at all, from depression to schizophrenia to unfaithfulness to people preferring one brand of soft drink to another.

 

[Travis]

I think it was this bit that really got to me:

"Most people don't base their quality of life around how hard it is to get laid, because they actually do get laid, and it isn't that hard to do. Being a straight male is tremendous fun and sexuality's lowest difficulty setting: You know what you want and everyone else in your demographic will praise you for being able to do it. No one else on the spectrum of sexual orientation can say that. If women hate you for cursing about how stupid "bitches" are, it's not because you're the victim of an anti-male conspiracy: It's because you're you."

​

Well first off a lack of sex does adversely effect your quality of life. Is it the most important thing? No. But that doesn't stop people from getting suicidally depressed over it. Wanting to feel that there is someone out there that could be attracted to you is not that unusual is it?

The next thing is the implication that getting laid is easy. Yeah, telling someone that has struggled for two decades to accomplish something that it "isn't that hard to do" is not going to improve their mood.

But the end point is the biggie. The implication that all your problems simply stem from the fact that you call them "stupid bitches" and then throw your hands up in amazement as you get rejected again. I'm sure there are idiots that do that. But not everyone that gets rejected is being turned down specifically because they are a misogynistic moron. Though if they are a misogynistic moron I do hope they are getting what they deserve.

 

[Weird Science]

Well first off a lack of sex does adversely effect your quality of life. Is it the most important thing? No. But that doesn't stop people from getting suicidally depressed over it. Wanting to feel that there is someone out there that could be attracted to you is not that unusual is it?

Sex is like money. When you have it, you hardly think about it; when you don't, you think of nothing else. Goes to show that Kant's statement that happiness is merely release from pain, while not actually true, has a point.

But the end point is the biggie. The implication that all your problems simply stem from the fact that you call them "stupid bitches" and then throw your hands up in amazement as you get rejected again.

I, for one, have never met anybody like that. I don't know anybody who ever told me he met anyone like that. The racist, sexist white male is, I believe, a myth of the same sort of the ball-busting feminist and the rich welfare queen. Extreme cases exists, for sure, but not only are they atypical, nobody in the group which is supposed to "admire" such people treats them with anything but contempt.

 

[Andrew Wiggin]

Your "first approximation" is just based on gut feeling.

Yah. 'X' is based on 'synonym for X'

 

[Travis]

Sex is like money. When you have it, you hardly think about it; when you don't, you think of nothing else. Goes to show that Kant's statement that happiness is merely release from pain, while not actually true, has a point.

I've known some very sexually active people that do think about it an awful lot. But I don't think that was your point.

I, for one, have never met anybody like that. I don't know anybody who ever told me he met anyone like that. The racist, sexist white male is, I believe, a myth of the same sort of the ball-busting feminist and the rich welfare queen. Extreme cases exists, for sure, but not only are they atypical, nobody in the group which is supposed to "admire" such people treats them with anything but contempt.

Well sexist men do exist. I've seen them plenty. And some of them do have a problem getting sex.

My point was that it is possible to be rejected a lot for reasons that have nothing to do with being a sexist jerk (though if you are then that probably is the main reason). Attraction is such a strange thing. Any number of tiny things might turn you off of someone through no fault of them as they might be a perfectly pleasant individual. Just not someone you're attracted to for reasons you can't easily articulate.

 

[KingMerv00]

Holy crap, I'm scared to click that link.

I wouldn't call it scary. It's mostly just depressing. Let me give you some free samples. From the link above:

I am an adult male virgin. Men like myself are at the bottom of society. We’re a de facto “untouchable” caste. People, women in particular, think its all right to kick us around. The feminist controlled government takes our money and gives us nothing in return. It’s questionable that we even get any benefits from society. We definitely aren’t getting benefits equal to what we pay in.

This is why I started this blog. It’s a place for virgin men, near-virgin men, and our supporters to figure out how we should FIGHT BACK. We are human beings and we need to remind others of this fact since they have forgotten.

Another:

I have been asked the question, “What would you do if a woman showed interest in you?” Putting aside how that will probably never happen, I wouldn’t trust her. It would be strange that after being treated like a leper by women for my entire life since puberty, that one woman would suddenly think different. Chances are she’s up to no good.

You want scary? Check out The Spearhead or A Voice for Men. The latter link:

Recently here in the comments section, the subject of jury duty at rape trials has come up. One of our readers commented that he voted “not guilty” while sitting on the jury at a rape trial simply because he could. Another reader called that irresponsible. I imagine at least a 98% of the society would agree with her.

Well, 98% of society has been wrong before

With this important subject in mind, I make the following pledge as an activist, and as an American that believes fully in the rule of law. Should I be called to sit on a jury for a rape trial, I vow publicly to vote not guilty, even in the face of overwhelming evidence that the charges are true.

(Bolding his.)

He then asks his readers to follow his lead. A LOT of them agree. Dude...evil.

Is it one of those "men's rights" things? Or is it one of those "women suck because they won't jump me" things?

Little of both. Mostly bitterness. He also has dislikes conspiracy theories...he's not all bad I guess.

 

[Eric D]

With this important subject in mind, I make the following pledge as an activist, and as an American that believes fully in the rule of law. Should I be called to sit on a jury for a rape trial, I vow publicly to vote not guilty, even in the face of overwhelming evidence that the charges are true.

Man, that sucks on so many levels.

 

[Travis]

I don't even want to know what their logic is for always voting "not guilty." I'm sure it will just anger me further.


Is it possible to get a jury verdict nullified if it turns out one of them is a wacko activist who proclaims a certain verdict irrespective of evidence presented?

 

[psionl0]

Generalizations are seldom true.

 

[Captain Obvious]

Sexual frustration? What's that?

 

[Travis]

Generalizations are seldom true.

Generally.............damnit!

 

[JJM 777]

I quickly browsed through the article (and the other 5 sexy cartoons article linked at the start), and it turns out that in this person´s vocabulary "sexism" means "sexualisation". It would help if he used the same vocabulary as the rest of English-speaking world.


"Sexism" means "genderisation", something like "women should not work outside of home / become priests / have a right to vote".


So this guy has something against sexualisation of women. A lost cause to begin with. Sexy women are so sexy that men don´t want to resist them. Two comic books on the shelf, if the sexier of them sells better, then sexy books is what the publishers will start producing. Two teen movies released, if one of them shows topless girls and the bushradio makes it a huge box office success, and the other movie shows nothing and its tickets sell worse, then showing a few topless girls here and there becomes the norm in Hollywood teenager movies.


I wish that this person can get a safe neighbourhood where to live happy, maybe a monastery or a quiet internetless village on the Alps. Most of the world love to give in to the tempting sexiness of sexiness.

 

[theprestige]

But the end point is the biggie. The implication that all your problems simply stem from the fact that you call them "stupid bitches" and then throw your hands up in amazement as you get rejected again. I'm sure there are idiots that do that. But not everyone that gets rejected is being turned down specifically because they are a misogynistic moron. Though if they are a misogynistic moron I do hope they are getting what they deserve.

You lost me. The end point is that men who get rejected for being misogynistic jerks have only themselves to blame.

Your complaint seems to be that the end point says that men who get rejected for other reasons than being misogynistic jerks have only themselves to blame (but the end point doesn't actually say that), or that men who get rejected for other reasons should blame themselves because they are actually misogynistic jerks (but the end point doesn't actually say that).

I think you got confused by the article's incoherence, and ended up making an incoherent rebuttal.