The crucifixion of Jesus Christ

[Multivac]

Of course more nails. How many "true nails of the cross" have been found? 10? 20? 50? Easilly enough to nail the cross together and then nail him to it.

Unless, of course, the Romans invented flatpack furniture and the cross came as a kit of parts, with blurred diagrams, badly translated instructions and a few spare nails.

Translated from Filipino, apparently...

Using an archaic Filipino to Russian dictionary, followed by a Russian to Latin dictionary. What could possibly go wrong?

 

[Akhenaten]

Did you know why the Israelites reformed their calendar in 358/359 AD? Because they were using two calendars: a purely lunar calendar and a lunisolar calendar. They would like to consolidate it and avoid the Christians attacking their calendars. Also, because the Christians had set Easter or the Christian Passover in 325 AD (33 years earlier) in March or April, the time when the Israelites departed from Egypt and the barley was in the ear.

When you've finished making up new versions Judaism and Christianity do you think you could take a crack at Hinduism?

A PeaceCrusader version of the Mahabharata would be a complete hoot, I reckon.

 

[PeaceCrusader]

He made it up, as a joke. There is no q. crucifera.

Which is a bizarre thing, using an instrument of torture to symbolise a religion, but carry on...

You may not have invented it, but somebody did. Because it is utter nonsense, on a par with WWIII interrupting the 2012 Olympic Games or that there is a giantess living in a remote area of England in a house full of corpses. None of it is real, it is all make-believe.

There is nothing on your web page about the "cross" disappearing, and even if there were it is proof of nothing more than the existence of coincidence.

@Agatha, #356

You are right, Agatha, that ‘there is nothing on your [my] web page about the “cross” disappearing.’ Why? Because I have not updated it yet since it occurred. Actually, I have mentioned in a forum that the cross has disappeared when we finally left Campbelltown in 2004.

I even have a letter with me from the Postal Manager about the renovation of the building that they did sometime from 2004-04-30 to 2004-05-02. All our things were finally shipped from the Campbelltown storage shed on 2004-05-07 to the state of Queensland. Coincidence?

There is a Quercus crucifera mentioned at this web page http://books.google.com.au/books?id...AEwAA#v=onepage&q="Quercus crucifera"&f=false
I do not know how Akuma Tennou knows about the tree, even its scientific name.

Would you like me to translate to you what the message of the mp3 file is?

 

[Akhenaten]

@Agatha, #356

You are right, Agatha, that ‘there is nothing on your [my] web page about the “cross” disappearing.’ Why? Because I have not updated it yet since it occurred. Actually, I have mentioned in a forum that the cross has disappeared when we finally left Campbelltown in 2004.

Why am I hearing the words "Thank Christ they've gone and we can get rid of this monstrosity?"

Can this be the spirit of the Postmaster General speaking to me?

I even have a letter with me from the Postal Manager about the renovation of the building that they did sometime from 2004-04-30 to 2004-05-02.

I have a letter from the Water Board about the replacement of the main that they did sometime from 1997-58-72 to 1998-46-23½.

I win.

All our things were finally shipped from the Campbelltown storage shed on 2004-05-07 to the state of Queensland. Coincidence?

Not even that.

There is a Quercus crucifera mentioned at this web page http://books.google.com.au/books?id...AEwAA#v=onepage&q="Quercus crucifera"&f=false
I do not know how Akuma Tennou knows about the tree, even its scientific name.

When will you be responding to my very generous offer to sell you the Harbour Bridge?

Would you like me to translate to you what the message of the mp3 file is?

There's no need to threaten people.

 

[PeaceCrusader]

20121018.2355

I can remember what I did in my studies of the August 17 crucifixion and May 23 birth of Jesus Christ, that is why I am able to answer your inquiries. I also learn some new things from you.

This is a quotation from “PS I love you” that has guided me in these studies:

“You’ll learn more about a road by travelling it than by consulting all the maps in the world.”

 

[pakeha]

Wasn't that the ratchet scredriver fruit, after it had been left in a dark drawer for many years?

Always good to the Good Book referenced on these fora.

Yes.
There are days when I expect PC will explain his calendar in terms of bistromath.

Until then, following the revelations of those seances, the readings from the Passionfruit Mahjong and hoping for a followup on the adventures of Angelina Imden are amusing enough til this thread finally jumps a shark too far.

 

[Jack by the hedge]

Akuma Tennou would know Quercus crucifera. He is right. It is a silky oak species. He was the one who mentioned it first. So he may tell us how he knows about that Quercus species.

He already did tell us how he knows about it. Are you suffering from selective memory loss? He said the existence of q. crucifera was revealed by 'saint Nostradamus', in his current reincarnation as a panda living in Berlin zoo. Do you still doubt this was a joke?

Now please explain how you know that this imaginary plant is a species of silky oak.

 

[Akhenaten]

20121018.2355
I can remember what I did in my studies of the August 17 crucifixion and May 23 birth of Jesus Christ, that is why I am able to answer your inquiries.

But you don't.

I also learn some new things from you.

No you don't.

This is a quotation from “PS I love you” that has guided me in these studies:

“You’ll learn more about a road by travelling it than by consulting all the maps in the world.”

Here's a quotation from "Alice in Wonderland" that describes the results of your studies.

"Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

 

[Jack by the hedge]

20121018.2355

I can remember what I did in my studies of the August 17 crucifixion and May 23 birth of Jesus Christ, that is why I am able to answer your inquiries.

Cool.

Inquiry: Can you prove the date of the crucifiction without reference to anything 'Ka Apaz' said? Non-fiction crucifiction, if you will.

 

[Shiner]

20121018.2355 + 1083.7645 = 20122102.0000
......“You’ll learn more about a road by travelling it than by consulting all the maps in the world.”

Not when you wear earmuffs and blinkers. For one, you won't see the magic trees.......... It Is Written.

 

[Astreja]

The Holy Bible is not totally wrong.

Aristeo, the fact that it's wrong at all is sufficient to disqualify it as the work of a god. It was written by humans. Deal with it.

Oh, and as long as we're on the subject of coincidences, I have a few interesting ones:

• Born on same day as Mata Hari; daughter born on same day as Sir William Stephenson, "A Man Called Intrepid." Both were espionage agents, and one was born in the city where I currently live.
• Met ex-husband on June 13, and decree of divorce became final on June 13, 28 years later. June 13 is also the anniversary of the first Batman episode I watched.
• When Dragons of Autumn Twilight was published in 1983, Raistlin Majere was 26 and I was 26. We were both bullied in school, both of above-average intelligence, and both became interested in magic after seeing a stage magician at about age 5. I've also met Margaret Weis, one of the primary Dragonlance authors, in real life.
• Oh, and I moved to the island of Montreal on August 17, 1971 and passed My test to receive My white robes on May 23, 1999.

I'm sure that if I dug a bit deeper into My memories I could come up with enough alleged "coincidences" to put forth the case that I, Myself am either Jesus or the Antichrist. Or possibly both simultaneously, which would fit nicely with the revisionist absurdity of this thread.

 

[sleepy_lioness]

@Astreja, #339

The Holy Bible is not totally wrong. The spirit of Ama recommended that we use the King James Version of the Holy Bible supplemented by “Pasiong Mahal”. I used mainly the Holy Bible in my study proving that Jesus was crucified on August 17 (http://aristean.org/crucifyidx.htm ).

Do you know why Pentecost in Acts 2:1 wrong? Because the translators of the Bible when they fixed Passover in March or April when Jesus was allegedly crucified, the nearest festival was Pentecost in May. It would have been harder to justify if they retained that the festival was Tabernacle in September/October.

It seems ridiculous to correct you on such a small point ... but there is no translation problem with Acts 2.1. The original Greek text quite clearly says that it was Pentecost.

 

[Recovering Agnostic]

I'm sure that if I dug a bit deeper into My memories I could come up with enough alleged "coincidences" to put forth the case that I, Myself am either Jesus or the Antichrist. Or possibly both simultaneously, which would fit nicely with the revisionist absurdity of this thread.

Stardate -310202.9

Astreja is the second coming! Everyone look busy!

 

[Meadmaker]

@Meadmaker, #336

You are right, Meadmaker, that the book of Esther was using a lunisolar calendar right from the start. This was when Esther was in Babylon. Chapters 3 and 4 talk about Nisan and Adar. Why is the Fast of Esther in Adar now when it was in Nisan when it took place?

Esther fasted in Nisan. The "Fast of Esther" was never in Nisan.

The Fast of Esther commemorates Esther's fast, but it has never been held on the anniversary of that fast. The Book of Esther records the decree that 14th Adar should be a day of feasting (unless you live in a walled city, in which case it is 15th Adar. At some point, I really have to ask a rabbi if that includes eruvs. Since I live inside an Eruv, should we be celebrating on 15 Adar? Not that it matters much, because we're kind of ultra-reform Jews who don't always even make it to the synagogue for Purim, much less do anything because of an eruv.)

At some point, we don't know when, someone decided that the celebration of Purim was only possible because of Esther's fast, and that, too, should be commemorated, so they put a fast day on the day before Purim, and called it the Fast of Esther. It has never been observed during Nisan.

Regarding the Feast of Dedication, to which season does the Jewish month of Kislev belong? It is in Autumn, isn’t it? What does John 10:22 say about the Feast of Dedication? It was winter, wasn’t it? So why Kislev? Why in Autumn?

Kislev can begin any time from early November to early December, making Hanukah start,at the earliest, at the end of November and end, at the latest, in early January. Some portion of Hanukkah always falls in December.

Now if you want to rest your interpretation of prophecy on some insistence that early December is certainly Autumn and certainly not Winter, good luck.

Hanukkah falls at the darkest time of the year. It always includes the period of the new moon closest to the Winter solstice. To my way of thinking, that sounds a lot like Winter.

 

[Meadmaker]

Acts 2:1 should not at Pentecost (Shavuoth) but in Tabernacles (Sukkoth). I am the one who is saying that Act 2:1 should not at Pentecost. The spirit of Ama did not say that it is wrong. Why is it wrong? First is that the day following the ascension of Jesus to Heaven was the Feast of Tabernacles.

Says who?

Second is where will you find people get drunk:

Huh? There's one day when Jews are encouraged to get drunk. It's Purim.

You know that Pentecost is 50 days after Passover.

Close. The counting starts during Passover, not at the beginning or the end.

Jesus ascended to Heaven on the forty-third day. What would you do if the promised gift did not come on the 44th day? On the 45th day? On the 46th day? On the 47th day? On the 48th day? You would charge that Jesus is a false prophet, wouldn’t you? You might walk away after the promise is not fulfilled after three days that He ascended. How about if immediately after the ascension, the following day, the gift of tongue was given? You would become enthusiastic, wouldn’t you? Would you believe that truly Jesus fulfilled His promise of sending the Spirit? That is why Acts 2:1 should be in Tabernacles (Sukkoth) and not at Pentecost (Shavuoth).

I don't get it. You would be bummed out, and then elated, and somehow that means Sukkoth instead of Shavuoth. Can you explain this one a bit more clearly?

Did you know why the Israelites reformed their calendar in 358/359 AD? Because they were using two calendars: a purely lunar calendar and a lunisolar calendar.

Is this another Ama thing?

 

[Rincewind]

Aristeo, the fact that it's wrong at all is sufficient to disqualify it as the work of a god. It was written by humans. Deal with it.

Oh, and as long as we're on the subject of coincidences, I have a few interesting ones:

• Born on same day as Mata Hari; daughter born on same day as Sir William Stephenson, "A Man Called Intrepid." Both were espionage agents, and one was born in the city where I currently live.
• Met ex-husband on June 13, and decree of divorce became final on June 13, 28 years later. June 13 is also the anniversary of the first Batman episode I watched.
• When Dragons of Autumn Twilight was published in 1983, Raistlin Majere was 26 and I was 26. We were both bullied in school, both of above-average intelligence, and both became interested in magic after seeing a stage magician at about age 5. I've also met Margaret Weis, one of the primary Dragonlance authors, in real life.
• Oh, and I moved to the island of Montreal on August 17, 1971 and passed My test to receive My white robes on May 23, 1999.

I'm sure that if I dug a bit deeper into My memories I could come up with enough alleged "coincidences" to put forth the case that I, Myself am either Jesus or the Antichrist. Or possibly both simultaneously, which would fit nicely with the revisionist absurdity of this thread.

Well - you appear to be a shoe-in for the $1,000,000.

 

[Astreja]

Well - you appear to be a shoe-in for the $1,000,000.

I'd probably spend it all on clarinets, chocolate and coffee breaks in diverse places around the globe. If I did win that much moolah, though, I want to donate some to the local food bank, some to shelters and counselling services for people escaping abuse, some to local hospital foundations, and generally try to put Matthew 25:35-40 into practice.

Although I might save a few thou to get that shiny red BMW I've always wanted...

 

[Rincewind]

I'd probably spend it all on clarinets, chocolate and coffee breaks in diverse places around the globe. If I did win that much moolah, though, I want to donate some to the local food bank, some to shelters and counselling services for people escaping abuse, some to local hospital foundations, and generally try to put Matthew 25:35-40 into practice.

Although I might save a few thou to get that shiny red BMW I've always wanted...

Go on... Spoil yourself, have two...

 

[Blue Mountain]

Go on... Spoil yourself, have two...

An alto and a tenor clarinet?

 

[Astreja]

I had to look it up (and not on Aristeo's site, either!), but yes, there actually is such a thing as a tenor clarinet. And I thought altos and eefers were rare. I think a bass clarinet and about 10 years' lessons, and I'm good.

I am getting worried about some of the, um, feral donkey assertions that Aristeo has been posting. He's admitted to updating his site (an odd thing to do if one already possesses Da Troof, n'est-ce pas?) and despite wanting to "learn" from us I rather suspect he's quote-mining us to provide himself with fresh material.

And I still think we should get a recording of his voice, and the voice of Ka Apaz, and the voice of the alleged "Ama," and do a comparison. For that matter, are there any references to Ka Apaz and/or Ama that aren't on Aristeo's site?