Bill Williams
Penultimate Amazing
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2011
- Messages
- 15,713
To be fair, though, the early drafts of the script that I saw didn't require much juggling skill from that character at all - I reasoned that even Madison could handle the quick three-sponge-balls juggle that was scripted to take place in the middle of her harrowing discussion with the protagonist about his strict adherence to the rules laid out in the Tirthankara of Jainism.....
As it turned out, by the time Madison had arrived to audition, the script had changed such that her character was now required to perform an entire solo singing number - "Heaven is a Place on Earth" by Belinda Carlisle - while riding a unicycle and juggling five flaming torches. As you can imagine, I felt like a total mug putting her forward for the role under these changed circumstances, but she already had a non-refundable airline ticket and confirmed reservations at the Earls Court Premier Inn, so we decided it was worth a shot anyhow.
So I don't think that Marriott can justly feel aggrieved at my actions in regard to Madison's audition, under the circumstances. On the other hand, it was I who persuaded Marriott to sink $400,000 of his own money into the project - so maybe he's decided to recoup this total loss through withholding my wages......
Listen, chump, we have that report of yours on file. We read it in the Marriott lunch room for laughs.
Look, you're talking to the guy who spirited an international fugitive across a border frontier, and personally interceded with three criminal jurisdictions to subvert justice. Just ask Grinder. I don't know how, but he's obviously seen the file.
ETA: When I showed my FOA credentials to one senior investigator, he meekly asked if I knew the nuclear codes that The President carries around. I assured him I did, and further suggested that if the local flat foots didn't play ball, I'd personally reduce their puny border town to cinders.
And what have YOU done for Marriott lately? If I were you I'd bone up on torch juggling yourself. The Man is not amused, and you think you can weasel out of this with a fake story of early drafts!!???
Who do you think wrote the thing? Go see "Argo" chump before we take away your decoder ring.