There go those damned goalposts again
A simple kick, an extra point
Is all, and then we may annoint
The victor in this war of words
Twixt idiots and science nerds
In order for the team to win
The gene producing insulin
Must split the uprights, straight and true,
That's all that Kleinman asks of you.
But wait! The crossbar's much too near
A child could make that kick from here
Precursers shown are not enough--
We need to make the task more tough
And so, I send my best regards
And move the goalposts ten more yards.
The protein superfamily
For insulin in you and me
Is found in other mammals, too
(And rats and mice--why, they have two!)
We'll trace it further, if you wish
To proteins found in zebra fish
(What's cool, you'll see upon reflection--
It fits with natural selection!)
Wait! You'll make that kick with ease
And so, if you'll indulge me, please,
To make the kick that has you winning
Trace the gene to its beginning!
With due respect, and beaming smile,
I'll move the goalposts half a mile.
The crossbar now is but a speck
From here--but maybe...what the heck--
I'll try it, under one condition:
Before I kick--your definition?
Could you define your terms, I mean?
Define "beginning", also "gene"
Your definitions seem to change
If you could narrow down the range--
Wait! The start I want is this--
The gene's abiogenesis!
Or if I think I still might hang
Then trace it back to the Big Bang!
And all the time that I've been talking
Those goalposts, they have kept on walking.
To satisfy my little query
Don't attempt to feed me theory
But, from time itself, condense
The binding, legal evidence.
If insulin evolved, why then
You ought to know precisely when.
Before the gene was well-dispersed
There must be someone who was first.
I want his name (and, you've surmised,
I want it duly notarized!)
If you cannot do that, you fail
And by default, I will prevail!
If lunacy you must defend
The moving goalpost is your friend.