Alex Jones and Martian Slavery

[Gilbert Syndrome]

Cost probably gets handwaved away by assuming tech acquired from aliens crashed at Roswell.

The Mars chocolate company likely sponsored the trip and stocked the kids with a lifetime supply of Mars bars and Malteasers.

A Mars a day helps the slaves work, rest and play.

 

[mgidm86]

Mars needs children.

Nah, Elton says it's too cold.

 

[Oystein]

Yeah, the same low-grade morons who listen to that miserable conspiracy pimp Jones are the same crowd who claim Apollo was a hoax because of the "Van Halen" belts, but will slobber over this idiot claiming NASA operates entire human colonies on Mars. ...

The Van Halen belt is between Earth and Moon, not between Earth and Mars.

 

[beachnut]

The Van Halen belt is between Earth and Moon, not between Earth and Mars.

Eddie Van Halen has a radiation belt. Van Halen, formed in 1972.

 

[The Man]

I was just thinking about this particular conspiracy over the weekend - it is a pretty crazy amount of investment, to set up a secret Mars base and ferry people over there.

Dont you think it would be among most "expensive" conspiracies ever imagined? Getting anything off the planet, for starters, is crazy expensive, let alone getting it to mars, let alone building infrastructure there, self-sustaining infrastructure (or you're paying more to constantly ferry supplies) - plus like, solving for all the challenges of Man's first post-earth colony

like THAT was the easiest way for them to do whatever devious stuff they wanted? Why not a base in the Marianas trench? Its a bit closer!

Right, the Marianas trench and just sit there waiting for James Cameron to find them!!!

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/...rench-challenger-deepest-returns-science-sub/

 

[quadraginta]

I was just thinking about this particular conspiracy over the weekend - it is a pretty crazy amount of investment, to set up a secret Mars base and ferry people over there.

Dont you think it would be among most "expensive" conspiracies ever imagined? Getting anything off the planet, for starters, is crazy expensive, let alone getting it to mars, let alone building infrastructure there, self-sustaining infrastructure (or you're paying more to constantly ferry supplies) - plus like, solving for all the challenges of Man's first post-earth colony

like THAT was the easiest way for them to do whatever devious stuff they wanted? Why not a base in the Marianas trench? Its a bit closer!

Too crowded. The property values are through the roof.

Nobody would ever believe it.

 

[EHocking]

Mars needs children.

 

[CORed]

Okay, suppose you're the kind of slimeball who would want to enslave and murder children and sell their blood and bone marrow. It seems to me, that if you ran this operation on Mars, that while it has the advantage that the cops will not be likely to be kicking in your door, the shipping costs would take all the profit out of it. Wouldn't it be more profitable to build a lair under a volcano on some obscure South Pacific island?

 

[CORed]

Eddie Van Halen has a radiation belt. Van Halen, formed in 1972.

The Van Halen Belt is an area saturated with lethal levels of bad, over-amped electric guitar music.

The only way through it is to time your crossing for when they are playing "Ice Cream Man".

 

[Horatius]

...the shipping costs would take all the profit out of it. Wouldn't it be more profitable to build a lair under a volcano on some obscure South Pacific island?

Hey, enslaving and murdering children on Mars is its own reward!

 

[Elagabalus]

Okay, suppose you're the kind of slimeball who would want to enslave and murder children and sell their blood and bone marrow...

OK, I think that narrows it down to who's actually is behind this diabolical plot.

But why go to Mars if they already own the world?

 

[EHocking]

OK, I think that narrows it down to who's actually is behind this diabolical plot.

But why go to Mars if they already own the world?

Well exactly.
There are so many bastard countries in the world which would be more than happy to maltreat other human beings for profit and provide extradition/prosecution protection into the bargain.

Where's the profit in doing it on Mars?

 

[Mike!]

My gosh what a clickbaity thread title.

Couldn't. Resist. Clicking...

Wow, that was no lie.

Is there anyone on planet earth who is more stupid than Alex Jones?

I'm reminded of a quote I once heard an old man on Tatooine say, "Who's the more foolish, the fool or the fool who follows him?"

Well exactly.
There are so many bastard countries in the world which would be more than happy to maltreat other human beings for profit and provide extradition/prosecution protection into the bargain.

Where's the profit in doing it on Mars?

Volume, volume, volume!

 

[Praktik]

Okay, suppose you're the kind of slimeball who would want to enslave and murder children and sell their blood and bone marrow. It seems to me, that if you ran this operation on Mars, that while it has the advantage that the cops will not be likely to be kicking in your door, the shipping costs would take all the profit out of it. Wouldn't it be more profitable to build a lair under a volcano on some obscure South Pacific island?

Im thinking it may be the most ridiculous conspiracy theory ever proffered, on a cost/benefit analysis looking at the cost of the mechanisms of the conspiracy, in this case establishing an interplanetary colony and relevant shipping routes, vs the potential profit... from....

I guess - making Soylent Green from the marrow?

Judy Wood's orbital beam weapons to take out the 9/11 towers was crazy. There's been plenty out there. But even putting up some orbital future tech beam weapons would be many orders of magnitude less expensive than this one. If not THE most expensive, this one probably in Top 10 eh?

 

[EHocking]

Well exactly.
There are so many bastard countries in the world which would be more than happy to maltreat other human beings for profit and provide extradition/prosecution protection into the bargain.

Where's the profit in doing it on Mars?

Volume, volume, volume!

WELL EXACTLY.
THERE ARE SO MANY BASTARD COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD WHICH WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO MALTREAT OTHER HUMAN BEINGS FROM PROFIT AND PROVIDE EXTRADITION/PROSECUTION PROTECTION INTO THE BARGAIN.

WHERE'S THE PROFIT IN DOING IT ON MARS?

WELL EXACTLY.
THERE ARE SO MANY BASTARD COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD WHICH WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO MALTREAT OTHER HUMAN BEINGS FROM PROFIT AND PROVIDE EXTRADITION/PROSECUTION PROTECTION INTO THE BARGAIN.

WHERE'S THE PROFIT IN DOING IT ON MARS?

WELL EXACTLY.
THERE ARE SO MANY BASTARD COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD WHICH WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO MALTREAT OTHER HUMAN BEINGS FROM PROFIT AND PROVIDE EXTRADITION/PROSECUTION PROTECTION INTO THE BARGAIN.

WHERE'S THE PROFIT IN DOING IT ON MARS?

 

[MikeG]

The Van Halen belt is between Earth and Moon, not between Earth and Mars........

.......erm...... If it is between the Earth and the moon, and the moon is between Earth and Mars, then by a cunning process of deep analysis and critical thinking, I reckon the van Allen belt is also between the Earth and Mars.

 

[The Man]

.......erm...... If it is between the Earth and the moon, and the moon is between Earth and Mars, then by a cunning process of deep analysis and critical thinking, I reckon the van Allen belt is also between the Earth and Mars.

As determined by the Allen Parsons project.

 

[quadraginta]

As determined by the Allen Parsons project.

You're confused.

You're thinking of the Van Alan belt.

 

[Horatius]

You're confused.

You're thinking of the Van Alan belt.

What about Van Morrison's suspenders?

 

[Mr.Herbert]

New video of Alex Jones- sort of.