A question of ethics

politas - I would agree that it is ethical to withdraw priviledges you grant (e.g. your interaction/presence) from someone who breaks social contract. This in itself is not unethical; it is a conditional bonus being granted and thus can be withdrawn if the conditions are violated.

However, taking active harm (eg being rude at minimum intensity) goes beyond this into the at least potentially (or necessarily?) unethical.

Or is "being rude" the default state when the additional priviledges are withdrawn? (This would get harder and harder to justify with increased intensities...)
 
Rephrasing the question:

Is "tit for tat" ethical and/or acceptable and/or justified, beyond pure minimalist selfdefense?

Simple low-intensity example: someone is consistently very rude. OK to be rude back?
Since morality and ethics are relative then it would depend on who you ask. I can only assume you are talking social ethics in which case, AIU, it's considered appropriate by many in New York City but frowned on in many parts of the South. I grew up in a small town in Utah and it was definitely considered inappropriate to be rude regardless of the situation. Don't sink to the other person's level was a well worn phrase. Small town folk prided themselves on being polite to rude city folk. This is not to say that there were no rude small town folk, there were.
 
politas - I would agree that it is ethical to withdraw priviledges you grant (e.g. your interaction/presence) from someone who breaks social contract. This in itself is not unethical; it is a conditional bonus being granted and thus can be withdrawn if the conditions are violated.

However, taking active harm (eg being rude at minimum intensity) goes beyond this into the at least potentially (or necessarily?) unethical.

Or is "being rude" the default state when the additional priviledges are withdrawn? (This would get harder and harder to justify with increased intensities...)
Sorry, can you define what you mean by "being rude".

To me, ignoring someone who talks to me is rude. Saying "please go away and never speak to me again" is rude. I consider it perfectly ethical behaviour when telemarketers call when I'm sleeping in between night shifts, though.
 
Rephrasing the question:

Is "tit for tat" ethical and/or acceptable and/or justified, beyond pure minimalist selfdefense?

Simple low-intensity example: someone is consistently very rude. OK to be rude back?

It may be OK, but it depends on what 'rude' means - is he calling at 4am and waking up your family? Doesn't give you the right to disturb his kids.

Also, it depends on your objective - is this an emotional release, or will being rude actually achieve something?

My family motto is very personal to me, as a Kantian: Remember the End. Do everything with purpose. Would setting an example be more productive? Would leaving him as the only rude person in the exchange be its own victory? Would it elevate you and your life choices in the view of others who are aware of the exchanges?
 

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