I am truly sorry for the terrible situation you found yourself in through no fault of your own.
Unfortunately, these types of situations are not a "one size fits all". Everyone's experiences are unique.
While I was lucky enough to have had my parents stay together for all of their lives, my wife was not so lucky. Her parents split when she was 11, and she initially ended up with her father in the same house and town she had lived in all her life. Then the mother went for custody and won.
She was forced, at the age of 13, and against her will, to go to a strange town (Tokoroa), where she had no friends, to live with her mother. This was in spite of the fact that she didn't want to go and in spite of the fact that she made it clear that she was frightened of her mother's new boyfriend and his two teenage sons (15 and 17). She was very, very upset by what had happened and felt that no-one had listened to her or had cared about what she wanted. Just like these girls, she made a real scene at the courthouse, but it was no use. As in your case, the mother cut ties with the father. She would not permit any contact.
Two years, several broken ribs, and at least one broken arm later, and after numerous consultations with doctors (who discovered numerous bruises, which were cunningly inflicted in places that were difficult to see; upper thighs, upper arms, under armpits etc) and with the recommendation of the Department of Social Welfare (as it was called then) her father finally convinced the courts to take her away from her mother.
By then, unfortunately, the damage had already been done. Not just the physical damage, but the emotional trauma of feeling trapped with no-one to turn to, of abandonment, of feeling that no-one cared about her, and that she had simply been left to die.
The physical scars healed in due course, although she still suffers aches and pains that both her and her doctor attribute to the frightful beatings she took. However, the emotional scars have never healed. Even now, 40+ years later, she still has nightmares about it.
When she heard from her aunt in 2009 that her stepfather had died, she wept tears of joy... This event did more to heal her than anything that psychologists or counsellors were able to do. I still remember what she yelled on the phone when her aunt told her... "Yes! Yes" Yes" The bastard is dead!!!"
If only the courts had listened to her and acted on it when she was 13!!!
